Scanner : suicide girls

Suicide Girls Get Bromantic Tattoos @ SXSW

Colleen Kane — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 19:05:00 GMT

Three of us Scanners (Emily, Brian, and yours truly) are at South by Southwest this week, though we have yet to convene. However, we do have some SXSW-related sexy lady news to report, naturally.

Two Suicide Girls, Lynn LaValee and Jessica Zollman, celebrated their upcoming roommate-dom here in Austin by getting new matching tatts themed after their shared love for a certain favorite-on-the-Internet food item...

Bacon.

Here's Jessica's self-portrait.

And here's Lynn's bicep's bacon + grease.

Jessica told the L.A. Times, "Raw meat, sexuality, food -- I think they all go hand in hand."

Related:

Suicide Girls Rated "F" by Better Business Bureau

SuicideGirls.com Lays Off Bloggers, Including Ensign Wesley Crusher

Celebrity Ink: Angelina Jolie's Tattoos Look Really Great Next to Her Breasts

Images: Jay Zombie's flickr & twitter, L.A.Times blogs

Paris' BFF Finale Night: Awk-waaaaard

Colleen Kane — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 23:02:00 GMT

If you're as unnaturally enthusiastic about the Paris Hilton: Be My New BFF show as us, you surely didn't miss last night's Reunion Special- Finale Show- Aftershow trifecta. And what you couldn't have missed if you did watch the back-to-back BFF attack was how strange it all was. Let us count the ways.

The Reunion Special featured:

A tattooed and guylinered audience apparently recruited from the queue for a My Chemical Romance concert
Action that was edited out when Natasha called video director Chris Applebaum the biggest bitch of all and he immediately left in what might have been a huff (good, that bitch deserved it), then [scene missing] suddenly Natasha is trashing the cardboard Bitch-O-Meter
A contrived revenge sequence in which Baje reveals she swished (pun intended) Onch's lip gloss applicator in the toilet, right as Onch just so happens to be applying his lip gloss. What a coinkydink!
A contrived fight between Zui and Bikini Corrie about how they both take off their clothes for money

The Finale featured:

Bizarre matching Marie Antoinette minidress getups for the two remaining contestants with no explanation until the final scene, which takes place at a masquerade ball
Vanessa asking Brittany to give up her seat next to Paris on the plane so she can stare adoringly at her while she sleeps
Vanessa describing how she and Paris do BFF things together like fall asleep on each other's shoulders, but when they show the footage of said scene, Vanessa had put her head on Paris' shoulder with no reciprocation
Vanessa generally appearing creepier than ever in her psycho-phantic desperation to be Paris' BFF: "Every second counts now. Like, every single second." [crazed smile, crazed eyes]
About 45 minutes of either Paris and Brittany or Paris and Vanessa awkwardly assuring each other what a great time they were having and how happy they are to be getting to know each other

The Aftershow featured:

Nick Swardson, aka rollerhomo Terry from Reno 911 playing his least festive role ever: himself as Paris' friend.
I watched it, but I'm still not really sure what else happened. I think it was a half hour of Paris & Pals lying on a bed talking BFF talk.

Paris Hilton Pulls the Bullshit Train to Toronto

Who Would You Rather... for President: Paris or Palin?

SuicideGirls.com Lays Off Bloggers, Including Ensign Wesley Crusher

Bryan Christian — Thu, 03 Jan 2008 14:30:00 GMT

More indication of trouble in SuicideGirlLand, as SG blogger and former child star Wil Wheaton reports that he has been let go as a blogger by the embattled alt.porn site.

Due to budget cuts at the Newswire, this will be the last Geek in Review. It’s been an awesome year, but all good things must come to an end, and I think the GiR will be very happy living on a farm where it can play with other columns all day long.

We have no idea what that means, but Boinkology reports that Wheaton isn't the only blogger to get the axe. Noted comics writer and weekend contributor Warren Ellis has also been given the heave-ho, along with "the bulk of [SG's] writing staff." Budget cuts are blamed all around, with our reaction to that being similar to Boinkology commenter "A": "More money for the lawyers..."

Previously: Suicide Girls Rated "F" by Better Business Bureau

[Via Fleshbot]

Suicide Girls Rated "F" by Better Business Bureau

Bryan Christian — Mon, 26 Nov 2007 20:04:00 GMT

Did you know that the Better Business Bureau takes the time to rate smut sites? We sure as hell didn't. Guess when you're the controversial alt.porn site SuicideGirls.com, and have had a number of public dustups regarding both your content and your business practices, not all the extra attention winds up being good. In this case, it means being graded "F" by the L.A. branch of the leading consumer protection outfit in the country. Oh, btw, that ain't "F" for "foxy."

We strongly question the company’s reliability for reasons such as that they have failed to respond to complaints, their advertising is grossly misleading, they are not in compliance with the law’s licensing or registration requirements, their complaints contain especially serious allegations, or the company’s industry is known for its fraudulent business practices.

Yikes. We're guessing there's more to this than people expecting more "alt" in their "alt.porn."