The Remote Island : NBC

NBC Wants "Chuck", But Cheaper

Jake Kalish — Fri, 15 May 2009 19:33:00 GMT

Whatever happened to that saying "You've got to spend money to make money?" Either take the show or don't, Peacock. Don't take a borderline show with a devoted, fanatical fan base ,cut its resources, and then expect it to succeed. NBC is still ostensibly one of the four major networks, but sometimes they feel a lot like UHF. This from Entertainment Weekly:

Question: What's the latest on Chuck's renewal? --Dave
Ausiello: Warner Bros. and NBC are haggling over money. Shocking, I know. If a deal can be worked out -- and I have every reason to believe it can (and will) be -- it'll be back for a 13-episode third season.

Good. Back, we're sure, with a whole lot more product placement.

PREVIOUSLY:

Will The "Save Chuck" Subway Sandwich Movement Keep The Show On The Air?

Is "Chuck" In Trouble?

"Chuck" Characters Keep Being Named After Ex-Athletes And No One Knows Why

Is "Parks and Recreation" Really Less Funny Than "Joey"?

Jake Kalish — Fri, 15 May 2009 17:11:00 GMT

That's what Maureen Ryan of the Chicago Tribune says. Oof - that's rough. She does present a detailed and compelling argument, though...

People bash "Joey" as the worst example of NBC's tendency to extend its franchises well beyond what is desirable or logical. Yet "Parks and Recreation" is a more dispiriting example of the same trend, because far more talent is going to waste on this show...

For years, Amy Poehler was one of the best things about "Saturday Night Live." Clearly she has talent to spare, and the idea of her creating a comedy with writers Greg Daniels and Michael Schur of "The Office" seemed like an excellent idea.

Unfortunately that idea was not ready for prime time; Schur, Daniels and Poehler needed more time to marinate their ideas.

But NBC was bound and determined to have an Amy Poehler comedy on the air this season, and what co-chair Ben Silverman wants, he gets. The end result of all that rushing, however, is that much of "Parks and Recreation," which airs it season finale Thursday, comes off as half-baked and decidedly unfunny.

By this point in its life cycle, Daniels' version of "The Office," which also started with a six-episode tryout season, was showing quite a bit of promise. NBC has renewed "Parks and Recreation," but it's hard to see why. Then again, having forced this show on the air, executives at the network can hardly admit their mistake now.

The biggest problem is that Poehler's character, officious and dim parks bureaucrat Leslie Knope is as unappealing than she was in the first episode. Not once have I rooted for this strained character, who has more ambition than "The Office's" Michael Scott but none of his child-like charm. It’s hard to escape the conclusion that Poehler should be playing a smart if sometimes inept character --someone like Liz Lemon on “30 Rock” -- not a female Michael Scott with delusional political ambitions.

Like we, said, oof. Rough - but also a lot like what our Remote Bryan said, though he had a lot more hope in his voice.

PREVIOUSLY:

We Think "Parks And Recreation" Will Probably Get A Lot Better Than It Already Is. You?

The Rumors Are True: "Parks And Recreation" Is Probably Too Much Like "The Office" [VIDEO]

Rashida Jones + Jon Favreau ?

Rashida Jones vs. Andy Samberg [VIDEO]

"The Biggest Loser": Is It Wrong To Be Disappointed?

Lindy Parker — Wed, 13 May 2009 17:00:00 GMT

Okay, so just to be clear, it's not that we dislike Helen, or that we don't think it's both amazing and inspiring that she lost 140 pounds at the age of 48, it's just that we really wanted MIke to win...

Possibly, we're just bitter that Helen said she didn't care about winning the money. Obviously, we understand that for the Biggest Loser contestants, the life-changing degree of weight loss is the real prize -- one that can't be taken away by not winning the competition -- but still, in the middle of an economic crisis, the idea that a person wouldn't care about winning a quarter of a million dollars offends us. Also, there's a manic, high-strung frenzy about skinny Helen that we find a tad unsettling. That said, we do admire Helen's unstoppable drive to accomplish her goals and also to include her husband in the process...

Previously:

The Biggest Loser Finale Airs Tonight!
The Biggest Loser Isn't a Show, It's a Lifestyle
“Biggest Loser” Star Shannon Thomas Allegedly Assaults A Man With Flour
“Momma’s Boys” Loses Even More Than “The Biggest Loser”
Number of Times We Teared Up During “Biggest Loser Families”: 7

We Celebrate The 20th Anniversary Of "The More You Know" With Our 5 Favorite Phony "The More You Knows" [VIDEO]

Jake Kalish — Fri, 08 May 2009 21:35:00 GMT

NBC's "The More You Know" is celebrating Its 20th anniversary on-air and the final Celebrity Apprentice will have Annie Duke and Joan Rivers creating their very own "The More You Know" PSAs. This 20th anniversary is a major milestone - these public service announcements taught us not to get STDs or do dope. Plus, they've been made fun of a lot. So, as our own little end-of the week celebration, we've got our 5 favorite phony installments of "The More You Know", from various television programs...

Max Weinberg On Hookers:

Dwight Schrute Of The Office On What To Do In Case Of Bear Attack:

J.D. Dorian Of Scrubs Against Smothering Kids (PSA Comes 25 seconds into clip):

Ryan Howard Of The Office On Not Taping Yourself Having Sex

Conan O'Brien On Fighting:

PREVIOUSLY:

"Swine Flu? Man, I'm Too Fast For That To Catch Me!" [VIDEO]

Is Keira Knightley Reaching Out To Rihanna?

Hilary Duff's "That's So Gay" PSA

Blast From The Past: Singing Pills Say "We're Not Candy"

Mindy Kaling Will Create And Star In An NBC Comedy

Jake Kalish — Wed, 06 May 2009 16:12:00 GMT

No worries - she's not leaving The Office. Damn, that's a big workload, Kelly Kapoor. All that, and the blog? Who do you think you are, Jay Leno? Or are we looking at the new Tina Fey? And how will Tina Fey feel about being the old Tina Fey?

Anyway, we have to grudgingly admit that this is a much better gig than what we had planned for Mindy Kaling. Also, a whole lot more money - it's reportedly a 2-year, seven-figure deal.

PREVIOUSLY:

The Mindy Kaling/Kelly Kapoor Fashion And Beauty Book - We Want A Cut

Read Mindy Kaling's Blog

"The Office", Now And Forever

Goodbye, "Life", Goodbye, Sarah Shahi [PHOTOS]

Jake Kalish — Tue, 05 May 2009 21:35:00 GMT

NBC will not bring back Life next season - which means farewell for now to the lovely Sarah Shahi.

Sarah, we first got to know you as Carmen on The L Word, in all your various states of undress. We've developed quite a TV love affair over the years, Sarah, romantically sharing so many nights in a darkened apartment lit only by your beauty onscreen. Sarah, we don't even care that you got pregnant and it almost certainly isn't ours. We will miss you so much, Sarah. Will you miss us? All we have to remind us of those nights together are these photographs. And we've been looking so long at these pictures of you that we almost believe that they're real...

We almost believe that the pictures are all we can feel.

PREVIOUSLY:

"The L Word": Lesbian School Is Out Forever

Chill, Vanity Fair, It's "The L Word"

Girlcrush Of The Week: Gabrielle Union Subbing For Sarah Shahi On "Life"!

The New "Leno" Will Be A Hell Of A Lot Like The Old Leno [VIDEO]

Jake Kalish — Tue, 05 May 2009 13:35:00 GMT

This from the new show website:

His show will be the first-ever entertainment program to be stripped across primetime on broadcast network television and will showcase many of the features that have made Leno America's late-night leader for more than a dozen years. Signature elements will include his opening monologue, new comedy skits, big stunts, and well-known segments like "Headlines" and "Jaywalking."

Hey, sounds exactly like The Tonight Show With Jay Leno! Like "new comedy skits" as a selling point, too - like we were expecting them to just repeat years-old sketches from another show. Hell, it's NBC, they might try that. So, despite all the similarities, NBC still has the stones to make this claim:

Jay Leno is transforming television and it's going to be quite a ride.

He's transforming television? Because he's doing an 11:30 show an hour-and-a-half earlier? God Bless The Chin, though, he's trying. Look at Jay promoting away...

PREVIOUSLY:

Jay Leno: "Conan Was Holding A Pillow Over My Face" [VIDEO]

Conan O'Brien Will Love This

NBC Wins! Boston Will Get To See Leno's New Show

SNL: "Weekend Update Thursday"? Really?

Jake Kalish — Mon, 04 May 2009 20:44:00 GMT

Really?

You're going to take the head writer of a show that's been awfully written this year and double his workload by making him host 13 primetime Thursday half-hour Weekend Updates? Really? Because of all the hype you got for Update in an election year? Really? You know Sarah Palin and John McCain sketches won't seem quite so timely in November 2009, right?

And NBC, are you just never going to have a show with production values anymore, now that this one is tanking? Are you going to just be the network of white guys sitting behind desks? Really?

PREVIOUSLY:

NBC: Incompetent Would Be A Step Up [VIDEO]

Conan O'Brien Will Love This

Now The Election Belongs To "SNL"

NBC Will Renew "Chuck", "Parks & Recreation", "Southland", "Medium", and "Law and Order"

Jake Kalish — Mon, 04 May 2009 14:22:00 GMT

Peacock executives will make the announcement today. And, presumably, screw that up somehow.

The one really on the bubble here was Chuck, as evidenced by the "Save Chuck" subway sandwich movement. Maybe if NBC's shows actually start to be watched they won't have to rely on the blatant, cutesy product placement for money.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Celebrity Apprentice" Will Be Back - With More Whore Pit Vipers [VIDEO]

NBC: Incompetent Would Be A Step Up [VIDEO]

Conan O'Brien Will Love This

We Think "Parks And Recreation" Will Probably Get A Lot Better Than It Already Is. You?

"Kings": Already In Trouble

Will The "Save Chuck" Subway Sandwich Movement Keep The Show On The Air? [VIDEO]

Tragedy Strikes NBC

Jake Kalish — Fri, 01 May 2009 17:01:00 GMT

Nora O'Brien, 44, an NBC Universal program executive, collapsed and died of a brain aneurysm while playing basketball on the set of Parenthood. Ms. O'Brien came to NBC from the Sci Fi Channel, where she was Vice President Of Original Programming, working on shows like Battlestar Galactica.

Rest In Peace.

PREVIOUSLY:

R.I.P. Bea Arthur

NBC: Incompetent Would Be A Step Up [VIDEO]

Sports Announcing: "This Puts Everything In Perspective"

Is This Guy That Hot?

Jake Kalish — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 15:11:00 GMT

Apparently Taylor Kitsch, who plays Tim Riggins on Friday Night Lights and will star as Gambit in Wolverine: Origins, is the hottest man to ever grace the Earth, or so says this article and all the dripping, out-of-breath women quoted in it. Ladies, keep it together...

“His lips are always so red,” said Lindsey Berns (rather dreamily), the director of college counseling at Brooklyn Friends. “And he gets that flush on his face … he has really beautiful skin. And I’m a sucker for well-defined arms.”

“He has Brad Pitt–circa–Thelma and Louise–era lips,” agreed Margaret Brown, a television producer who owns a T-shirt for Riggins’ team, the Dillon Panthers. “His hair is always a little bit greasy—but you know he smells like stale beer and sweat. Yum.”

“He’s just so pretty. He might be the prettiest,” said best-selling young adult novelist Gayle Forman.

“I think he has picked up the mantle of sweet Canadian teen hotness that was abandoned by Scott Speedman a few years ago. Long may he reign,” said freelance writer Jen Silverman.

Perhaps most to the point was the view of one lady who was too embarrassed to be named: “Watching Tim Riggins every week is like watching soft porn.”

Wow. Soft porn? Lips? Stale beer and sweat? Ladies, if all you're looking for is stale beer and sweat...

So is this cat really all that? Another look:

Your humble correspondent can clearly not tell a regular, run-of-the-mill hot mactor from Taylor Kitsch, whose hotness evidently knows no boundaries. So we put it to you: is this guy that hot?

PREVIOUSLY:

"Friday Night Lights": Dirty Sexy Football

"Friday Night Lights" Renewed For Two More Seasons -- Let's Twitter!

"Friday Night Lights" Hasn't Been Paid By Austin, TX

"Celebrity Apprentice" Will Be Back - With More Whore Pit Vipers [VIDEO]

Jake Kalish — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 19:33:00 GMT

Celebrity Apprentice will be back next season on NBC. Hopefully, that means we'll see more wild tirades like this one from Sunday night's show, when Melissa Rivers called poker player Annie Duke and former Playmate of The Year Brande Roderick "whore pit vipers" and her mom Joan referenced Nazis and white trash....

Wouldn't "Whore Pit Vipers" be an awesome afternoon show at the grindhouse, maybe as part of a double feature with one of the Ilsa movies? Now that would be a Sunday well spent.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Celebrity Apprentice" To Shift To Two-Hour Format?

Sorry, Donald!

"The Apprentice": Why Is "You're Fired" So Damned Good?

Who Ordered More Al Roker?

Jake Kalish — Wed, 29 Apr 2009 18:35:00 GMT

Aw, we like Al Roker. We do. But we feel Al Roker may be taking advantage of that like by taking over our world.

Big Al (littler since the gastric bypass) remains the weatherman for the Today Show, and still does all them Food Network shows, but will now also host the Weather Channel's Wake Up With Al show from 6 to 7 am Eastern starting this summer.

Again, we like Al Roker. But the title of this show needs work. Does anyone dream of waking up with Al Roker, besides his wife, Deborah Roberts?You roll over in bed and there's Al Roker, with a corny joke and the weather forecast. On the plus side, he's sweet, and we bet he'd cook us a great breakfast.

PREVIOUSLY:

That Nut Al Roker Has A Ball On Halloween

Imaginary TV Fights: Tiki Barber Of "The Today Show" vs. Tiki Barber Of "Football Night In America"

"Christmas In Rockefeller Center": Letter To The Stars

NBC: Incompetent Would Be A Step Up [VIDEO]

Jake Kalish — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 20:44:00 GMT

Apparently NBC's promo department can't distinguish between Tina Fey and Liz Lemon, the character she plays on 30 Rock...

A new promo, which discusses what's happening to various characters in various Peacock shows, says "Tina gets played in an all-new 30 Rock." No, she doesn't. But perhaps Liz Lemon does. Don't know if NBC's promotional people have always had a problem distinguishing between fantasy and reality, but just in case:

1) ALF is not real

2) KITT cannot talk, so stop asking it questions

3) That Japanese guy from Heroes isn't able to travel back in time, so don't keep requesting "cool Samurai stuff."

PREVIOUSLY:

Conan O'Brien Will Love This

We Called It: "Chopping Block" Has Been Chopped

Judah Friedlander, World Champion [VIDEO]

Salma Hayek Likes To Sync Her Weddings With Her "30 Rock" Appearances

Tracy Jordan Officially Is Tracy Morgan [VIDEO]

Conan O'Brien Will Love This

Jake Kalish — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 15:11:00 GMT

According to their marketing director, NBC's top marketing priority for 2009 is...

Jay Leno.Yeah, because America is so unfamiliar with that guy. You ever get the feeling NBC executives secretly have money on NBC failing? Or that maybe they got their jobs because they read something about television once? Don't make a new show your top marketing priority. Don't make the new Tonight Show host your top marketing priority. Don't make any of the shows on your network that are actually really good (The Office, 30 Rock, Friday Night Lights) but not watched enough your top priority. Nah, don't do that, Peacock. Put all your money behind The Chin. Here's the explanation:

“Leno is the single most important marketing priority of the year,” says NBC Entertainment Marketing President Adam Stotsky. “We are deploying the necessary resources and bringing out the heavy creative guns.”

Stotsky hints that one potential positioning will be as an accompaniment to the network's news programming. “He [Leno] likes to talk about this as a broadcasting brand. You can start your day getting informed on topical issues with Today, get deeper insight with Nightly News and Brian Williams, and then laugh about the news at 10 with Leno.”

Great! Or we can laugh at the news at 11 and 11:30 with Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert! Because they're way more funny, edgy, and relevant than Jay Leno! We get it, this 10 o'clock nightly talk show hasn't been done before. Mostly because it's a bad idea. But as a cost-saving measure, it makes some sense. Sacrifice a little in ratings and save a lot of money, which you can then put into other stuff. But making Leno the #1 marketing priority throws all that out the window.

If NBC's executives were chefs, the first recipe in their cookbook would be for chicken salad made out of chicken shit.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Kings": Already In Trouble

We Called It: "Chopping Block" Has Been Chopped

Jay Leno Takes His First Sick Day In 17 Years

NBC Wins! Boston Will Get To See Leno's New Show

Is Conan O'Brien Really "Thrilled" Leno's Moving To 10?

When Leno Goes Primetime, Talk Shows Will Outnumber Other NBC Programming By Half-An-Hour

John Madden Retires From Broadcasting

Jake Kalish — Thu, 16 Apr 2009 19:33:00 GMT

The 73-year old Madden will presumably sit on his piles of video game money. Seriously, John Madden could do nothing with the rest of his living days but burn Benjamin Franklins and he'd still die a millionaire. And his successor on NBC's Sunday Night Football is...

Chris Collinsworth. Great analyst, but the rare sports announcer who is actually too negative and snarky. Collinsworth is sharp like a knife, and he will cut NFL players and coaches with that knife. Watching Collinsworth analyze football, the constant thought is "Good point. But why'd you have to be such a dick making it?"

Anyway, here's part of Madden's announcement:

It’s time. I’m 73 years old. My 50th wedding anniversary is this fall. I have two great sons and their families and my five grandchildren are at an age now when they know when I’m home and, more importantly, when I’m not…

Good for him. Yes, Madden has a whole lot of schtick, with the "booms" and the nonsense words, but he's also probably the best football analyst ever. He's won 16 Emmys as outstanding Sports Analyst/Personality. Then there were all the commercials. The best-selling books. And the video game, which has sold 65 million copies. When you combine that with the fact that he's a Hall Of Fame coach with the highest winning percentage (.750) in NFL history, you realize - it's possible that no non-player in the history of sports has ever had as much success, in as many different ways, as John Madden. It's easy to think of him as just a fat doofus (and the Frank Caliendo impressions make it easier) but what the man's done is incredible.So happy retirement, John Madden. Boom!

PREVIOUSLY:

Sports Announcing: "This Puts Everything In Perspective"

You've Been Warned, Non-Sports Loving Lovers of Sports fans: Nonstop Sports Orgy Monday

NCAA Tournament Coverage: Jay Bilas Is No Dick Vitale [VIDEO]

Can YOU Hold Your Breath For the Length of a Lindsay Lohan Single?

Lindy Parker — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 19:30:00 GMT

If so, you could beat out British free diver, Sara Campbell, who recently held her breath for a full three minutes and thirty six seconds while diving to a depth of 314 feet. Let's all try it shall we? Below we've embedded a video of La Lohan's single "Rumors" which, as luck would have it, lasts exactly 3:36 seconds. On the plus side, if you don't make it, and instead pass out and die, that might actually be preferable to listening to the full song...

Okay, we didn't make it. Although, after two attempts, we had to turn the sound off on the video and give it a couple more tries. Bottom line: we have a whole new respect for Sara Campbell's world record. Go ahead, girl...

Previously:

Lindsay Lohan's a Straight To Cable Girl These Days

OK, Which Prankster At "The Office" Created This Website?

Chenda Ngak — Mon, 13 Apr 2009 15:25:00 GMT

In last week's episode of The Office, we were introduced to The Michael Scott Paper Company. And we noticed that the website went up just in time. So, who's behind it?

The website has pictures of Michael's new office, the coupon that causes conflict between Ryan and Pam, and even merchandise. OK, we had to admit that at first we thought it was like another spoof site in honor of The Office. And we even went through the effort to looked it up on WhoIs.net. In the end, we figured that site had to be legit. Who else would have a PDF of the coupon?

So the question remains: Was it Michael, Pam, or Ryan who put up the website? Will it be mentioned in this week's episode? We've got our greenbacks on Pam. She went to Pratt, after all, and It seems like the writers are finally giving her a break with the advent of her first paper sale. Also, Ryan? Never.

PREVIOUSLY:

Out Of "The Office": Melora Hardin Gets An FX Drama Pilot

Photo Of The Day: "Office" Peeps

"The Office", Now And Forever

Are The Writers Of "The Office" Obsessed With "The Wire"?

"Kings": Already in Trouble

Lindy Parker — Wed, 08 Apr 2009 19:00:00 GMT

When we first saw the Kings billboards in the subway, we were kind of enamored with them -- mostly because they remind of us "The Gates" in Central Park...

Right? Actually, looking at them now side by side, you won't be able to convince us that the similarity wasn't intentional. Regardless, the point is that even though we enjoyed the posters, they didn't necessarily have us running to dvr the show. Apparently, we were not the only ones less than enthused about Kings...

NBC is replacing freshman drama Kings on Sunday nights, yanking the struggling allegorical series after four episodes. Kings will be swapped out for another hour of Dateline, which will now run for two hours starting at 7 p.m.
Sunday's Kings episode was seen by 3.6 million viewers and received a 1.1 rating among adults 18-49. Yet Dateline had a 1.5 rating in its half hour leading into Kings. NBC suspects an expanded Dateline will provide a better lead-in for 9 p.m.'s Celebrity Apprentice, which has seen some audience erosion in recent weeks that might be attributed to Kings. (The Live Feed)

Yikes. Not only is Kings going down, but it was taking Celebrity Apprentice down with it -- although, in fairness, we're not 100% sure Celebrity Apprentice was exactly a ratings powerhouse to begin with. If we want to see the likes of Joan Rivers and Donald Trump stage an intervention about Dennis Rodman's drinking problem, we'll watch Celebrity Rehab with the kinder, gentler face of Dr. Drew.

A note to those remaining, stalwart fans of Kings -- All is not necessarily lost, NBC will air "the remaining eight episodes on Saturday nights at 8pm starting April 18" (The Live Feed). There's still time to rally support.

Previously:

Is NBC's "Kings" Gonna Be Any Good?

"Kings": NBC Clearly Wants to Pick This Up Where "Battlestar Galactica" Left Off

"Kings" Crowns A Gay Prince

Today in ¿Qué?: Jay Leno's New Show To Air On Telemundo In Boston?

Olivia Purnell — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 20:27:00 GMT

Boston: Have no fear, Telemundo's here.

Last Week, Ed Ansin owner of NBC's Boston Affiliate, WHDH, announced that channel 7 will not be airing The Jay Leno Show in the 10pm time slot this fall, leaving Bostonians Leno-less.

But NBC has announced that Leno will air with or without stupid channel 7 and their stupid WHDH call sign. NBC has other friends in Boston, other station owners with other channels. They'll just take their Leno elsewhere.

The network says that four other stations in the area could air the show. One of them is a Telemundo station owned by the network, and the other three are independent stations.

Oh Jay. So much drama! We say screw WHDH! Take your early evening stylings to Telemundo. Are you and Kevin Eubanks up on your Espanol? How do you feel about possible guest appearances on the afternoon telenovelas? We're excited. We could see a whole different side of you. A Spanish side. With a mustache. And a secret lover, who is also your brother's wife. And you will obviously have to kill your brother because la passion is too strong. It's just too strong.

(tvsquad.com)

Previously:

NBC's Boston Affiliate Dumps Jay Leno

Seth Rogan Shows Jay Leno His Skinny Butt Crack

When Leno Goes Primetime, Talk Shows Will Outnumber Other NBC Programming By Half-An-Hour

We Called It: "Chopping Block" Has Been Chopped

Jake Kalish — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 19:33:00 GMT

We told you so! Na na boo boo!

(We just looked up how to spell "Na na boo boo", which makes us feel a lot less cool. If you're interested, there's division on whether "na na" is one word or two, and on how many "na nas" should be included with the standard two "boo boos" )...

Chopping Block has been canceled, effective immediately. The last ep posted a 0.9 rating, which is every bit as bad as it sounds. On the good side, it did lasso 2% of the craved 18-49 demo. When you think about it, a certain percentage of people watch something simply because it's on a network - so you could have probably aired anything on NBC and it would have done as well as Chopping Block. An entire show of nothing but hormonal, insecure 14-year-old boys lying about their summer camp sexual exploits would have probably done as well.

Come to think of it, we might watch that.

PREVIOUSLY:

"Chopping Block" May Be On The Chopping Block

Cat Cora is A Sci-Fi Lesbian

Anthony Bourdain Picks And Pans

Andrew Zimmern Can't Possibly Keep Pretending Bugs Are Tasty [VIDEO]

Padma Lakshmi Does Improv Comedy, We Issue A Call To Arms

"Chopping Block" May Be On The Chopping Block

Jake Kalish — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 21:25:00 GMT

Nobody watched. Like nooo-body. These were even bad ratings for NBC. This after almost nobody watched the series premiere, which got mostly crappy reviews.

Not even the Peacock can withstand ratings like this for long. Surprise, surprise. You mean the 38th competitive cooking show on TV, starring a British chef few Americans have heard of (Marco Pierre White, for the trivia question) didn't get huge numbers?

PREVIOUSLY:

TV Ratings: "Hell's Kitchen" On Fire

Mario Batali vs. Gordon Ramsay

Anthony Bourdain Picks And Pans

"Kings": NBC Clearly Wants Us To Pick This Up Where "Battlestar" Leaves Off

Bryan Christian — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 13:28:00 GMT

The first time we saw an ad for Kings, NBC's slightly sci-fi retelling of the David and Goliath story, it was in the middle of Inauguration Weekend, as Barack Obama made his way to Washington by train. You've probably seen the ad since -- "a kingdom at war needs hope," they've re-run it constantly the last couple weeks -- but on that weekend, we couldn't help but admire NBC for the baldness of their attempt to link a mid-season replacement to the incoming President. And, of course, we wondered: would that strategy work? Could a show get an audience purely through the audacity of, erm, a few well-placed ads?

Well, maybe we give the NBC promo department too much credit, but about halfway through last night's series premiere, we found ourselves wondering again about the timing behind Kings. This time, though, it wasn't that NBC might be trying to capitalize on the beginning of something... No, rather it seemed clear that NBC's hoping that Kings'll be a decent substitute for something that's ending right as it begins, leaving a decently rabid fanbase with nothing new to follow.

So, can Kings be the new Battlestar Galactica? We're not sure yet...

It's certainly got a number of the same pieces in play. Kings is a little higher budget than BSG, but you've still got a wartorn people, a grunt's eye view of battle, characters driven by a sense of spiritual destiny, and a charismatic TV veteran in the center of a cast of unknowns. Both shows present worlds with their own peculiar politics and social structures, which the creators obviously hope the viewers find interesting. And both shows have a serious, mournful tone that distracts from both the soapy aspects of the plot and its decidedly SF trappings.

So is it too much to think that NBC delayed the premiere of one show to coincide with the end of the other? Maybe. The two hour Kings premiere lacked the apocalyptic fever of Battlestar's three-hour opener, so it hasn't grabbed us a surely, but it also seems possible that Kings, with its bigger budgets and Big Three home, won't be quite as -- dare we say it -- sloppy as Battlestar has been over the years. (We know, we know; we'll say more on this soon. In the meantime, all we have to say is: raise your hand if you got tired of thinking that this Resurrection Ship would be the last one!)

The real question for us now is: what happens when Caprica premieres, because honestly, this is sort of what we'd expected/hoped that show, the prequel to Battlestar Galactica, to be. Actually, strike that -- we'd sort of imagined Caprica to be like Kings, but with a dash of Mad Men -- have you seen those deco sets and smart suits?

So what do you guys think? Any Battlestar fans out there gonna keep watching Kings, or are you just SOL until Caprica?

The New Face Of The Winter Olympics Is The Old Face Of The Winter Olympics

Jake Kalish — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 16:11:00 GMT

Al Michaels has been tabbed to host NBC's daytime coverage of the 2010 Vancouver Winter Olympics, with the MLB Network's new star, of course, being the primetime host. Michaels hosting makes sense, because his distinguished broadcasting career got its big break when he made the most famous call in sports history for the most famous moment in Winter Olympics history, The 1980 "Miracle On Ice"...

"Kings" Crowns a Gay Prince

Olivia Purnell — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 17:30:00 GMT

The new NBC show Kings asks the question: can a modern-day prince inherit the crown with a queen by his side?

Answer:

Nope, not really.

Kings is set in an embattled New York City run by contemporary royalty. The King, the ever-unsettling Ian McShane of Deadwood, is displeased with his gay son and becomes enamored with the common soldier who saves the prince in battle. The straight soldier is suddenly “the reluctant poster boy for hope,” and the gay Prince is left to his clubbing, pouting, and general man-whoring . . . you know, gay stuff. (gawker.com)

The premise sounds fairly promising. We’re hoping for a nuanced exploration of the dynamic between the young Prince, his straight replacement (who may bed the princess), and his homophobe father. Here’s hoping the good stuff doesn’t get glossed over.

Also, we can’t wait for Ian McShane to make us nervous all over again. We get a little gooseflesh just thinking about Swearengen.

"Friday Night Lights" Hasn't Been Paid By Austin, TX

Jake Kalish — Tue, 17 Feb 2009 17:25:00 GMT

When Friday Night Lights debuted, NBC signed a contract with Austin, where the show is filmed, for the city to pay the modest sum of $40,000 a year to the show, provided the show met the terms of a contract. The show hasn't complied with some of those terms - such as having 21 episodes a season, saying "filmed in Austin, TX," in the credits every year, hiring 75% of its cast and crew from the Austin area, and submitting paperwork for all this in a timely fashion. Friday Night Lights has not done all these things exactly right - and, as a consequence, Austin has not paid a dime. Which, one Austin mayoral hopeful says, is totally missing the point:

Candidate Carole Keeton Strayhorn is blasting the City of Austin for not paying any of the money it offered the NBC show in a 2007 incentive deal.

"City staff and the City Council have been dragging their feet on this, looking at the letter of the contract rather than the intent," she said. "Our focus ought to be on protecting the future of 'Friday Night Lights' and projects like it. They boost our economy, and we need those dollars right now."

Sounds about right. You've got one of the great shows on TV being filmed in your city, you want to encourage that show to stay and others like it to come, and you haven't paid 120 grand because of some technicalities? Here's what the hold-up's about:

NBC is required to submit two-page reports proving it met those terms. City staffers and an independent third party then verify the information, which can take a few months, said Rodney Gonzales, acting director of the city's Economic Growth Department.

But the show didn't submit reports for the first and second seasons until September and December 2008, and the forms were incomplete, Gonzales said. (The city has money for the payments, despite a current budget crunch, he said.)

NBC filmed 22 episodes in the first season, 15 in the second and 13 in the third. It didn't include an Austin credit in the second-season shows. And of the cast and crew that NBC has provided information on, too few live in the Austin area, Gonzales said.

Gonzales said he and his staff have called and met with a producer and an NBC lawyer several times to try to resolve the issue.

He said he has asked NBC to provide more addresses for crew and cast members and to explain in writing why it couldn't film 21 episodes or air the credits.

"We are thrilled that the show is filmed in Austin. But we take our compliance reviews very seriously," Gonzales said.

Gaaaahhhhhh! Way to discourage people from filming in your city over some bureaucratic bullshit, Rodney Gonzales.

PREVIOUSLY:

Gaius Charles Blogs His Final "Friday Night Lights" Episode

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NBC Goes After War Criminals

Olivia Purnell — Wed, 11 Feb 2009 19:00:00 GMT

The network that brought you Chris Hansen’s on Dateline's To Catch a Predator has decided to take it up a notch.

NBC News is using the same ethically questionable and legally ambiguous Hansen prescribed tactics to hunt and confront war criminals. Although producers have focused on at least four subjects (in apparent cooperation with the Rwandan government), only the case of Leopold Munyakazi, a professor at Goucher College, has been released to the public.

According to The New York Times, the NBC news team, in the company of a Rwandan prosecutor, confronted Munyakazi, Goucher’s president, Sanford J. Ungar, and the director of communications, Kate Pipkin with allegations of Munyakazi’s involvement in genocide.

Both The Human Rights Watch and the Department of Homeland Security have raised concerns about NBC’s involvement in cases concerning war crimes, and their collaboration with the Rwandan government.

NBC, listen, “To Catch a Predator,” didn’t turn out so good. Remember? That guy shot himself, and all those cases had to be overturned based on your apparent entrapment of the predators. Maybe we should stop playing with the scales of justice for a while and focus on reporting. Just a suggestion.

Previously:

Dateline’s “To Catch a Predator” Should Probably Be Renamed “To Catch and Release a Predator”

Nick Cannon Will Host "America's Got Talent"

Jake Kalish — Mon, 09 Feb 2009 21:05:00 GMT

Surprisingly, former host Jerry Springer looks exactly like this with his shirt off...

Mariah Carey's hubby Nick Cannon has been tabbed to host NBC's America's Got Talent, replacing Springer. What's weird is that Cannon is described as a "musician, comedian, actor and producer", which we suppose is technically true, kinda. But it makes it sound like Cannon himself has a lot more talent than he actually does.Whatever, he's got a winning personality, oodles of money, a six-pack, and now a gig as a host on network TV, all by 28. That's already pretty good.

PREVIOUSLY:

Jerry Springer Bails On "America's Got Talent"

Barack Obama Will Be Interviewed By Everyone Today

Jake Kalish — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 15:10:00 GMT

Today, at the White House's request, the President will sit down for separate interviews with the anchors of ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, and Fox News. Seriously, everybody's talking to Barack today. We've heard a rumor that the hosts of an Aurora, Illinois public access show have a sitdown with Obama at noon.

The interviews will be broadcast throughout the day and evening. Gosh, this President certainly does things differently than his predecessor, doesn't he?

PREVIOUSLY:

Our Barack Obama Archive

Amy Poehler's Sitcom Promo: Go On, Throw Us A Bone

Lindy Parker — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 21:20:00 GMT

Who doesn't need a little more Amy Poehler in their lives? Here's the promo for her new show Parks and Recreation on NBC...

Video: Popwatch

Previously:

New Mama Amy Poehler is Psyched About Her New Show...And Her Kid

Office Spinoff: Amy Poehler Has a Sidekick, and Her Name is Amy Plaza