The Remote Island

"90210": Signs and Wonders

Posted by Lindy Parker

 

It's springtime in Beverly Hills, and the April showers are bringing more drama than the Candy/Tori Spelling feud.  Let's get to those ups and downs...

Happy: Naomi and Annie are giving the best friendship that never was another chance, primarily fueled by their shared love of fooseball.

Sad: So far, Tori Spelling's encore performance on 90210 feels a bit like an impersonation of herself.  Maybe if they brought David back, she could recapture the magic?  Think about it, BAG.

Happy: Donna decides that the best way to determine whether or not her marriage to David is a wash is to consult psychic-to-the-stars with an accent of unknown origin.  Tragically, Madame Flannigan's lips are sealed about Donna's future, but she's a wealth of information about Kelly's future love interest -- right down to his six pack.

Sad: Naomi's pulling out all the stops in pursuit of carnal knowledge of Liam. Sadly, Liam seems more interested in pursuing a Daniel-san/Mr. Miagi bromance with Ethan.  

Happy: The Wilsons are having a yard sale, Kansas-style, and you know, we love a yard sale.   

Sad: Kelly and Donna who have lived their entire lives in Beverly Hills are completely at a loss when it comes to hip night spots.  Luckily, some friendly, lesbian passersby mistake them for lovers and send them to the nearest gay bar.  Kelly and Donna decide to go with it, but in an awkward "let's just pretend we're lesbians" kind of way.

Happy: Naomi's dad is being sued for sexual harassment, and tries to force Naomi to move back in with 

Sad: Apparently, the Ethan/Liam bromance isn't going to go anywhere since we haven't seem either of them since before the title sequence.

Happy: Navid's helping DDG pick an adoptive couple for her baby.  He knows which vitamins are good for pre-natal development, and he just proposed to DDG over biggers at the Peach Pit.  We love Navid.  Thank God he has enough money to make this teen marriage thing work...probably.

Sad: Silver's wearing the scarlet C for "crazy" around her friends.  Weirdly, DDG seems the most judge-y.  Strange from a girl who OD'd on drugs, slept with half of Beverly Hills, went to rehab and came out pregnant.  Silver's enrolling at a local Catholic school to get away from the pressure.

Happy: Kelly runs into Ryan in the 7-11 holding a six-pack of beer and decides that's good enough for her.  

Verdict:  We don't like these David/Donna marriage problems y'all.  Their love was REAL...

Previously:

90210: Donna and Diablo

90210: [SPOILER] is Getting The Axe

Top Five Things We'd Like To See When 90210 Returns

 Is Shannen Doherty the Most Successful Beverly Hills, 90210 Cast Member?

90210: Not So Happy Accidents


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Posted Apr 22 2009, 05:00 PM
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About Lindy Parker

Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She now writes for nerve.com's TV blog, "The Remote Island." She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

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    Lindy Parker has worked as a ghostwriter, editor, dance instructor and a purveyor of dreams, one beer at a time. She loves Charles Dickens and Gabriel Garcia Marquez and also, straight-to-video releases with Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. It's possible she reads more teen fiction than she should. She hails from Los Angeles, her hometown and soul mate, but she lives in Brooklyn, the fling she'll never forget.

    Olivia Purnell left Ohio for sunny Los Angeles; then found that she couldn’t ignore New York City’s call, and brought herself to Brooklyn where she has worked with GenArt, BlackBook, the School of American Ballet, and finished an M.A. in Creative Writing from N.Y.U. She loves one-liners with sting and hates the stench of the subway in the summer. That said, she can’t get enough of either.

    Jake Kalish is a freelance journalist and humorist whose work has appeared in Details, Maxim, Stuff, New York Press, Spin, Blender, Men's Fitness, Poets and Writers, and Playboy, among other publications. He is also the author of Santa vs. Satan: The Official Compendium of Imaginary Fights.

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