Scanner : soccer

Footballers Take the Blue Pill

Colleen Kane — Fri, 24 Apr 2009 17:11:00 GMT

Cyclists are known to train in mountainous areas, and other athletes train at high altitutudes to get an extra comptetitve edge, but a football (as in soccer) coach in Bolivia has taken things a step further.

The former phisotherapist of the team Blooming (that's not them above, but this pic is appropriate) revealed a rather unsusual prescription he wrote for at least nine of the players.

Rodrigo Figueora prescribed Viagra to help oxegenate the blood of the players, who hail from Santa Cruz but need to be at peak performance in the capital city of La Paz. Their hometown is at 400m (1,300 feet), while La Paz is at 3,500 m.

The players were unaware they were taking the drug, as it was administrated mixed with fruit juice.

"We prescribed it for several players, especially those who suffered most from altitude," the good doctor said.

And were there any...er...other effects of this Viagra?

"At altitude you win, you draw, you lose. The best results came when the team relied on strong tactical nous."

Related:

My Kind of Protest: Soccer Players Dropping Drawers

Austria Defeats Germany in Topless Women's Football Match

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My Kind of Protest: Soccer Players Dropping Drawers

Colleen Kane — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 22:02:00 GMT

Although I hate sports, I got into the European football matches during their championship matches last summer while traveling abroad. It didn't hurt that a lot of the players were easy on the eyes and constantly showing a little well-toned leg.

In the case of the Spanish soccer team El Galactico Pegoso, they're not afraid to show a little more leg and Speedo-size underwear, either. As you'll see in this local news coverage of the incident, the team dropped trou as a protest* for not getting paid.

This lineup isn't quite as fetching as some from last summer, but you get the idea.

*This protest style would not have looked quite as good if it were used for last winter's writer's strike.

Soccer Pro in Most Boring Sextape Scandal Ever?

World's Greatest Mom Defends Daughter's Honor... Shotgun Style

Via OhLaLaMag

Hot or Not? Victoria Beckham in Armani Underwear

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 16:56:00 GMT

Victoria Beckham has always struck us as the kind of woman Brits go crazy for, but the rest of the world cannot get into. If she weren't married to the top footballer, would the world remember her or would she just fall into obscurity, along with the rest of the Spice Girls?

Having recently signed a 12-million-pound modeling deal, Victoria will definitely be in the public eye on her own a lot more, and, if this keeps up, might be able to win us over...

'There are loads of things I don't like about my body', she said. 'I've got so much saggy skin on my stomach.'
The pictures of Victoria, which will grace billboards and magazines are from her first shoot in the three-year multi-million pound deal.

What do you think of her new Armani campaign? Are we done with her, can we move on?

Photos via Telegraph.

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Carmen Electra's Latest Playboy Shoot Explains Why The Magazine Is Failing

Creepy Dudes Now Using Sex Tapes To Blackmail You Into... Giving Them Nude Photos?

Our Favorite Leftover Photos of 2008

The 5 Hottest Men And 5 Hottest Women Of The 2008 Summer Olympics (Part Two)

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 06 Aug 2008 18:29:00 GMT

Did you catch our hottest women of the Summer Olympics list? Here's part two... the guys...

By the way, we are going to go with almost all American athletes for this one just because it's been harder to find hot athlete dudes on the internet unless you can Google in other languages...

Andrew Campbell for Sailing:

Andrew Rosenthal, Volleyball

Brian McBride, Soccer

Raj Bhavsar, Gymnastics

And Alexander Despatie, the Canadian and world champion diver...

Via Cosmo and our own dirty minds. We welcome your suggestions for replacements or additions to this list in the comments...

See Previous: The 5 Hottest Men And 5 Hottest Women Of The 2008 Summer Olympics (Part One: The Females)

While You Were Sleeping: We'll Score Or Go Topless For You

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:48:00 GMT

Don't you wish America's Next Top Models were making sex tapes, too?

Isn't this entrapment? An Ohio man came upon a topless woman in a park. The woman, noting that the park was empty, asked him to take out his dick. He obliged and was promptly arrested as part of a sting operation.

Did you hear about the naked airplane passenger?

An American Airlines flight from Boston to Los Angeles was diverted to Oklahoma City on Friday after a passenger stripped nude and later tried to open an emergency exit door before being subdued by members of a professional soccer team and others, the FBI said.

If you're going to kill yourself by jumping in front of a train, the least you could do is not traumatize the driver for life by staring into his eyes.

Neil Young talked about living with war (both the album and the state of being) on Charlie Rose. Not news, but you should check it out anyway.

More than 5,000 people donated to a guy running for office in nowhere Kansas after a cartoon about his candidacy took off on the internet. (To put things in perspective: he shattered previous records of only a few hundred people ever donating in such a race.)

An English footballer, scoreless since 2006, has vowed to score

five goals in this season’s push for promotion. If he is not successful then he and the rest of the United first team will get their kit off and pose for a topless calendar with the proceeds going to charity.

Topless soccer players? Come on, dudes... if you were serious, it would be a calendar with the full monty.

Male Mormon Missionaries Go Topless For The Hell Of It

Today in Bad-Assery: The Neil Young Archives, 1963-1972

Lady Streaker Scores a Goooooooooal!

Nicole Pasulka — Wed, 21 May 2008 20:43:00 GMT

Streaker Scores Goal

[We think this might be fake. We don't care.]

David Beckham and Friend Protect Their Balls?

Emily Farris — Tue, 18 Mar 2008 16:51:00 GMT

We'd like to know what David Beckham and his teammate are doing below the belt. Whatever it is, it's kind-of hot.

Are they merely protecting their balls from the ball? Is this normal? They're holding on a little tight, don't you think? We don't watch enough football to know for sure, though.

[Via our not-so-slutty sister FameCrawler]

Video of the Day: If You're Gonna Score, Score Big

Emily Farris — Thu, 31 Jan 2008 21:45:00 GMT

We're not big sports fans, but we do appreciate victory, scoring and celebration. And this video of a football/soccer score totally counts as scoring porn.

via videosift.com

Soccer Pro Sex Scandal Number Two: Now THAT'S More Like It!

Bryan Christian — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 18:56:00 GMT

God bless you, News of the World and soccer superstar Cristiano Ronaldo. There's no video, but nonetheless: you've done us all proud!

Previously: Soccer Pro in Most Boring Sextape Scandal Ever?

Soccer Pro in Most Boring Sextape Scandal Ever?

Bryan Christian — Tue, 15 Jan 2008 13:01:00 GMT

Here at Scanner, we spend every single moment of every single day praying for another sextape scandal. But we will be goddamned if we can get worked up in the slightest bit over the situation that Argentinian soccer pro Ever Banega's found himself in.

In the clip, which carries the title "Banega, grande desde siempre" or "Banega, always big", the player can be seen chatting over his computer with someone for several minutes before committing a sexual act.

We've watched the thing (click through to have a look yourself), and we are here to tell you: boring, boring, boring. If you like cock, well, there's like 6 seconds of boner. And the rest of the six minute clip is... well, if you ever got hot from the end of an episode of Doogie Howser, where Doogie was typing in his diary, boy are you in luck.

Banega just started playing for Spanish team Valencia under a five-and-a-half year, 18 million Euro contract, so it'd be a real shame to let such an underwhelming bit of smut put his livelihood in jeopardy. Today's Scanner Lesson: if you're gonna get caught with a sextape, for crying out loud, make sure someone else is in the tape with you.

Click through to subject yourself to its unparalleled boringness!