Scanner : sex scandal

While You Were Sleeping: Sex Scandal Star Fights Porn

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 04 May 2009 16:34:00 GMT

Bob Dylan has the #1 record in England, making him the oldest musician to ever hold that spot. Although he has had many more top 5 records there than in the United States, it's his first chart-topper since 1970.

Angela Merkel... in her undies?

An eight-year-old girl was finally allowed to divorce her middle-aged husband.

Here's an in-depth look at Masters and Johnson, who may have faked those "gay conversion" studies, as we reported last week.

A look at life under "socialist" European government.

Donna Rice Hughes was half of the sex scandal that doomed Gary Hart's 1988 Presidential campaign. Now, she's back in the spotlight, fighting pornography.

Wanna see someone get waterboarded?

And the Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction case drags on.

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Cheerleading Coach In Hottest Nude Photo Scandal Ever

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 19:20:00 GMT

Channel 13 in Sacramento claims to have been "up all night" (you'll believe it when you see the photos) working on the story of Carlie Christine, a cheerleading coach at Casa Robles High School, who was outed as a Playboy and internet porn pinup yesterday after she got on the bad side of a bunch of bitchy wannabe cheerleaders.

But unlike everyone else foaming at the mouth over this amusing tale of moonlighting gone wrong, we have the photographic evidence to prove it really happened...

Christine, it turns out, used her real name (or at least the same name she teaches under) in posing for Playboy, which made it a cinch that the entire football team would eventually stumble across the snaps, which it did. But it was when an undetermined number of girls were kicked off the cheerleading squad for skipping school their awful parents leaked the online photos to shocked school officials.

According to the local media, Christine has been fired from her coaching job, although we'd be surprised if she doesn't quickly make ten times the money modeling. We found something CBS missed: Carlie Christine's modeling website.

I am shorter in stature but photograph very proportionate and I stay thin and toned.
I currently have shoulder-length natural brown hair and intend on keeping it the same from now on.
I do have four small tattoos that I cover with makeup or have airbrushed out for photos unless they are wanted for the shoot.

More of her nude photos, including full frontal images, can be seen here.

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Shockingly, This Teacher Did Something Inappropriate to Students

Paraguay Has Its Very Own Bill Clinton-Style Sex Scandal

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 14 Apr 2009 13:53:00 GMT

This post marks the first time we've ever linked to Al Jazeera, at least that I can recall. Not that we're afraid of what Sean Hannity and his McCarthyite followers might say.

Rather, the famed Arabic news service is rarely one to break major sex scandals... until now. And we're glad we didn't miss this one like Fox News already has, because it has three classic scandal plot points...

1) Fernando Lugo, the President of Paraguay, has admitted to fathering a child out of wedlock with Viviana Carrillo, who was not even his girlfriend at the time.

2) The boy is almost two, making the woman 24 and and Lugo 55 at the time of conception.

3) Lugo was technically still a Roman Catholic bishop at the time he knocked up the young woman. He was staying with her at her godmother's house when their sexual relationship began, culminating in the birth of the boy almost a year before he won the Presidency. So, he didn't knock anybody up while in office (that we know of), but don't forget that the Pope had actually turned down his request be relieved of the vows of celibacy-- even after the boy's birth. (Pope Benedict eventually gave in.)

This all only came to light when the woman was forced to file a paternity suit against the Paraguayan President-- he thought he could pull a John Edwards up until the last minute. More via Al Jazeera.

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"Britain's Sexiest Teacher" In Hot Water After Steamy Photo Shoot

Huge High School Sex Investigation Ends With A Single Arrest... A Lesbian Teacher

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 10 Apr 2009 15:08:00 GMT

Schools across the state of Texas, worried about the outbreak of teacher sex scandals, have launched a full-scale investigation in several districts, aimed at finding out about the goings-on before the police or media do. Unfortunately, this move has backfired in at least one case-- an unnamed high school teacher, embarrassed after the whole school found out he'd been investigated, decided to resign even though the investigators exonerated him.

After school districts began complaining about the unrest among staff, investigators decided to back off... having arrest one single, solitary person.

Jennifer Lea Burton, a 39-year-old phys ed teacher and coach in Beaumont, was busted for having sex on at least three occasions with a 15-year-old girl. Burton met the girl through her work as a volleyball, track, and basketball coach in the fall of 2008 and started sleeping with her almost immediately, according to unsubstantiated rumors. Investigators say the acts happened between September and November of last year and then may have ceased. In any case, Burton was not found out until a few weeks ago, when her name was dropped during the investigation. Burton turned herself in to police on the sexual assault charges and was released on a $75,000 bond.

By the way, Burton has a daughter in the district-- possibly even at the same high school. That can't be good for her well-being, either.

Via The Beaumont Enterprise.

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Jersey Girl's Torrid Love Affair With An Eighth Grader

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 15:08:00 GMT

23-year-old Jersey Girl Lindsay Massaro was a student teacher at a K-8 school in Frankford, about 60 miles west of New York City. He was a thirteen- or fourteen-year-old eighth grade guy who may or may not have been special ed. (According to unidentified sources, Massaro is working toward receiving her certificate in special education.)

They were totally non-sexual... until, out of nowhere, they fell into a torrid affair...

Massaro was arrested only a few days ago following a surprisingly-recent crime. (Usually with these cases, it's month later, after the boy's parents become suspicious or the student can't keep it quiet any longer and brags to his friends.) The timeline given to the media indicates March 21st is the day they first slept together, with the relationship dissolving exactly one week later, which would be this past Saturday. Massaro is charged with "second-degree sexual assault, third-degree endangering the welfare of a minor and fourth-degree criminal sexual contact" steaming from "acts of sexual penetration and sexual contact with the intimate parts of a minor male," according to this source. If she's convicted, which she may not be given the fact that there seems to be very little evidence, she faces an expected ten years in prison.

In any case, Massaro's teaching career is over. She's been fired from her job, is out on $75,000 bail, and has no hope of convincing another school to hire her unless this all turns out to be a horrible prank to which the culprits confess.

What do you think about these cases where the teacher is barred from having anything to do with children, thus barring them from working? Murderers out on bail are not barred from owning knives, for example. Just wondering...

Photo via this link.

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While You Were Sleeping: Oprah's School's Sex Scandal

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 13:08:00 GMT

Attention, ladies: Gerard Butler's next movie features the actor in a nude scene.

Bruno has been slapped with an NC-17 rating for pervasive sexxx.

Josh Hartnett is in the hospital for stomach pains. Cue gerbil allegations in three, two...

The weirdest (but maybe most interesting) story in ages: the woman who starved her 1-year-old son to death because her cult would not let the boy eat unless he said "Amen" pled guilty in the most unusual plea deal we've ever heard of. Prosecutors claim that the only way they could get her to take the deal was to promise-- and this they had to do in open court-- that, should the child be resurrected (as his mother claims he will one day), the charges are withdrawn. God bless Baltimore, baby.

A boy (age unknown) won a $2.3 million negligence settlement against the physician who botched his circumcision. I wouldn't do it for anything less than moving the decimal point two places to the right.

Oprah Winfrey's famous South African school is seeing its second sex scandal in as many years.

Sarah Palin has to pick a Democrat to fill a state Senate seat in Alaska. So, of course, she has a Republican switch his voter registration, say that there was something "wrong" with it, and take the seat. This is totally excusable politics, except for the fact that they're so sneaky and lie about their reasoning, the Democrats who have to accept this will never do it. Can Governor Palin do anything right?

A bunch of Somali pirates attacked... a decoy ship filled with troops looking for pirates to capture. Nice.

And Holly Madison claims to have insisted on "minimal" Photoshopping at Playboy during her time there.

Wacko Right-Wing Politician Hit With Nude Photo Scandal

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 16:02:00 GMT

Pauline Hanson has railed against an "Asian invasion" in Australia, been to jail for electoral fraud, appeared on Dancing With the Stars, and made a strong political comeback, all over the course of a relatively brief career.

Now, Hanson's bid "as an independent at the upcoming 2009 Queensland state election" may be in jeopardy after a series of nude and raunchy photos have surfaced...

When Hanson was 19, she posed for another teenager who she fell for thanks to his awesome Harley Davidson motorcycle. At least, that's what her now ex-boyfriend told the Australian papers that originally published these photos. At some point, he convinced her to pose for his camera:

Unfortunately, these censored pics are the only ones released by the media.

Two things: one, this girl looks older than 19 and two, how can we be sure this is her? Hanson denies it, flat out, although that's the obvious talking point for a right-wing politician. The publisher of the original photos claims that his paper did "a very, very extensive checking process which... involves stripping out colours, looking at the pixel count in images. These images are not doctored. They are not fakes, it's not her head stuck on somebody else's body."

While the model may be entirely human, how do we know the model is Pauline Hanson?

Australia's major political parties could care less-- they were in unanimous agreement that the photos will not affect this weekend's election...

Read more about this story here.

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Sloppy Seconds: Joaquin Phoenix Fights His Audience

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 21:20:00 GMT

Clive Owen doesn't really enjoy sex with Julia Roberts. Honestly, we don't blame him.

Don't listen to that stupid conservative's argument that James Carville is just as bad as Rush Limbaugh.

Helen Hunt may be engaged. Remember that show Mad About You? Ah... you youngin's.

Church sex is the best sex. Just sayin'.

Twin doctors-- is there anything creepier (if you've seen that Jeremy Irons movie, that is)? This guy and his twin were involving in molesting young boys in their offices.

Isn't it time Joaquin Phoenix admitted his stupid Casey Affleck documentary is a mockumentary? His diving into the audience to fight someone in Miami at 2am this morning is the dumbest celebrity story since the last one we ran about Paris Hilton, whatever that was.

We reported on this sex scandal at a Jersey high school, but the Rolling Stone story (via the Times Online) is essential reading.

Anne Heche gave birth to a boy with another lover we won't be able to remember.

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Germany's Biggest Sex Scandal Comes To A Stunning Conclusion

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 15:33:00 GMT

Back in November, we alerted you to the story of Susanna Klatten, Germany's richest women, a billionaire and heir to a BMW fortune tainted by Nazism, who was embroiled in a then-breaking story of blackmail, sex tapes, extramarital affairs, and millions of euros in cash.

This week, the trial of her one-time lover, a creep by the name of Helg Sgarbi, a Swiss businessman who apparently specializes in these types of crimes. As the court date approached, new and shocking information came to light that reopened old wounds throughout the country and the world...

In 2007, Sgarbi seduced Klatten at an Austrian spa and later at a Munich hotel. It was the hotel owner himself who filmed the hidden-camera sex tape, according to our report:

...Klatten's alleged lover and a friend of his, a hotel owner who filmed sexual trysts in his establishment. The duo hoped to received 40 million euros, but had to settle for 7.5 million from Klatten. Klatten, who helped foil her own kidnapping at the age of 16, was already talking to the cops.

Klatten may have hoped that, in going to the police, her husband would not learn of the plot, affair, and the lost 7.5 million. Too late-- there was a leak and soon the scandal made international headlines. Then there was this, according to Gawker:

What motivated Sgarbi? Reportedly, his real name was Helg Russak, and he was the descendant of forced laborers who worked in BMW factories during World War II — which made his choice of Geiss even odder.

Klatten's grandfather, Günther Quandt, served as an advisor to Hitler; his factories made batteries for Germany's submarines. His first wife, Magda, divorced him and married Joseph Goebbels, Hitler's propaganda minister. The Quandt family, which had denied involvement in the regime for decades, agreed to fund an investigation into their past after a documentary film presented incontrovertible evidence of BMW's complicity. [Gawker]

We almost started to feel sympathy for the girl... but that was before we learned that he was also guilty of extorting money from three other wealthy women, none of whom are yet rumored to have any Nazi ties...

Yesterday, on the first day of his trial, Helg confessed to all the charges and was sentenced to a mere six years in prison for sparing Germany a lengthy and embarrassing case. The public, mouths frothing, were left saying, "Wha happen?" and actually expressed great disappointment the thing didn't drag out for months...

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While You Were Sleeping: The Spitzer Scandal Never Dies

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 13:08:00 GMT

Remember that red-state porn craze we told you about? Apparently, Utah pays for it more than any other state.

Typical: 16 people were arrested following violence at a concert held to promote non-violence.

Hayden Panetierre may be headed toward a nervous breakdown. Yeesh.

We don't get it. Why would the police want Craigslist to boot almost all of its erotic service ads? Isn't this just going to make it harder for them to catch illegal sex activities? Not that we're complaining... legalize everything!

Amy Winehouse's visa was denied, which means she can't perform at Coachella. Is this visa-denial shit still happening for harmless kooks thirty years after Hoover hounded John Lennon?

This Albanian sex scandal would've been worth a post if it hadn't been, you know, Albanian.

Does Eliot Spitzer have to choke a hooker? Apparently, yes... at least, according to the woman in this story, which also features a teasing P.S. about another Governor, not from New York, who was a client of the same madam.

Good Lord, is this weird: NAMBLA (the North American Man-Boy Love Association-- you know, the pervs) tried to put a hit on New York State Attorney General, possibly the next Governor, for a mere $10,000.

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While You Were Sleeping: If Even Apple Is In Trouble..

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 14:08:00 GMT

On this radio show discussing Obama having a beer at an NBA game, does it mean anything that some of these callers are against it?

Oh no... what we've always feared... High School Musical 4.

The last thing you want to do when you're running for public office is get yourself accused of sex crimes.

The cop who saved a bunch of lives in a Utah school shooting has pleaded no contest for having sex with a teenage girl while responding to a 9-1-1 call at her house.

Cook County Commissioner Mike Quigley will likely be the next Congressman from Illinois. Yep, another member of the Illinois government is heading to Washington...

Britney Spears launched her tour last night.

A woman called 9-1-1 three times in a row because her McDonald's didn't have any McNuggets.

Speaking of 9-1-1-- if you have a LG 830 Spyder, you seriously need to drop everything and read this.

Rupert Murdoch had his revenge on his biographer, who may be involved in a sex scandal.

And does it mean anything for the country at large if Apple laid off fifty workers yesterday?

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Teacher In Lesbian Sex Scandal Story Not Helping...

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 15:16:00 GMT

This is the face of terror. Or it could be the face of true love. (Either way, could the cops have made this mug shot any more like a documentary on the Hale-Bop cult?)

Angie Fetty is a thirty-four-year-old English teacher in Pennsylvania and now an accused sex offender. Unlike most of the alleged criminals profiled on this blog, Fetty is a female accused of sleeping with another female, in this case, a sixteen-year-old who may or may not testify against her lover.

But it's not the fact that this is a lesbian sex scandal that caught our attention... it's the bizarre saga at the root of the case.

Turns out Fetty wasn't very discreet with her encounters with the student. First of all, how does a sixteen-year-old girl get to stay over her teacher's house every night-- or at least several times per week, according to the report? Are the parents pulling all-nighters at work or something? In any case, these two thought they could hide their love away by kissing and parting at the bus stop, leaving the teacher to drive to school and the teenager to ride the bus, as if this would throw off the "scent" or something. Apparently, Fetty didn't know that her neighbors are, for the most part, not blind and, of course, the rumors ultimately made their way to the school.

This is the second lesbian teacher sex case in the last few months-- that one also featured some weird sleepovers and incredibly oblivious parents. Here's what we said about that case:

It all started when Thompson [the teacher] proposed the 14-year-old girl go to lunch with her. It soon escalated into sleepovers and racy text messages... while Thompson continued to be married to her husband. (Didn't he think something was strange when his wife kept staying over some kid's house?!)
"...But the couple were found out when the parents discovered them having sex one evening. Their reaction was simply to request that their daughter keep her door open when she had visitors. Thompson’s husband also walked in on the pair when he came home from work earlier than expected one day. [Bild.de]"

Who knows? This might even become a trend...

More about the case here.

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Thing #457 Not to F*ck: A Car Wash Vacuum Cleaner

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 18:57:00 GMT

If you've just been paroled after a somewhat lengthy prison stay, one that featured no conjugal visits and no reported sex with any female administrative assistants, you're probably about forty times hornier than the average male, who is, on average, forty times hornier than Jacques Casanova after three hits of ecstasy.

So, it's almost-- almost, we emphasize-- understandable that Jason Leroy Savage did something unspeakable with an inanimate object after his release...

It was October 16, 2008, in Thomas Township, Michigan, and the Fill-N-Wash Car Wash (no pun intended, of course) was open for business. According to reports, a police officer responded to a call about "suspicious activity" at the business at about 6:45am. Upon arrival, he immediately noticed Savage standing in an "awkward" position near a coin-operated car vacuum machine. As he approached, he noticed Savage's pants were at his ankles and that he was receiving a literal "blow job" from the vacuum cleaner. Savage shrieked, "Oh shit!" and tried to explain... although he mainly ended up just apologizing for his embarrassment at having been caught having sex with a machine.

Savage was apparently on parole for a drug charge, among other minor crimes. He pleaded no contest yesterday and will face sentencing in March.

Original reports are here and the followup is here.

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Barack Obama's "Gay Sex Scandal" Is The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 16:28:00 GMT

...for liberals.

Because the "Barack Obama is gay" narrative is entirely the work one deranged and entirely unlikeable character, he can only embolden Democrats with his bizarre and unbelievable claims...

Larry Sinclair, the same transparent wacko whose story of doing cocaine off the cock of Barack, has apparently returned to save the Globe from plummeting newsstand sales. "Well, what have we got? There's nothing going on right now, so let's recycle the Obama Is Gay story-- just don't mention Sinclair on the cover, so everyone will think these are new allegations from someone actually slightly believable." Or something like that.

It turns out Sinclair is putting out a book, according to his frightening and laughable website. (Why is his shirt on backwards on the homepage, for starters?) Here's the Globe's obnoxious tease for the issue:

PRESIDENT Barack Obama is caught up in a new gay sex and drug scandal - and his loving wife is heartbroken, sources tell GLOBE in a blockbuster world exclusive. Find out all the details of the letter Michelle Obama received from the MAN who claims to be her husband's lover - and how America's devastated First Lady is fighting back against a shocking new tell-all book. It's must reading!

If Michelle Obama were devastated by these allegations, she would have been over them this summer, as they are nothing knew. Nonetheless, check out the desperate right-wing kooks that come out to support Sinclair. These are the same people that thought illegal wiretapping, war crimes, the pointless deaths of thousands of American troops, rumors of W's people having wacked W's mistress (we're not making that up), and Dick Cheney's shooting of a hunting partner were all nothing to cry about over the past eight years. Oh, but one guy without a shred of proof that he had gay sex with the black Democrat in the White House... the outrage!

-Congratulations to you and my thanks to the Globe. I appreciate the magazine for their consistency in taking and printing updates on your narrative and the constant endeavor to expose the truth about Barack Obama.
-Heee heeee!!! America's "First Lady," is heartbroken! Well, diddums! She must have known about the book quite some time ago, though I guess she was hoping that if there were enough threats to Larry, the book would disappear. Well, Mrs Oscammer, why not invest in a few cardigans to cover those arms of yours because with any luck you'll be out in the cold before too long!
-Since Senator Byrd is criticizing our "king scum", I wonder if he will just suddenly die? Supposedly in the future, we will not have the freedom of speech to criticize him.bkw
-Rock on Larry !! I hope mo hits the wall and explodes with barry soetoro right behind her ! They are nothing but crap on the face of the earth !

The more these twits carry on, the better it makes Obama look. Read more, if you can stomach it, at Larry Sinclair's blog.

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Monk Sex Scandal Proves Forced Celibacy Won't Work

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 14:46:00 GMT

A reader alerted us to a sex scandal we missed out on: a Thai monk who resigned from his monastery after getting caught having sex, after a wild teen sex and booze extravaganza at his place.

Even weirder: it's a gay Thai monk sex scandal... and you won't want to miss these comments in the Bangkok Post...

Our story starts with an unnamed abbot, the head father/monk in Nakhon Si Thammarat, whatever that is. One night, when his male lover is indisposed for an undisclosed reason, Father Anonymous hosts a large gang of unruly teens for booze and innuendos involving trying to "one-up the Catholic Church." The teens leave, but the next day, there is a large cum stain on the abbot's bed sheets. (We don't even want to get into how weird it is that someone would leave a cum stain lying around-- but then again, maybe they don't have Kleenex in Thailand.)

Assuming the worst-- that this stain wasn't the result of a masturbatory session run amok-- the abbot's lover took him to task, started a fight, got smacked around, and reported daddy-o to the police.

The abbot fled and quit the monkhood to avoid arrest and forced disrobement.

Yes, but he may have enjoyed a "forced disrobement."

By the way, some of the many comments on this story are priceless. Many of these people don't know what "a Buddhist monk" means or what the hell they are talking about.

Do realy anybody in Thailand follow buddist rules. Is it not like that,- if somebody close to you, or yourselves have benefit of it,- you may do what ever you want without breaking the rules?
Big deal. There are sexual affairs going on in monasteries.
[Columnist] Khun Sanitsuda is right. Thai Buddhism needs a major overhaul. However, moaning and groaning about it is not very useful. She should offer constructive idess as to how this can be achieved.
Stop making donations to the monks,they run to buy mobile phones, wigs and run for sex at night.
The human sex drive is as natural as eating food or breathing air. Sexual desire is the reason the world is over populated. The only way to make a man live a lifetime without sexual desire is to surgically his eyes and sex organs at birth
It is really unnatural to let men and women abstain from sex in the name of religion. If you see in Islam the Prophet Mohammad married 12 ladies in his life. Islam never allows religion to overpower basic human instints. This is the reason a Muslim man if can do justice can marry four ladies at a time.

It gets nuttier and more profound, sometimes simultaneously, from there. Read the rest via this link.

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Wall Street Madam Goes Down. Alone.

Emily Farris — Fri, 06 Feb 2009 20:24:00 GMT

New York madam Kristin Davis—who once counted former New York governor Eliot Spitzer among her clients—is going down. But her clients aren't gong down with her. At least not yet.

After her arrest, Davis pleaded guilty to "promoting prostitution" and forfeited nearly $500,000 in profits. And even after she offered her client list to the district attorney's office, Davis said they "showed no interest" in pursuing the men who would charge prostitution services to corporate credit cards. Many ordered her to send invoices for computer consulting and construction expenses—fraud on their part, according to former New York prosecutor Sid Baumgarten.

Davis did however, give her list to ABC News, who gladly accepted it.

From her list, ABC determined that clients included:

-a vice president of NBC Universal
-a part owner of an MLB team
-a major New York real estate developer who would "come to the door wearing women's panties"
-bankers and directors from JP Morgan Securities, Goldman Sachs, Merrill Lynch, Lehman Brothers and Deutsche Bank

A defense attorney who has represented madams before says that in New York, while Davis "was prosecuted for a felony, the clients would be guilty of misdemeanors."

Davis is aware she's getting the short end of the shaft here:

"I, as the proprietor of a business get arrested and lose everything, when no one that was frequenting my business, spending $200,000, $300,000 a year, has been punished in any way or even looked into."

She has not yet decided whether she'll release her client list to the public, but considering she's written a book and has leaked it to ABC news, we plan on seeing it pretty soon.

Her interview with ABC airs tonight on 20/20 at 10 p.m. ET.

[ABC: CEOs, Bankers Used Corporate Credit Cards for Sex, Says New York Madam]

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This Week in Gayness: Portland Mayor's Sex Scandal Heats Up

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 17:40:00 GMT

A gay candidate for Mayor in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, is not helping the cause by being a "fiscal conservative" who runs up astronomical debts to small businesses and then refuses to pay.

If you're gay and want to be on Tyra, you'd better be a "queeny."

Ted Haggard's former superchurch may have bribed a 20-year-old man into keeping mum about his sexual relationship with the preacher man.

ABC is the top network for gay themes, if GLAAD Media Award nominations are an indicator.

New York was thrilled to hear that its LGBT nemesis Joe Bruno has been indicted.

Bobby Griffith, a gay man, committed suicide at the age of 20 because pressure from the world around him was too much to take. His mother was a hardcore Christian and had fought with him over his sexuality, but after his death, she realized her mistake and became a crusading activist for the gay cause. Now, Lifetime is airing a movie starring Sigourney Weaver about this story. Of course, Focus On (Breaking Up) The Family objects.

And Sam Adams, newly minted Mayor of Portland, Oregon, has been unable to dog sex scandal rumors. He has returned to work at City Hall while a probe looks into whether Mr. Breedlove, his possibly underage lover, was indeed underage at the time of their affair. Breedlove says the couple kissed twice when he was only 17, but that was it.

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Emily Farris — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 23:41:00 GMT

President Barack Obama (we love typing that!) overturned the Global Gag Rule today. [NYT]

We're not ones to let a little salmonella come between us and peanut butter, so we ate our peanut butter sandwich Girl Scout cookies before we even knew they were safe. [The Republican]

Also, we spent too much time on Craigslist today, but we found these gems:

This Kansas City gent wants a skinny girl, the kind other girls hate because she's so skinny. But only if "U R asked by other people if you have an eating disorder." [Craigslist Kansas City]

If a guy wants to lick you 'everywher' does it really matter if he can't spell? [Craigslist Corpus Christi]

Oh, and Facebook is probably ruining your relationship, whether you know it or not, so you might as well go on TV to talk about it. [Craigslist Austin]

We haven't heard anything from Ted Haggard since his gay sex/crystal Meth scandal. That's because the severance package from his church prevented him from talking. But in the HBO documentary, The Trials of Ted Haggard, he finally does. [VSL]

First Gay Mayor in the U.S. Already Embroiled in Major Sex Scandal

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 18:32:00 GMT

When Portland, Oregon Mayor Sam Adams was running for office back in 2007 (he was sworn in last year), he was dogged by rumors of a love affair with-- you called it-- an intern...

Adams dismissed the rumors by saying that he did not have sex with Beau Breedlove (we thought it had to be bullshit when we heard that name) who was rumored to be 17 at the time of his employment at the Oregon State Legislature back in '05. Now, in a shocking turn of events, Adams has been forced to admit to having had sex with the boy, but denies that the teen was underage at the time. Here's the full text of his remarks, from a press release out of the Mayor's office:

I want to publicly acknowledge a mistake I have made and I want to apologize for it.

In the past, I have characterized my relationship with Beau Breedlove as purely non-sexual. That is not true. Beau Breedlove and I had a sexual relationship for a few months in the summer of 2005 after he turned 18 years of age.

I should have been honest at the time about the true nature of my relationship with Beau Breedlove when questions about my relationship with him first surfaced publicly in October 2007. In fact, Beau encouraged me to be honest about the facts of our relationship. I am deeply sorry that I asked him to lie for me.

I lied at the time because I was afraid that people would believe untrue rumors, being circulated by an undeclared mayoral opponent, that I had broken a law involving sexual relations with a minor. But this is not a good excuse.

It's not clear yet whether Adams, the first openly gay man to head a major U.S. city, decided to reveal the supposed "truth" about his sex life because of an investigation or some other concern. We'll have more on this as it comes in...

Via USA Today.

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: Psychology Teachers Getting In On The Student Sex Craze

14-Year-Old Girl Sold Into Marital And Sexual Slavery For $16 Grand

Ontario Cops Teach You All About Pimps And Ho's

Florida Teacher Says, "Oh, THAT Student I Molested In 1983... He Was 16, It Was Okay"

In Which We Finally Put The Lid on 2008: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of Last Year

Emily Farris — Fri, 09 Jan 2009 22:22:00 GMT

Ed note: Yes, we're running it every day this week.

Now that we're settling comfortably into 2009, we have a little time to reflect on 2008. And what kind of seemingly professional blog would we be if we didn't compile our top ten posts of last year? With boobs, Mormons, abortion and booze we hope the list is everything you hoped it would be and more.

Read more...

This Slow News Week is Killing Michael Jackson (Heee He!)

Emily Farris — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 17:22:00 GMT

Okay, guys. Stop grabbing your crotches, it's time to get serious. Michael Jackson is dying. His rare genetic skin disorder has spread to his lungs and now he needs a lung transplant! Also: Booze! Pain killers!

A source "close to the star" and apparently even closer to The Enquirer says "Painkillers and booze have caught up with him. The only way he was able to cope with the stress of sex scandals and his roller-coaster life was to mask the pain with substance abuse."

Again, it is a very, very slow news week. You'd think as long as The Enquirer has probably been sitting on this story they'd be able to Photoshop some crazy image of Jackson's lungs oozing out of his little nose slits.

[National Enquirer: PALS FEAR: JACKO 6 MONTHS TO LIVE AND THE CLOCK IS TICKING!]

Related:

Michael Jackson's Undies Made of Pixie Dust and Tears, Cost $1 Million

Sloppy Seconds: Amy Winehouse's Activism, Michael Jackson's Baby Mama, Sperm and Hot Water

Sloppy Seconds: Jerry Lewis Continues to Hate on the Gays

Sloppy Seconds: Billie Jean Was Indeed My Lover?

Sloppy Seconds: Who's Not Allowed to Play With Paris?

[Image via Jezebel]

Scanner's Greatest Hits: The Top 10 Posts of 2008

Emily Farris — Wed, 07 Jan 2009 20:18:00 GMT

Ed note: Yes, we're running it every day this week.

Read more...

In Case You Missed It Yesterday: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Emily Farris — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 19:02:00 GMT

Read more...

Sloppy Seconds: Kate Winslet's Secret

Emily Farris — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 21:33:00 GMT

Things seem to be looking up for Jennifer Hudson this year. Rumor has it, she may be singing the "Star Spangled Banner" for Obama's inauguration. [Radar]

Matt Dillon is facing a possible three months in jail if convicted for driving 103 miles an hour in a 65-mph zone. [Us]

John Travolta's son, Jett, is dead at 16. [Gawker]

Who is Lily Allen's new gray-haired mystery man? [FadedYouth]

The men's room at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport where Larry Craig was arrested for soliciting sex is losing its appeal as a tourist destination. [Queerty]

Like her mother before her, Bristol Palin went straight back to ~~work~~ school days after the birth of her son. Or so her mother would like us to know. [People]

Like us, Kate Winslet does not go to the gym. Unlike us, it works for her. [FameCrawler]

Related:

What's It Like Having Sex With Leonardo DiCaprio?

While You Were Sleeping: Kate Winslet's Underage Sex

Kate Winslet Takes it Off for Vanity Fair

China and Japan At War Again, This Time Over Who Has the Best Sex Tape Scandal

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 20:19:00 GMT

This may be one of the most impressive sex tapes around. For not only does it feature a very lucky man getting it on with a very attractive lady, it goes on to involve three more women in the course of one recording.

Japan's ultimate fighter Hayato “Mach” Sakurai, who fought a widely-publicized event on New Year's Eve, is seen here in a sex tape that has been making the rounds on his country's most risque blogs. Sakurai isn't talking about it-- not just because it was a distraction from his training, but because his wife may not be too happy to have seen him banging four different women.

Meanwhile, China is still dealing with its first major sex tape story-- the latest chapter involves internet sensation (and, thanks to her online nudity, current prison inmate) Kappa Girl being offered a movie deal by Harmony Films in the UK. It may help her transition to fame, since most of her blog entries are in Mandarian or another language English-only pervs obviously can't appreciate. (More about her case here, via Fleshbot.)

Of course, if anything interesting should surface in a language we can roughly fathom, we'll post it here.

Scanner's Woman of the Year: You Decide

Emily Farris — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 19:43:00 GMT

GOP Vice Presidential Nominee Sarah Palin vs. Eliot Spitzer's High Class Call Girl Ashley Alexandra Dupre

No, this is not a Who Would You Rather? (though, who would you rather?). It's just us asking you to help decide who should be Scanner's Woman of the Year. We had an easy time with Scanner's Man of the Year, and his penis, but we'll tell you all about that tomorrow.

Woman of the year was a little more difficult. There were two women who brought us more laughter, tears and page views than any other females all year. Now it's up to you to decide which lovely lady will be awarded this top honor.

The winner gets, at the very least, an open love letter and photo essay from Scanner Emily.

Related:

Who Would You Rather: Nude Sarah Palin vs. Nude Sarah Palin...

Top 5 Rumors We'd Like to Start About Sarah Palin... But Won't

Loving, Naked Tributes to Sarah Palin Just Keep on Coming

Ashley Alexandra Dupre Did Exactly What We Told Her Not to Do

Who Would You Rather? Ashley Alexandra Dupre vs. "Kristen"

An Open Letter to Ashley Alexandra Dupre: We're Gonna Write a Book!

Scanner Highs and Lows: In Which We Contemplate Tina Fey's Breasts

Emily Farris — Fri, 05 Dec 2008 23:57:00 GMT

To be fair, we also thought a lot about her scar and the rest of her body....

Highs:

We made some new friends.

We found lots and lots and lots of bearded men. All in one place.

But we still love this one.

We found the one guy in the world who didn't know what a "boner" was.

Our faith in humanity may wain, but our faith in cute animals never will.

Yes, rockstar babies are beautiful.

Our dad, and old people in general, are really, really, really cute.

We finally got a little bit of LOST.

And learned the origins of Tina Fey's scar.

Apparently we can get an abortion for Christmas ("No, Dad. The $400 will keep me up to date with all my girl check ups for four years.)

Did you hear the one about Anderson Cooper and Michael Phelps getting in the pool together?

Dita Von Teese in German Playboy.

Scanner Matt did not get any beard hair in any of his three turkeys.

Lows:

The world, including Tina Fey, made a big deal out of the fact that she used to be "fat." But hey, she had some knockers.

We're pretty sure these creamy cum crepes are for real. Somebody pass the gizz juice!

Eliot Spitzer got a blog job and didn't even consider writing for us. Jerk.

Grossgrossgrossgross.

Image via vanityfair.com

Ad Agency Sex Scandal Claims One Victim: The Cameraman

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 21:55:00 GMT

A screenshot from the already-infamous camera phone sex tape of a guy's co-workers getting it on, with the annoying Gawker addition of a turkey to cover the "naughty bits."

If you haven't seen it yet, you haven't been missing anything (the time you spent glancing at the above photo is more than enough)... although the story has gotten a lot more interesting in light of what happened to the guy who filmed some of sexcapades and spread the clip around via e-mail.

First off, he was fired. Secondly, he gave an interview to vent about his punishment, which was not equal to that of the participants, both of whom were cheating on their partners and got to keep their jobs.

In an interview with Asylum, the anonymous cinematographer had this to say about the incident:

It was one Friday afternoon and I received a call from a co-worker that he had found, or stumbled upon, two people making love in a cubicle. I didn't believe him, but I just ran up to meet him anyway to see what it was and sure enough, there were two people doing it. I know their names but I don't know them personally. It was around 5:10 in the afternoon -- not very late at all. It's an ad agency, so there are people there around the clock. The creatives don't leave until around 7 or 8.
I showed a couple of officemates on my phone and everyone was shocked and awed. I downloaded it to my computer and sent it on to two other co-workers and that was all the digital distribution I did and it just went viral from there.
They [the sex fiends] still work there. I think it's wrong. I don't see why I should get canned and not the ones who were doing the deed. But my plan is just to keep on trucking and find another job. My true goal is to join an agency as an art director.

Read the rest of the interview at Asylum.

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Germany's Biggest Sex Scandal Comes To A Stunning Conclusion

While You Were Sleeping: The Spitzer Scandal Never Dies

While You Were Sleeping: If Even Apple Is In Trouble..

Teacher In Lesbian Sex Scandal Story Not Helping...

Thing #457 Not to F*ck: A Car Wash Vacuum Cleaner

Barack Obama's "Gay Sex Scandal" Is The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Monk Sex Scandal Proves Forced Celibacy Won't Work

Wall Street Madam Goes Down. Alone.

This Week in Gayness: Portland Mayor's Sex Scandal Heats Up

Sloppy Seconds: Ted Haggard Speaks

First Gay Mayor in the U.S. Already Embroiled in Major Sex Scandal

In Which We Finally Put The Lid on 2008: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of Last Year

Top 10 Scanner Posts of 2008: Because We Can Never Get Enough Ashley Alexandra Dupre

This Slow News Week is Killing Michael Jackson (Heee He!)

Scanner's Greatest Hits: The Top 10 Posts of 2008

In Case You Missed It Yesterday: The Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Top Ten Scanner Posts of 2008

Sloppy Seconds: Kate Winslet's Secret

China and Japan At War Again, This Time Over Who Has the Best Sex Tape Scandal

Scanner's Woman of the Year: You Decide

Scanner Highs and Lows: In Which We Contemplate Tina Fey's Breasts

Ad Agency Sex Scandal Claims One Victim: The Cameraman