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While You Were Sleeping: Lindsay Lohan's Crushing News

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 14:02:00 GMT

The Black Crowes are taking recording back to the era of the basement-- the basement tapes, that is. They'll perform four sold-out concerts at Levon Helm's house and use them for their next record.

Watch Richard Simmons, our personal hero, attack a CNN interviewer's foot live on air.

A four-year-old boy named Nathan Beavers shot his eighteen-year-old male babysitter for...? Ha-- you guessed wrong-- Beavers shot the babysitter for stepping on his foot.

Gaza kids spoke out about how the violence has ruined their lives.

John Travolta's kid's death was caused by a seizure disorder. (Damn, all this sad news about children today-- if anyone hears about a kid sending his allowance to Darfur, let us know.)

Patricia Arquette is getting divorced. Rihanna is getting engaged. And, as we've already mentioned, Jennifer Love Hewitt isn't getting married...

...and Lindsay Lohan is allegedly done with Samantha Ronson. Think she got dumped?

Related:

Caption This: Lindsay Lohan's Boobs And Sam Ronson's Eyeline

Every Time Lindsay Lohan Has a Drink, Deborah Norville Gets a New Fur Coat

The Halo Wedding: More Pathetic Than the Second Life Divorce?

Cat Scratch Fever: LiLo and Sam Ronson in New Year's Eve Girlfight

Colleen Kane — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 19:01:00 GMT

As much as we enjoy reading the tawdry British rags (i.e., mostly looking at photos), we suspect The Daily Mail might just be making this one up for ultimate titllation: Lindsay Lohan, and Samantha Ronson, sexy "lady" lesbians, fighting, each other, in an alleyway.

Video after the jump.

The pair rang in the new year by hosting a party at the Miami nighclub Mansion, until the latest fracas began as seen in this video. One viewer interpreted LiLo's rage was over Sam's selection of a Britney Spears song. (So like, is that the kind of stuff she plays as a professional DJ? Hm.)

The duo then took it outside nearby alley.

"When I storm off, you are supposed to follow me!"' a "source" claims Lindsay screeched at Sam.

The beatdown continued later in their hotel room, which they reportedly trashed.

Here's the best part, though, as quoted from a source in The New York Post via The Daily Mail: "It was a really gross alley. There was a bum [tramp] eating a sandwich watching the whole thing."

Lesson for the New Year: bum = tramp in England.

Lindsay Lohan: Lies My Father Told Me

Hot or Not: Michael Musto's Lindsay Lohan's Marilyn Monroe

Image: WENN/Daily Mail

The Top 10 Yahoo Searches of 2008

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 21:28:00 GMT

We never understand why year-end best of polls come out before the year is over (meaning: we understood that the media tries to capitalize on the year before everyone stops carrying, but not why anyone accepts them as fact.) Top 10 movies, as polled by the critics who have seen all the year's releases already, but what if there's a major prostitution scandal and everyone starts looking up someone named Joanna Esmerelda Dupois in absurd numbers?

Yahoo isn't worried about our pesky little inquiries. It has already released their top 10 list for 2008 and although we've already revealed their #1 choice, once we caught wind of the runner-ups, we felt an overwhelming urge to burden you with this information...

10. American Idol. You mean, people don't get enough of this shit in its four hours per week?

9. Angelina Jolie. Must've been those $14 million baby pictures everyone was trying to catch a glimpse of without having to buy a tabloid magazine. Say hello to the free world wide web, People.

8. Lindsay Lohan. She would've been our guess for the #1 slot, which shows you how much we know about what men find most attractive.

7. Naruto. Apparently, some sort of cartoon character. See #8.

6. Jessica Alba. Yes, she has her assets, but none of them include talent, interesting personality, or newsmaking lifestyle. Why, why, why?

5. RuneScape. We're starting to feel a little bit left out of the loop here...

4. Miley Cyrus. We're almost relieved to see Hannah, scion of the Montana's, on this rundown, for reasons of familiarity only.

3. Barack Obama. Here's hoping the most popular related searches do not include the phrases "is a Muslim" or "and mom's nude photos."

2. WWE. Scary... although we figured eight-year-old boys are computer-trained these days...

1. Britney Spears. What hasn't been said already about a woman who was a has-been at age 7 and hasn't done a damn thing worth paying attention to since? Let's make this her last appearance on this or any list, please...

Via Yahoo.

Related:

Caption This: Britney is Keeping Her Kids This Time

Sloppy Seconds: The Curious Case of 130,000 Missing Breasts

While You Were Sleeping: Who's #1 on Yahoo?

Sloppy Seconds: Divorce for Amy Winehouse?

While You Were Sleeping: Leftover Edition

Every Time Lindsay Lohan Has a Drink, Deborah Norville Gets a New Fur Coat

Nicole Pasulka — Wed, 26 Nov 2008 20:33:00 GMT

This is a video of Lindsay Lohan pouring Red Bull into her vodka. Or vodka into her Red Bull. Or vodka and Red Bull from her mouth into Samantha Ronson's mouth. Or just mainlining it straight into her veins, the footage is grainy and we can't really hear what Deborah Norville is saying.

If you ask us, the real news item here is that anyone believed all this Lindsay goes to rehab, sobers up crap in the first place. We have nothing bad to say about genuine treatment for addiction. But for the dirty, lowdown on celebrity rehab center Wonderland, we direct you to Amanda Fortini's profile of the facility in this week's New Yorker. In the first paragraph we learn that Howard Samuels, executive director of the Wonderland center has a publicist. Not surprising, except his publicist is Cathy Griffin, a woman who "spent thirty years covering celebrities as a journalist for, among other outlets, “Hard Copy” and “A Current Affair.”" She also happens to be "Liz Smith’s “West Coast legwoman.”"

Now, why would a celebrity like Lindsay Lohan go to a rehab facility where the operators feed information directly to gossip mills?

Hmmm.

It's too bad sobriety and heterosexuality are just not interesting to US Weekly readers. Or us, for that matter. But in the interest of supporting healthy lifestyles and good decision-making send us a clip of Lindsay playing with abandoned puppies or walking old ladies across busy intersections. We will totally eat up those publicity stunts, too.

Related:

Scanner : lindsay lohan

While You Were Sleeping: Lindsay Lohan's Crushing News

Caption This: Lindsay Lohan's Boobs And Sam Ronson's Eyeline

Every Time Lindsay Lohan Has a Drink, Deborah Norville Gets a New Fur Coat

The Halo Wedding: More Pathetic Than the Second Life Divorce?

Cat Scratch Fever: LiLo and Sam Ronson in New Year's Eve Girlfight

Lindsay Lohan: Lies My Father Told Me

Hot or Not: Michael Musto's Lindsay Lohan's Marilyn Monroe

The Top 10 Yahoo Searches of 2008

Caption This: Britney is Keeping Her Kids This Time

Sloppy Seconds: The Curious Case of 130,000 Missing Breasts

While You Were Sleeping: Who's #1 on Yahoo?

Sloppy Seconds: Divorce for Amy Winehouse?

While You Were Sleeping: Leftover Edition

Every Time Lindsay Lohan Has a Drink, Deborah Norville Gets a New Fur Coat

Lindsay Lohan: Lies My Father Told Me

Michael Lohan Sells Out Lindsay Once Again

Lindsay Lohan: Lies My Father Told Me

Since When Did Lindsay Lohan's Blog Posts Constitute Hard Hitting News?