Scanner : swedish

New Mom Dropped By Insurer For Being Slightly Overweight

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 14 May 2009 16:04:00 GMT

The insurance company worried that it would have to take care of children like the ones picture above, based on no evidence other than the mother they were carrying tipped the scales at over 200 pounds.

Anna Holten is a 26-year-old Swedish woman. She stands at about 5' 4" (169cm) and weighs about 220 pounds (100 kg), giving her a BMI of 35. Apparently, this was too much for her insurance company, which dropped her to great public controversy...

Upon learning of her rejection, Holten contacted the Trygg-Hansa risk analyst to explain that she was still trying to work off the weight she gained while pregnant.

“You should have lost the weight by now,” the analyst told her.

According to Trygg-Hansa product manager Björn Sporrong, people with a BMI of 35 are “extremely overweight” and right at his company’s limit for granting coverage.

“Exceedingly overweight people run a significantly higher risk for suffering from many serious diseases,” he told Expressen.

Trygg-Hansa spokesperson Malou Sjörin concurred.

“Even if you’re not sick today, you can be in the future,” Sjörin told the Metro newspaper.

These people wouldn't be able to find anyone to insure if they moved to America-- 220 pounds at 5' 4" is barely considered "overweight" in some states. But that doesn't mean they were wrong to drop Ms. Holden, mother of a seven-month-old baby... or does it?

Via the Local.

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Coke Ad Offends the Entire Country of Sweden

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 19:33:00 GMT

Maybe we're being extra sensitive coming off the Bust Party last night, but sexism is definitely making a comeback on this Friday afternoon.

First, there was the 6 Tips on Cheating With Multiple Girlfriends list link. Then comes word that Sweden-- as a whole-- is fed up with Coca-Cola's sexist ads. We wish they would take on all sexist advertising while they're at it...

Here's the ad that has the country in an uproar:

According to the Local, Sweden's must-read (online!) newspaper, ad agency watchdogs in the great European nation have attacked Coke for treating women as "purely sex objects."

But what offended the person who filed the complaint was the fact that, if a number of questions posed on the website are answered in a certain way, the woman is suddenly standing near a bed wearing only a bra and panties.

While Coca-Cola chose not to comment on that specific aspect of the internet ad campaign, it explained that the website was supposed to create an image of how life should be.

So, Coke thinks life should involve stripper harems, dishonest breakups, superficial relationships, and "diet" soda that tastes like pond water? Oh, and did Coke happen to see this post, which we linked to this morning? Wonder what they think of that kind of "life."

Via the Local.

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Not All Swedes Are Hot

Colleen Kane — Tue, 13 Jan 2009 16:20:00 GMT

You might not want to believe it, but evidence has just emerged indicating that Sweden did have some fuggs in the 1970s. As punishment for their genetic failure, these outcasts were put in dance bands and forced to dress alike in Technicolor Spandex versions of high-school band uniforms.

Let's take a look at some more!

These guys are a close-knit group. But there's a reason (moose knuckle) they put old Beardy Svensson in the front there.

This one was started by Kenny Rogers fanatics.

And here we have HiCK, starring: The Hick.

You know who I'm talking about.

Just note the band name for this next one.

I also took the liberty of creating a Swedish Dance Band Supergroup. They are called SuperSvenska. Here's the lineup:

Bengt

Someone's hippy dad, Far

Andreas, the ego of the operation

This guy, who I like to call LOLsson

And don't forget The Swedish Hick.

See the whole treasure trove at Yemii Pics.

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Today in Sweden: Teen Sex For Booze On The Rise

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 14:40:00 GMT

The percentage of people trading sex for booze is on the rise in the U.S. and Canada, especially among former Brady Bunch stars.

Now a truly oblivious police department in Sweden wants to warn teens about trading sex for booze... as some guys would like to have sex with you in exchange for the booze. Thank you, Lieutenant Obvious...

Police in Stockholm, Sweden are concerned about what they perceive to be a rise in teenage girls offering their bodies to creepy men who are lurking outside liquor stores, hoping teenage girls will offer up their bodies. Police also say these teens are arranging sex by-- breaking news, people!-- text messages and a newfangled invention called the internet, which is apparently a ripoff of the Bulletin Board System.

Seriously, these cops are freaking out over one case in which a guy convicted of sexual harassment and for possessing child pornography bought three sixteen-year-old girls a stockpile of liquor and then brought them back to their place. No word on whether these teenagers (who were dumb enough to not rip the guy off and just take off running with their booze) were molested, but no matter...

Word to Swedish police: this practice has been going on since the advent of moonshine, and probably even before that. Telling teenagers not to do something only encourages them-- you should instead put up posters of very hairy older men saying, "Yes, we'd love to buy you a six pack... but you'll have to spend an hour in my World of Warcraft sex dungeon first." That should take care of the problem right quick...

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Do You Want To Watch Weird Swedes Put On Condoms?

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 25 Nov 2008 16:14:00 GMT

Full-blown sexual mania has descended over the great country of Sweden, and with it, those who fear honesty and openness in our society have swooped in to muck things up for the rest of us.

According to The Local, our favorite daily news source in the entire world (since it's chock full of sex-- even more obsessed with it than The Sun), a public transit ad asking "Do you want to see us put on a condom?" has been banned because it made whiny old geezers uncomfortable. Or something. The ad

is part of a campaign for UMO.se, a new web-based helpline for young people.

[It] features two young men and provides a text messaging code which allows people to download a short film featuring a tongue in cheek demonstration of how to put on a condom.

According to Västtrafik, the ad has been banned because it could be considered offensive, reports the newspaper Metro.

Wait, because it could be considered offensive? No one actually complained? It was just you, wasn't it, Vasttrafik, you closeted virgin. Or maybe... closeted homosexual. After all, the ad featured two men (see above/top right photo) and not the now-approved followup ad, featuring only a female, who asks, "Do you want to see me do something I like?"

Yes, but it also involves a condom...

Via The Local.

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Now Sweden Has Its Very Own Orgasm Church

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 21 Nov 2008 16:46:00 GMT

A Swedish court handed down a decision last week acknowledging that The Madonna of Orgasm Church (the other Madonna) had a right to registration as a faith organization, which, according to news reports, is some sort of slap in the face to Christians...

Originally, the Legal, Financial and Administrative Services Agency (Kammarkollegiet) had refused the church’s registration application on the grounds that its name may offend Christians.

What, because of the word Madonna? Man, those freaks need to get over themselves.

According to the Skånska Dagbladet newspaper, the idea for the church came to Bebeacua, who is the church’s self-appointed cardinal, after a painting of his entitled 'The Madonna of Orgasm' sparked protests requiring police action during the 1992 World’s Fair in Seville, Spain.

“The orgasm is God, the orgasm should be worshiped,” Bebeacua told the Kvällsposten newspaper.

“The orgasm is the ultimate feeling of lust, it shouldn’t be limited to ejaculation. You can reach it through art or by looking at a landscape and thinking ‘Wow!’”

Bebeacua says his church has a few hundred followers, but we beg to differ: it's more like hundreds of millions, all of whom would probably welcome climaxing via landscape, if only we could figure out how the hell that's going to happen...

Via the Local.

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Bestiality Bust Is Our Favorite Swedish Sex Story Ever

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 16:40:00 GMT

We know Scanner Emily mentioned this yesterday, but it's way to good not to blog about in full.

A 45-year-old father of two was exposed by the Swedish newspaper the Expressen for running a bestiality ring that allegedly includes thirty members. But it's not the sex ring or the fact that a newspaper was the one to blow the lid off this thing (instead of the cops, that is) that caused us to sit up and drop our bagels...

Daddy who, thank God, is not married to the mother of those poor children of his, is a farmer (surprise) who owns dogs, horses, and an internet forum for bestiality lovers. Whoops. Somehow, the Expressen managed to infiltrate his underground harem and, after what must have been an unbearable couple of months, confronted the guy, who remains nameless-- because, well, you'll see...

But the man was quick to defend his relations with a bitch he bought online from a city-dwelling family who said they wanted the dog to have a better life in the countryside.

"Any of the times I did anything with her she was the one who backed into me and provoked it. She was in heat and made herself available. There were also times later when she didn't want to and then I backed out immediately," he told Expressen.

Now you see why we love this story? Who the hell does this guy think he is, with the "she seduced me" argument? Oh, right, he's a leader of a large bestiality ring in Sweden. Got it.

It gets worse/better, depending on how much you're sickened or appreciating this insanity? The Expressen's investigator was forced to sit through a regular group meeting, for which members brought a variety of animals to show off, as well as video recordings of their pets in... never mind. Barf.

By the way, the reason we, the Local, and the Expressen cannot name this name? No, it's not because he's innocent until proven guilty-- he's completely innocent, at least in the eyes of the law, since Sweden has no law against bestiality.

"Is it, and should it be, legal to spread something on the genitalia that might smell or taste nice to a dog, in order to allow the dog to lick off whatever is spread on the genitalia?

"Should it be permitted to stroke a bitch's teats with love, or should it be classified as animal sexual abuse?" the minister wondered. [The Local]

Dude, that's the Minister of Agriculture talking. And you thought Sweden was awesome...

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And You Thought Swedish Women Only Made the News for Wearing Bikinis

Nicole Pasulka — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 18:12:00 GMT

These crazy Swedish twins don't even need to take their clothes off or have sex with each other to go wild...

The video of these two nut-jobs running maniacally into traffic three times is the most insane thing we've seen in a while. The ladies make Amy Winehouse look like Princess Di.

Swedish Boarding School Initiates Sex Games For New Students

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 15 Sep 2008 17:22:00 GMT

Have we mentioned how much we love Sweden? First, many of its young ladies enjoy having sex with one another. It's also in Europe, somewhere, so that's helpful.

Seriously, this new story from Sweden, which involves boarding school students, sex games, bananas, and chocolate make take the, um, cake...

It seems that for the new autumn semester of Riksbasket Gymnasiet, a boarding school for students who are more focused on basketball than school books, the new students got a welcoming party they hadn't bargained for.

“In one game boys had their upper bodies covered in chocolate and the girls had to lick it off,” said Ewa Lundström, principle for sports high schools in Luleå, to Sveriges Radio.
“In another game the girls were lying on the floor with a banana in their mouth while the boys did pushups on top of them and ate the bananas,” said Lundström.

Of course, school officials are ruining all the fun by launching a full investigation into the serious, serious matter. Students, meanwhile, are probably realizing that they need to tighten the ranks to the most trustworthy friends, who aren't likely to snitch, and then at least try to get more creative about their initiation methods.

We recommend ice cubes on a hot day, a la Do The Right Thing.

Via The Local.

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Swedish Prostitutes Complain: "We Wanna Pay Taxes, Too!"

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 09 Sep 2008 14:58:00 GMT

In an announcement sure to explode the heads of Rush Limbaugh-John McCains everywhere, people in other countries are so happy with the government and its system of sick pay, family leave, and pensions. More importantly, it's the prostitutes that are all gung ho to shell out for those benefits...

While it remains against the law to purchase sex in Sweden, selling sex is perfectly legal according to Sweden’s unique prostitution law, which came into force in 1999.

These laws are crazier than New York's... or Texas's...

Income recorded on prostitutes’ tax returns gives them the right to sick-leave pay, parental leave benefits, and a pension.

“It’s important to pay taxes if you want to live a normal life,” said ‘Lisa’, a prostitute who spoke with the newspaper.

But Christian Democrat Riksdag member Désirée Pethrus Engström thinks that legitimizing prostitution by collecting taxes on the proceeds sends the wrong message.

Dude, it's already legal... man, some people will do anything to get other people out of paying taxes. Wake up, conservatives! Some people aren't looking forward to apocalyptic anarchy when you drown government in the bathtub... like these ladies:

Via The Local.

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Swedes Get High On Nutmeg, End Up In Hospital For Cake Overload...

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 14:20:00 GMT

We want to thank the Freakonomics blog for informing us that we can actually get high on nutmeg... although the hospitalization part that happened to these Swedish magazine readers is not really part of our agenda this weekend...

Tens of thousands of copies of a Swedish food magazine have been recalled this week after an error in an apple cake recipe sent four of its readers to the hospital with nutmeg poisoning.

The recipe should have called for two pinches of nutmeg. Instead, the magazine went to press telling chefs to use 20 whole nutmeg nuts. That was enough nutmeg for at least four adults to seek medical help for headaches and dizziness.

In large doses, nutmeg is a mild hallucinogen.

Mild or otherwise, it's better than the stuff the guy in 3B has been leaving in our mailbox...

"There was a mistake in a recipe for apple cake..." Matmagasinet's chief editor Ulla Cocke told Agence France-Presse. [ABC News]

Although we're pretty sure none of our readers subscribe, just be warned: the name of the magazine is Matmagsinet.... However, should anyone want to fix us up an LSD cake, as accidentally recommended here, we accept deliveries at the Nerve address all day...

via Freakonomics.

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Boob Watch: Swedish Topless Crusaders Still At It

Bryan Christian — Wed, 02 Apr 2008 18:01:00 GMT

Jeez Louise, we are all for boobs getting free of their restraints -- whereever in the world -- but seriously, haven't these gals Ragnhild and Kristin been shoving their ta-tas in everyone's faces enough? We've written about them twice before, and dammit, we're gettin' a little sick of them. Yes, we know, they're incrementally securing the right to show your young female body in the Orwellian nightmare that is Sweden, and now they're inspiring other girls to do the same in The Netherlands. But can someone just, like, wake us up when R & K are leading a band of naked victorious nymphets across the Atlantic Ocean or something?

[img and copy via]