We've got to say, for hometown week, we saw relatively little of the actual hometowns. In fact, we saw more of the past contestant's hometowns during last week's preparatory montage. Guess that fourth judge time crunch is really putting the pressure on the Fox producers to get off the air on time. Ryan's promising more extensive hometown coverage tomorrow, but by now we're starting to feel weird for making such a big deal of this so we're just going to let it go.
This week each contestant will sing two songs: one chosen by the judges, one chosen by themselves. To us, this means one thing: Twice the Adam...
Judges' choice...
Danny Gokey -- Seriously. What is Paula thinking? Not only does "Dance Little Sister" fully lend itself to the kind of cheesy, Vegas, lounge performance, which Danny seems to love, but which make us want to die, it's also not the type of song that the average viewer is likely to love. Also, Danny's performance was cringeworthy at best. Randy disagrees -- he thinks Danny was jumping off. Kara claims to be uncomfortable with Danny's gyrating, but we think she's just more covert about her crush on Danny than Paula is. Paula tries to interrupt Kara, Simon tries to strangle Paula -- we leave the room in a fit of annoyance.
Kris Allen -- Kris couldn't seem less psyched to receive the news that Randy and Kara have picked "Apologize" by One Republic, but as he only has one facial expression it's hard to say for sure. On the upside, "Apologize" is nowhere near as painful as Danny's "Dance Little Sister," but then, there's still another song to go and it's early days. Simon takes a shot at Kara for failing Kris on the arrangement, Kara loses her mind. The whole thing's awkward and Ryan tries to sift through the wreckage, searching for meaning.
Adam Lambert -- First of all, Adam looks HOT in that shirt (what is it, denim?). Predictably, Adam blows the judges minds with his version of "One" by U2. Simon's drowning in his own smugness. Weirdly, Kara's taunting Simon for his earlier pot shot, but only serves to make herself look both ridiculous and crazy. Paula declares Adam the American Idol, which we're sure makes Kris and Danny feel great about themselves. As for us, we're counting the seconds until Adam's next song.
Also, since this is likely to be our last Idol post to the Remote
Island, we hope you'll allow us a moment to gloat: We totally called
this from day one.
On to the contestant's choice...
Danny Gokey -- From the very first moment that Danny announces his song choice ("You are So Beautiful" by Joe Cocker), we start to feel a bit ill. Undeniably, Danny can sing. But if we're being honest, we haven't really enjoyed a Danny song since "Kiss From a Rose on the Grave" in Hollywood week. Randy can bluster all he wants about "Mad vocals! Mad vocals! Mad vocals!" but we are definitely over it. That said, we'd definitely rather see him in the finale over Kris. Sidenote: why does Danny have a pseudo-Southern accent if he's from Milwaukee?
Kris Allen -- Kris takes a gamble with an unorthodox version of Kanye West's "Heartless." Weirdly, we're kind of into it at first. We know, it's shocking given our dislike for both Kris and Kanye West, but we can't help it -- it's SO wrong, it's almost right. Tragically, our positive feelings only last for about ten seconds, and we're back to questionable. Randy likes Kris more than Kanye. We don't know what to say about that. Kara's effusive, over the top praise seems to be annoying Paula's who's used to being Gushy McGusherton all by herself.
Adam Lambert -- We are totally beside ourselves. We love both Adam and Aerosmith. We feel like we should leave it there or risk sounding as gushy as Kara. The judges are at once hypnotized by Adam's charisma and terrified that America will assume he's a shoo-in and neglect to vote for him. Simon ends the night with a plea to the voters on Adam's behalf.
Verdict: We're actively mourning the Allison/Adam finale that never was.
Previously:
American Idol: Adam Lambert Gets Bumrushed By Shirtless Girl [VIDEO]
WTF, EW?
American Idol: Break Another Little Piece of My Heart
American Idol: Rock Your Body
American Idol: The Piano Man
American Idol: Rat Pack Brats
