We were on the subway earlier today, having a morning coffee, wondering about how many germs we encounter on a daily basis via the hang-on pole (a lot, that’s how many) when we suddenly realized, Beyonce has taken over the planet. On our right, three junior high girls were practicing the patented “Put a Ring On It” booty-pop, presumably for drill team or a church pageant. On our left, a thirty-something lady was watching the Single ladies video on her ipod. Across the way, a balding man was bouncing his head, mouthing “Don’t be mad when he say that he want it . . .”
Listen, we are not mad. Beyoncitus is thoroughly contagious. She's everywhere, shaking her beautiful behind and sanging about empowerment through jewelry. This holiday season, Beyonce has single-handedly gifted us with enough television and youtube fodder to last well into 2009. So, to pay homage to Miss B, here are the top five Single Ladies videos.
Behold, the Beyonce Revolution:
5. Saturday Night Live’s “The Dancers” sketch. Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake as back up dancers. Paul Rudd as the nepotistic director. And Beyonce as herself. Honestly Beyonce’s comedic timing leaves something to be desired. But, JT in a leotard whispering, “we’re the dancers,” through pursed lips is enough to crack us up every time.
4. Beyonce’s American Music Awards performance. She works hard for the money. Don’t throw a hip out girl! P.S. that ponytail weave is soooooo Sasha fierce.
3. Beyonce does Tyra. Okay, this performance is extra special. First of all, the male back up dancers are too diva for words. It’s like Beyonce reached back in time to a C+C Music Factory video and plucked the best of the best for Tyra. And, let’s not even talk about Tyra’s facial expressions/intonation/dance moves. It’s all too much. Too. Much.
2. The Single Man doing Single Ladies. This guy is so serious in his Fifth Element onsie. Two points for that black leg garter thing. Attention to detail is so important.
1. The Gwen Verdon Fosse video. Now obvi, this isn’t a Beyonce inspired vid. The Gwen Verdon "Mexican Breakfast" piece was the inspiration for the Single Ladies music video. But miraculously after the Single Ladies phenomenon, some genius set the original Gwen V to "Walk It Out." Oh, it’s glorious. We never tire of this clip.
Please let us know if there’s anyway we will ever be that fly. Should we purchase a polyester pantsuit? Should we hot roll our hair? How in Fosse’s blessed name can we be as flossy as Gwen Verdon? How?
