Here it is, the final part of our Unwatchable halftime celebration. This is the post you want to bookmark, because from here you can access all the Unwatchable entries so far. What better way to kill a slow Friday afternoon at work? Once you’ve devoured them all, your excitement for new Unwatchable material will be at a fever pitch…so I am delighted (more or less) to announce that next week is Unwatchable Week here at the Screengrab. Yes, there will be an all-new Unwatchable entry each day next week as we begin our assault on the top half of the IMDb Bottom 100 list. At least, that’s the plan. It’s easy for me to say that now, of course. We’ll see if I can actually pull it off.

In the meantime, here are another ten classics from the vault. Enjoy my pain!

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Welcome back to the Unwatchable Halftime Report. We’re getting ready to tackle the 50 worst movies the Internet Movie Database has to offer, but before we get there, let’s take a little breather and survey the wreckage we’ve left in our path. Yesterday we checked out Unwatchables 91-100, so let’s move on up to the next ten.

90. The Bat People. “If The Bat People is notable at all (hint: it’s not), it’s as one of makeup guru Stan Winston’s earliest efforts, though I suspect he’d leave it off his resume if the IMDb didn’t exist. When we finally get a full view of the transformed John, he looks less like a bat than an extra who stole a mask from the set of the Planet of the Apes TV series.”

89. Bloodlust! “The exclamation point means extra thrills! At least, I wish it did.”

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Hey, kids. Frosty the Snowman here. I gotta say, I’m not feeling the love from the Screengrab this holiday season. I was certain this week would see their Top 10 List of Greatest Snowman Movies Ever. After all, there are so many great ones to choose from. Who doesn’t shed a tear every year during their annual viewing of Jack Frost, the heartwarming tale of Michael Keaton becoming a snowman and learning to be a better dad? And then there’s, uh, the other Jack Frost, about the mutant killer snowman, and its sequel, Jack Frost 2: Revenge of the Mutant Killer Snowman.

But no, instead we get this list of The Best and Worst Stage-to Screen Adaptations of All Time (Parts One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven and Eight). What does that have to do with snowmen? And even when they do acknowledge the Christmas season, as in the 12 Days of Christmas Marathon (Bad Santa and The Star Wars Holiday Special) or Yesterday’s Hits: The Santa Clause, my brothers in snow get nary a mention.

Still, I’m willing to rise above it all and point out a few of my favorite posts of the week, if only they’ll turn up the air conditioning in here.

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Our fearless – and quite possibly senseless – movie janitor is watching every movie on the IMDb Bottom 100 list. Join us now for another installment of Unwatchable.

Anyone who knows me will tell you there are two things I love above all others: baseball and monkey movies. So it would only stand to reason that Ed, in which Friends doofus Matt LeBlanc befriends a baseball-playing chimpanzee, would be my favorite movie of all time. This turns out not to be the case. The filmmakers appear to know very little about baseball and even less about what makes a successful monkey movie. You may say to me, “Scott Von Doviak, you heartless, childless bastard! This is a movie for kids! Lay off!” I can only warn all my friends with young children: Do not show Ed to your kids. It will make them stupid and turn them into violent criminals. If you do show Ed to your kids, don’t tell me about it or I will be forced to call the Department of Social Services.

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Our fearless – and quite possibly senseless – movie janitor is watching every movie on the IMDb Bottom 100 list. Join us now for another installment of Unwatchable.

This entry requires a bit of an explanation. As I’ve mentioned before, the IMDb Bottom 100 list is a fluid entity. There is no single version of this list because you, the loyal bad movie viewer, alter it every time you cast your vote. I am working from a version I downloaded two months ago when I began this project, and although that list may have many crapulescent movies in common with the current version, they may rank higher or lower on the list – and of course, many entries have since been supplanted by fresh, steaming piles from the cineplex.

So why am I telling you this? Well, for the first time since I began the Unwatchable project, a Bottom 100 entry has defeated me. I don’t mean I couldn’t get through the movie – that would be antithetical to everything I stand for – I mean I couldn’t find the movie at all.

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