Scanner : prime minister

Ukraine's Hot Goth Prime Minister and Other Breaking Goth News

Colleen Kane — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 16:09:00 GMT

In Ukraine, they have gothic prime minister. What a country!

Stateside, a Pennsylvania woman was selling what she called "gothic kittens" on eBay until the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals stepped in earlier this week.

What made the poor kittahys so "goth," and video after the jump.

The three kittens seized by the SPCA were pierced in their ears and on their backs.

We think the descriptor "emo" might have gotten the seller more hits on eBay, but we're glad the jig is now up for that sicko.

In other goth news, did you know that God Hates Goths?

Top 10 Ways to Avoid Becoming The Crazy Cat Lady

Marry, F*ck or Kill: Slutoween Edition

While You Were Sleeping: The Lapdancers And The Prime Minister

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 14:08:00 GMT

A New England Patriots cheerleader was booted from the squad after Facebook pictures showed her drawing penises and swastikas on a passed-out girl's body.

The New York Times wants you to know that stretching before exercise is actually a bad idea.

And so it begins... check out what this Floridian DJ did to "celebrate" Obama's victory...

Mark Larsen, who is white, dressed in blackface makeup at the start of his show.
“This gives me that Uncle Tom feel,” said Larsen, who also joked about changing his name to Marcus Washington Larsen. “Are you sure this comes off? Because I don’t feel like running for president.”

Before Tuesday’s election, Larsen talked about seeing a long line of black people waiting to vote at a Tampa Bay area polling place, saying they “looked like the line for takeout at Big Tim’s Barbecue” in St. Petersburg. And shortly after putting on the blackface makeup Wednesday, he told a caller he presumed to be black that “You love (America) because you have a man of color going to the White House. Before that, you probably were a malcontent." [Tampabay.com]

Lost in all the election hoopla yesterday: Massachusetts decriminalized marijuana of less than one ounce.

Why do we get the feeling this is going to be terrible? Antonio Banderas may be playing Salvador Dali.

Even these exotic dancers were unable to get the British Prime Minister's attention.

And Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling are over... are you reading this, Scanner Emily?

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And You Thought Bill Clinton Was A Sex-Crazed Politician...

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 31 Oct 2008 13:52:00 GMT

As part of our continuing obsession with Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi('s sex life), we present highlights from the extended New Yorker profile of the high-profile cheater.

There won't be any juicier gossip in your news all day, even if Paris Hilton gets donkey punched by Brad Pitt...

Berlusconi, in his undeniably fascist approach to government, is only remotely concerned with his philandering, bribery, corruption, and other crimes. It makes for uncomfortable and even disturbing reading, although mighty juicy!

Here are a few highlights:

having survived some seventeen criminal trials without ultimately being convicted.
an enormous casting couch that Berlusconi used to grant favors to aspiring actresses and to try to bring down the government
does little to hide the fact that he has had a face-lift and hair transplants
a dodering septuagenarian addicted to penis pumps and mysterious injections; supports like to paint him as a tireless Don Juan, capable of satisfying two or three women at once
[a comedian said about Mara Carfagna, a close associate and rumored lover of Berlusconi's] "You can't make someone Minister of Equl Opportunity just because she's sucked your cock!"
does little to hide the fact that he has had a face-lift and hair transplants
[Carfagna] has undergone a major makeover since her days on television, when she favored short skirts.... "They've seen my ass even in Germany" [is a popular online video about featuring Carfagna in her showgirl days]
[Berlusconi to Carfagna] "If I weren't already married, I'd marry you!" [he said at a public event, which led to a tabloid-crazed spat with Mrs. Berlusconi, Veronica Lario]
[A note passed to Berlusconi during a session of Parliament, which Berlusconi controls with the same amount of unchecked power as Vladimir Putin or, worse yet, Joseph Stalin]: "Dear [President], we accept romantic appointments only from you."

We'd reveal more, but we want you to enjoy the New Yorker article for yourself. See the Nov. 3 issue for the rest.

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Women Get Away With Affairs Because of Their Expert Lying, Says Woman Who Got Away With An Affair With Future British Prime Minister

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 30 Jul 2008 15:12:00 GMT

This is Edwina Currie, the conservative politician who cheated on her husband with married future British Prime Minister John Major. Edwina wrote a piece for the Daily Mail this week on the latest poll on cheaters and how they get away with it...

So a new survey has come up with the surprise revelation that women are just as likely to be unfaithful as men.
Why didn't anyone realise this earlier?
Simply, it seems, because we women are more wily. While men are likely to strut around bragging about their conquests - indeed, even exaggerating the scale of their extramarital infidelities - women, conversely, are apt to keep mum about theirs.
Two thousand women were questioned in a recent sex and relationship survey. One in six of them admitted to having adulterous sex.
But here's the revelation: while females almost invariably discover the truth when their spouses stray, women are adept at keeping their own infidelities secret.

Currie also points out the already-infamous recent interview given by Dame Eileen Atkins in which the 70-something actress confessed that Colin Farrell had repeatedly propositioned her one night a few years back, in which Atkins said:

'Women are more successful at infidelity than men - they're better liars.'

Interestingly, it was Currie who broke the news of the affair, more than a decade after it ended, in her 2002 autobiography. She later trashed Major for being sexist and racist and disparaged his work as Prime Minister. She also admitted that, after all that time, she still loved him...

Anyway, what do we think about this survey? Are woman better at conducting affairs (and getting away with them) because of their skills as liars?

Via the Daily Mail.

Iraqi Prime Minister Dares To Defy Bush, Lives To Retract it

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:00:00 GMT

Iraqi Prime Minister Kamal al-Maliki must have felt the full wrath of the Bush White House come down on him yesterday when he first responded to a question about Obama's troop withdrawal plan by saying the Senator's plan

"...talks about 16 months... that, we think, would be the right timeframe for a withdrawal, with the possibility of slight changes.”

Obama's opponent and the opposition party at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. reacted swiftly, but maybe not swiftly enough to fool anyone.

Soon after the story appeared in the media, with most outlets saying, "See, even the Prime Minister in Iraq, essential a Bush flunky, agrees we gotta have a withdrawal plan," Maliki's retraction was out, with the classic cover line "misunderstood and mistranslated." Nice try, but what about the lines that followed your support for his plan?

“Of course, this is by no means an election endorsement. Who they choose as their president is the Americans’ business,” he said. But then, apparently referring to Republican candidate John McCain’s more open-ended Iraq policy, Maliki said: “Those who operate on the premise of short time periods in Iraq today are being more realistic. Artificially prolonging the tenure of U.S. troops in Iraq would cause problems.”

Did the translator completely fabricate all of that as well? The conservative media tend to think so. But we tend to agree with New York Times reader Frank Caramelli, who commented:

What is very important and shouldn’t be missed: Maliki did not offer this comment last week when Condi Rice was there. That is very telling. Timing is everything. Maliki is nobody’s fool. And he’s probably darn sick and tired of those in the Bush Administration thinking he’s theirs.

Via the New York Times.

Italy's Prime Minister Accused of "Pimping Out" Young Starlets

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 14 Jul 2008 12:49:00 GMT

Mara Carfagna, we shit you not, is a member of the Italian cabinet.

Have you guys been following the meteoric rise, breathtaking fall, and meteoric rise of Italy's Prime Minister, Silvio Berlusconi? The 71-year-old king(pin) has been carrying on the good name of Italian politics for many years now, and this latest story of corruption, "pimping," and extramarital affairs with other politicians is but one of many sensational highlights...

Here's the rundown:

1) Italian prosecutors suspect Berlusconi of corruption, so they decide to tap his phone.

2) Berlusconi, who is married, is heard to say "inappropriate" and "raunchy" remarks about "the most glamorous" politician in Italy, "Mara Carfagna, the 32-year-old Minister for Equal Opportunities... a former model and television showgirl." Berlusconi reportedly remarked on an earlier recording that he would marry Carfagna if he was only single. His wife responded with a memorable public outcry.

3) On another recording, the Prime Minister

pressuring Agostino Sacca, head of drama at the state-owned RAI broadcaster, to give parts to several attractive young actors.
In one exchange, Mr Sacca promised Mr Berlusconi that he would find work for Elena Russo. Mr Berlusconi tells him: "If you can do me this favour, it's as if you're doing it for her. But you're doing this favour directly for me." Mr Berlusconi also described the actors and dancers whom he admires as his "little butterflies".

4) The outrage has been unanimous and brutal. One politico noted that Bill Clinton's sex scandal was bad enough, but at least he didn't make "Monica Lewinsky... Secretary of State."

Antonio di Pietro, a former prosecutor and now the leader of the small centre-left Italy of Values party, accused Mr Berlusconi of being a "pimp" who is "busy finding work for showgirls" rather than playing the role of a statesman.

5) Berlusconi promised to do an interview in which he would lash out against this kind of "porn politics," but canceled at the last minute.

6) Calling judges and others that leak to the press "a 'cancer' on democracy," the PM pushed a law through the legislature that specifically imprisons journalists who publish recorded phone calls before trials where those calls are used as evidence.

7) On Wednesday, Berlusconi will learn whether he is to be tried for corruption. If he does end up facing a judge, there will likely be a flood of new recordings in the papers...

Via The Australian: Berlusconi Accused of Pimping His "Butterflies"

More photos of Mara here.

Gemma Garrett Sexes Up British Politics

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 21 May 2008 19:50:00 GMT

Miss Great Britain 2008, in the elongated form of Gemma Garrett, will be splayed across a ballot box near you on Thursday...

If, of course, you're lucky enough to live in the UK.

“I’m campaigning on lots of different issues but the main one is about pay for British troops. They should be on a premium salary when they’re in war zones and away from their families, even when they’re in Northern Ireland."

In her ruthless and relentless grab at power on the newly formed Beauties For Britain ticket (we're not kidding), beginning her rise with a simple quest for Membership in Parliament, she has met with strong and solid opposition, including jealousy at her good looks, particularly from the elderly:

She shouted at me: ‘Do you even know how to spell Britain?’ I couldn’t believe it. “I just walked away even though I was quite angry about it. I thought that was the best way for an ambassador for Britain to behave." [Daily Star]

Hear, hear, Gemma. Take the high road, even if that means no more of these hot, hot photos of you once you're in office. (But please do continue to be amazingly hot, have your heart in the right place, and if there's a good sex scandal in the works, please let us know before the Mail gets it.)

For more pictures, see the Daily Star story and gallery, with additional photos here.

EXCLUSIVE: Scanner Reveals Minnie Driver's Baby Daddy

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 08 May 2008 19:12:00 GMT

For the first time. An exclusive. A world premiere event.

Minnie Driver, at six months pregnant and due this summer, has so far refused to reveal the name of her baby's father, but has dropped enough clues that our state of the art investigation network (i.e. Google) has cracked her secret code...

The only clues Driver will offer about the identity of her "baby daddy" are that he is English, and "sort of in the same business," and that they have evaded detection because "he's really busy, like me." [Independent UK]

Hmm... he is "sort of" in the same business... no, Danny Molder is taken, ruling out any possibility he could be on the other side of the camera. So, he's an actor. We rule out any other logical possibilities (like the fact that she's a musician as well, so he could be involved in music.)

"He is English." Ian McKellan? Impossible. Patrick Stewart? Nope. Blake Fielder-Civil? Unusual, but very probable. Seriously, she just narrowed it down to two people-- and Daniel Radcliffe was probably not even legal yet, so that rules him out. Nope, ladies and gentlemen, there is only one more remaining candidate... someone you all know and love... someone who is an admitted lesbian... well, a lesbian in the form of a straight man who wears drag and sleeps exclusively with women... someone who is so powerful and dangerous that Minnie Driver dare not speakest his name... the next British Prime Minister...

Yes, Eddie Izzard. We're pretty sure. Although if we're wrong, well just change this post and insert the correct male person's headshot here... or just paste it over Eddie's face. Either way, you heard it here first.