"I Broke My Dick And It Made Shatner A Star"

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 14:37:00 GMT

Christopher Plummer told PageSix a sex story so bizarrely hilarious that we were forced to lift our own ban on linking to the New York Post to share it with you...

The movie star has a new autobiography out in which, according to the gossip rag we love to hate, he tells the following story about gearing up to play Henry V on stage in 1956, a role for which William Shatner was the understudy. (Note that just before the excerpt begins, Plummer has just had a wild one night stand with an unnamed woman...)

"I woke up alone the next morning... (pain) all around my groin and lower abdomen... I started to whimper like a whipped dog. 'So this is what syphilis is like?' I thought. 'I suppose I deserve it, but Christ, how the hell was I to know?'
But instead of being struck down by the disease, Plummer had dislodged a kidney stone and had to undergo a medical procedure with a surgical wire to resolve the problem.
He adds, "It began to sink in... Shatner, my understudy, would have to go on... (It) instantly brought back the pain. I screamed for a nurse who jabbed me with more morphine.
"I knew then that the S.O.B. was going to be a 'star.'" [WENN-- see, we avoided the Post]

Ooh, scandalous! It almost would make more sense of Plummer had contracted syphillis because it would explain his insane assertion that William Shatner became famous for a 1950s stage play by Billy Shakes. Everybody knows it was his rockin' version of "Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds."

Right?

Related:

That Slut America Totally Gave Europe VD

Bryan Christian — Wed, 16 Jan 2008 13:03:00 GMT

The controversy surrounding the flowering of syphilis in the late 15th century may have been solved -- and it looks as though we might owe an awkward phone call to our friends across the Atlantic.

A new study provides what scientists say is the most convincing evidence to date that the Italian adventurer [Christopher Columbus] and some of his crew contracted the disease during their voyage to the New World—and unwittingly introduced it to the old one circa 1493.

Way to ruin Fleet Week 2008, stupid scientists!

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