Scanner : scrubs

Bearded Man of the Week: Justin Vernon

Emily Farris — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 23:37:00 GMT

We've heard Bon Iver's "Skinny Love" played all over the place for the last six months or so, always thinking we were listening to TV on the Radio. We should know better, considering Kyp Malone of TVOTR used to be our upstairs neighbor. But, apparently living close to coolness does not make one cool.

After discovering that the man singing was Justin Vernon we set out to learn one thing: does he have a beard? You fucking bet he does.

Watch these videos and tell us you're not in love with him, too:

We totally want him to put a baby in us. But just one.

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: Dr. Jack Shephard

Bearded Man of the Week: Joaquin Phoenix

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Bearded Man of the Week: Prince William

Bearded Man of the Week: There Could Only Be One

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

We Finally Found a Beard We Simply Cannot Endorse

Emily Farris — Fri, 23 Jan 2009 17:01:00 GMT

Did you ever think that we'd meet a beard we didn't love? Well, kids. Today we did.

We understand there are spiritual issues behind the length of this beard and by all means if you think God wants you to grow a beard, who are we to argue? But we just can't, er don't want to, imagine getting our feet all tangled up in this thing during sex:

via videosift.com

Bearded Men of the Week: Unshaven Bartenders in New York

I Hate Myself for Loving You: "Men in Trees"

Bearded Man of the Week: Dr. Jack Shephard

Emily Farris — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 22:43:00 GMT

It's pretty obvious to everyone by this point that the LOST producers and writers have no idea what they're talking about. So we're not surprised that two of the producers last night called Dr. Jack Shephard's beard "gross." While we saw the beard in Season 4, it made a re-appearance in Season 5. And since stupid Ben Linus made Jack shave it off last night, we will honor the great beard that was, after the jump.

Yummy! Damn you, Benjamin Linus!

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Bearded Man of the Week: Joaquin Phoenix

Our Bearded Man of Last Week Has Some Issues

Emily Farris — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 19:07:00 GMT

So, we're starting to think we should just find a homeless dude to be our boyfriend. Because we're definitely not turned off by this picture of Joaquin Phoenix. In fact—well, never mind...

Anyway, that's not why we're posting it. The poor guy fell at a concert last week and after watching the video (after the jump) we want to just scoop him up and hug him. And maybe, just maybe, throw him in a shower to sober him up. But we're keeping the beard!

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: Joaquin Phoenix

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

[via LadyThrills]

Bearded Men of the Week: Unshaven Bartenders in New York

Emily Farris — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 23:57:00 GMT

Last month, a slew of New York City bartenders decided to grow out their beards, just for the hell of it. Well, that and to make us rethink our rule against dating bartenders. And our decision to leave to leave New York.

Glorious hairy pictures after the jump...

[Time Out New York: Bear market indeed: Unshaven bartenders face off]

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: There Could Only Be One

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Bearded Man of the Week: Prince William

Bearded Man of the Week: Joaquin Phoenix

Bearded Woman of the Week: Erin Dollar

Bearded Man of the Week: Joaquin Phoenix

Emily Farris — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 22:37:00 GMT

We've always like Joaquin Phoenix just fine. We loved him in "Walk the Line" and even, shamefully, in "The Village." But we've never wanted to, you know, shove him into the nearest bathroom stall and rip his clothes of. Well, not until now, anyway. Joaquin grew a beard!

We pulled this image from Dlisted. They didn't like his beard as much over there, just look at what the image was named: http://www.dlisted.com/node/29980/images/joaquinishideous2.jpg

That's fine D, we'll take him at Scanner.

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: There Could Only Be One

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Bearded Man of the Week: Prince William

Bearded Woman of the Week: Erin Dollar

Bearded Man of the Week: Prince William

Emily Farris — Fri, 02 Jan 2009 21:01:00 GMT

Sorry we're a little (okay, a lot) late on the Bearded Man this week. Believe it or not, we had a hard time coming up with one (send bearded men to scanner@nerve.com or straight to Scanner Emily in Kansas City!) until we saw this little headline: "POLL: What Do You Think of Prince William’s New Beard?"

Hot damn!

We think the beard is a vast improvement on his royal baby face. What do you think?

[People: POLL: What Do You Think of Prince William’s New Beard?]

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: There Could Only Be One

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Bearded Woman of the Week: Erin Dollar

Bearded Man of the Week: There Could Only Be One

Emily Farris — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 19:12:00 GMT

I was busy moving into my new apartment yesterday so I wasn't able to post the bearded man of the week. But come on folks, this week it could really only be one guy—the ultimate bearded man...

Santa Claus!

No one rocks the beard better than Santa. His is the biggest, the longest and for being the biggest and the longest it is, by far, the cleanest. However, we're more partial to the natural look on Santa.

You?

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Bearded Woman of the Week: Erin Dollar

Better Than Porn: Whiskerino

[Image, Image]

Bearded Woman of the Week: Erin Dollar

Emily Farris — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 19:26:00 GMT

No, we have not run out of bearded men to feature here on Scanner after just three short weeks (even though we seem to have no access to them, the world is full of beautiful bearded men), but we did come across a bearded woman who is a little bit our soul mate and a lot our hero. Oh, also she's absolutely adorable, if you can believe it.

Okay, so she doesn't grow her own beard, but she puts more care into it than most men put into the scraggly mops on their faces (we love those, too). Plus we're all for putting more beards in the world, real or fake. And we're so adding one of Erin's beards to our Christmas list.

[Beards.]

[Beards on Etsy]

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Better Than Porn: Whiskerino

Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

Emily Farris — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 22:53:00 GMT

If there's one thing we love more than bearded men here at Scanner, it's funny bearded men. If there is more than one thing we love more than bearded men, the other is bearded men who are funny and also have bellies. What can we say? We like big, warm, cuddly, funny hairy dudes. Especially when it's "dangerously cold" outside.

That is why our Bearded Man of the Week is comedian Zach Galifianakis.

We're really sad the video cut out before the effeminate gay basher. Perhaps we could get him to do it for us in person before we go. We've seen Zach hanging out at the bar four doors down from our apartment, on multiple occasions, but have yet to stop in and say "hi." He's also friends with our old friend Bobby.

Anyway, Zach, keep the beard and the funny coming and we'll love you forever. Hell, even if you lose the funny, keep the beard (and the belly).

[zachgalifianakis.com]

Related:

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Better Than Porn: Whiskerino

I Hate Myself for Loving You: "Men in Trees"

New Issue of "Pinups" Gets Us All Hot and Bothered

[Image]

While You Were Sleeping: Scrubs & Friends

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 15:18:00 GMT

Denis Leary can't escape controversy if he tries.

Geffen is blaming Axl Rose for the flop that is Chinese Democracy. Releasing the album exclusively to Best Buy stores and not really promoting that fact may not have been the blockbuster idea of the century either, dumbass.

Someone send these people a lifetime supply of birth control pills, stat: Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag want to have children.

Friends guest stars are trying to boost the ratings of just about every show. Now, Courtney Cox is guesting on the January 6 episode of Scrubs.

MTV is feeling the crunch-- and so will its employees.

Iraqi women are back on the road.

Jessica Alba + swimsuits + Campari is an ad campaign we can get behind.

And Paris Hilton's second album may not come out. Pass the Campari, baby!

Related:

9-Year-Old Boy Teaches You How To Pick Up Girls

Louisiana Teacher Gets Closer to Student By Sleeping with His Father

While You Were Sleeping: Who's #1 on Yahoo?

While You Were Sleeping: What Men Think Women Think Men Want

Why Beyonce Was In No Hurry to Marry Jay-Z

Bearded Man of the Week: Sam Beam

Emily Farris — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 16:24:00 GMT

Now that it's getting miserably cold outside—at least in Brooklyn—we're staring a new feature to keep us nice and warm here at Scanner (okay, really it's to keep me, Scanner Emily, from drying up...I like to objectify and fetishize men sometimes, you know?).

Each week, at least until we start showing some skin again, we're going to bring you a beautiful bearded man.

This week's bearded man is Sam Beam, the musical genius behind Iron & Wine...what we happen to listen to every day in the shower, er, every day that we shower (which is most days).

While he performs live with a band, Beam is pretty much a one-man act, at least when it comes to recording.

Listen. Love. Watch some women dance.

Sam Beam, we would like to dance for you.

[Iron & Wine]

Related:

New Issue of "Pinups" Gets Us All Hot and Bothered

I Hate Myself for Loving You: "Men in Trees"

Who Are You and What Have You Done With Robert Downey, Jr?

"Pinups" Issue No. 5 Gets a 10

[Image, Image]

TV Gets Back to What It Does Best: Canceling Shows

Bryan Christian — Tue, 12 Feb 2008 19:06:00 GMT

Now that the Writer's Strike is over, it's time to figure out what shows are coming back and when. We got a couple of links to pages here and here with hints, and heard something on NPR yesterday, and while we haven't done a case-by-case comparison, we'll summarize what we know:

-- Lots of shows -- particularly sitcoms -- are going back into production now, and will be burning off already shot episodes or shooting a handful more to be shown through May or beyond. Big names include: 30 Rock, Battlestar Galactica, The Office, My Name is Earl, Lost, and a few other shows you probably first saw on iTunes.

-- Gossip Girl -- which all of us Scanner bloggers just realized means nothing to us but has a fairly dedicated following, we hear -- will return with new episodes aired through the summer, so just like we did with 90210 and The OC, expect us to "get way more into it than we thought" around June.

-- No 24 and no more Heroes, Life, Pushing Daisies, Dirty Sexy Money, Moonlight, Private Practice or Chuck for the year; they will likely all be relaunched or continued next fall.

-- Cancelled or iffy: Bionic Woman, Cane, Life is Wild (which, like... huh?), Friday Night Lights, Prison Break, One Tree Hill, Reaper, Back to You, and ER, which we imagine NBC has been looking for an excuse like this to unload since Noah Wyle left.

-- Producer Bill Lawrence is negotiating for time to wrap up Scrubs. Bill: let it go.