Scanner : ipod

Sloppy Seconds: Oral Sex is Bad, Mmmmkay?

Emily Farris — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 22:33:00 GMT

Apparently, we're one step closer to having eternal sunshine in our spotless minds. Except, instead of forgetting about Jim Carrey doctors might be able to make us forget how much we love hamburgers. And pulled pork. And cheesecake. And those little biscuits at the seafood place. And that would be so, so awesome. [NYT]

We sort of wish we would have waited to break our wrist at the Down & Derby that Cosmo Baker is spinning at instead of the one (about this time last year) that featured some DJ we'd never even heard of. Anyway, if you're in New York and a better roller skater than we are, you should check this out. We will be in town for it, but we will not be seeing you there. [TheKeyRoom]

An iPod you can control with your facial expressions? No thanks. One day we're walking down the street trying to skip from the Katy Perry version of "I Kissed a Girl" to the Jill Sobule version. Next thing you know the guy is telling the cops he could have sworn we were begging him to put his penis in our mouth. [Reuters]

That bisexual reality star we're no longer allowed to talk about thinks that she and Meghan McCain are very similar because they're both Scorpios and they both...wait for it... "have strong opinions about things." [Us]

While Farrah Fawcett fights an uphill battle against cancer her son Redmond can't help but get into a little bit of trouble. [RadarOnline]

Patrick Swayze seems to be faring a little better in the cancer department, though it's all still so sad. [People]

Here's yet another reminder that oral sex will give you mouth AIDS or cancer or something like that. [Jossip]

Speaking of oral... we have to admit that though we've heard her name, we have no idea who Aubrey O'Day is, but apparently Kathy Griffin likes the taste of her mouth. [FadedYouth]

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From the Medical News Vault: Male Masturbation 'Cuts Cancer Risk'

PapSmeared: Nick Hogan, Bringing Douchebag Back

Emily Farris — Tue, 20 Jan 2009 16:23:00 GMT

We're sure that girl didn't want to have a conversation with you, anyway.

[Image]

Our Favorite Dumb Criminal: Burglar Leaves Sex Tape At the Scene

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 20:47:00 GMT

"...Oh Alabama, the devil fools with the best-laid plan..."

An as-yet-unidentified burglar, seen in this photo, obviously didn't have any Neil Young as the mood music on his sex tape. We know for a fact because the police have the sex tape and they're using it to publicly identify a local menace...

Police really want to nab this guy, thanks to his responsibility for at least a handful of the four than 50 car break-ins in just one precinct in Mobile in the last month. Sources say the dude bailed out of his stolen Ford Explorer, leaving behind iPods and ancient listening devices known as stereos, which ancient man is believed to have used before the advent of Napster.

"...Your SUV / has a wheel in the ditch / and a wheel on the track..."

Perhaps the only disappointing part of this story is that our sole glimpse into the sex tape is the photo above, which isn't exactly appealing, unless you like your men to look like gleeful stoners who are thinking of putting it in your butt. At least his teeth are all right and his mustache only fairly hideous. Also, he's probably the kind of guy who makes sure to do it doggystyle so he can stare into his own eyes in the bedroom mirror-- the cops say the video doesn't even feature his female partner's face, since it's mainly a self-portrait of a man enjoying sex.

Via AL.com.

Related:

Creepy Dudes Now Using Sex Tapes To Blackmail You Into... Giving Them Nude Photos?

Mini-Me Makes Up For Size With Stamina In Bed

China and Japan At War Again, This Time Over Who Has the Best Sex Tape Scandal

Scanner Brian's Year in Review

Josh Hartnett Sex Tape Results Are In

Sloppy Seconds: More Sex and the City?

Emily Farris — Mon, 05 Jan 2009 23:53:00 GMT

Ada Calhoun, from our not so slutty sister site Babble, weighs in on Facebook's nipple ban. [TIME]

We're usually all about Kelly Clarkson's girl power lyrics, but not so much with her new single "My Life Would Suck Without You." [FadedYouth]

Speaking of girl power, did you know it's Women's Self-Empowerment Week? And do we really need a Women's Self-Empowerment Week? [Jezebel]

Jennifer Love Hewitt is back on the market, in case you're interested. (We're guessing you're not). [People]

Steve Jobs is not dying. He will continue to over-charge us for upgrades, monitors not covered under warranty and warranties. [Yahoo!]

Rich, happy, healthy Gwyneth Paltrow shares her secrets for shedding those pesky holiday pounds: just cut out meat, dairy, fat, potatoes, tomatoes, sugar, alcohol and caffeine. Easy! [Us]

Crazy lady and and Sex and the City stylist Patricia Field is starting a rumor: that there will be a Sex and the City: The Movie sequel. Are you excited? We are. Shut up. [MTV]

Memo to the Telegraph: If You Cover Up, You're Not Naked

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 21:50:00 GMT

The above photo of Marisa Miller is advertised as a "nudie pic." We're pretty sure she's actually naked under that iPod (a great Christmas gift, by the way!), but we have to question the supposed nudity in this shot of five young students of Cambridge University...

Okay, sure, they're probably nekkid (although they're all wearing boots and the girl on the far left clearly has shorts or underwear on), but what about the fact that these damn lambs keep getting in the way? They may be naked, but is this technically a "nude photo?"

This was a photo shoot the five Cambridge University gals did for a charity calendar, being sold for nine English pounds (coincidentally their combined body weight), which is for blah blah blah a Veterinary Hospital blah blah.

Photo via the Telegraph.

Related:

Vicar Happened to Be Naked When He Fell On the Potato... With His Ass

Cops Stripped Of Duties After Wild Hooker Party

Top 5 Susan Sarandon Sex Scenes

Agyness Deyn Looks Even More Like A Boy In Sketch Form

Is "Tech Sex" Somewhere Between Cyber Sex and Technical Sex?

Scanner's Deals of the Day

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 17:03:00 GMT

For those of you about to work, we salute you. We're basically taking the day off like other fools, celebrating Buy Nothing Day in our own special way.

But if you're the shopaholics this country wants you to be, here are our picks for the best deals of the day...

AMAZON (while supplies last, of course):

Apple iPod Touch for $199

Pioneer XM Satellite Radio for $49 (starting at 9pm EST/6pm PST)

MACMALL:

$200 off the new MacBook Pro

DEALHACK:

DVR100 Recordable DVD Player for $50 (refurbished, for a limited time)

Buy one Gap sweater, get the second at 50% off

B&H PHOTO:

Panasonic Mini-DV Camcorder for $179

BUY.COM:

House - Season 3 for $20

Canon Laser Printer - Copier - Scanner - Fax for $75

Wii Console Bundle w/M&M's Kart Racing, Super Smash Bros Brawl, Carnival Games, Wii Sports, and Sonic Riders: Zero Gravity for $374

CIRCUIT CITY:

Sony Vaio Laptop for $1100

Free $25 iTunes card with the purchase of any $149-and-up iPod

POWELL'S BOOKS:

Signed first edition of Malcom Gladwell's Outliers for $28

The Amy Sedaris book I Like You: Hospitality Under the Influence for $11.19

HBO.COM:

20% off plus free shipping

Flight of the Conchords set of 4 pint glasses for $50 (not including discounts, it seems)

OFFICE MAX:

GPS System for $99

Microsoft Office for $49

If you find anything else particularly noteworthy, let us know in the comments.

Related:

This Thanksgiving, Just Shut Up and Be Thankful for Your Faithful Mate (Who You Probably Don't Really Have)

Arlo Guthrie Hopes You Can Still Get Anything You Want This Thanksgiving

Scanner Emily's Savory Sweet Potato Recipe

Video of the Day: Happy Thanksgiving

back to dailyscanner.com

To Buy or Not to Buy: The iPhone

Emily Farris — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 19:20:00 GMT

Scanner readers, I need your help.

I'm considering purchasing an iPhone.

I recently switched to AT&T after a seven-year abusive relationship with Sprint. I purchased a Samsung BlackJack which is fine, or was fine until it had a major malfunction. The company replaced it for free but, yet again, my email isn't working so well. I've been considering getting an iPhone, but I don't think they're as sexy as everyone else does (and I'm completely devoted to Mac products). I really like my little raised keyboard and appreciate the fact that I can drop my phone three times a day and it still, somehow, miraculously works. However, I lost my iPod at camp, so think it's rather silly to buy a new iPod when I could just get an iPhone for $50 more....right?

For those of you who have them, what do you think? How's the battery life? Is the email feature really as great as everyone says it is? Will it get me laid? (Just joking. I sadly know it won't.)

Now, before you go blaming me for asking such a ridiculous question on Scanner, one advantage would be that I could blog from anywhere. So next time I see a topless lady on the street, not only could I snap a picture, I could post it right away. So there.

Help? Please and thank you.

Related:

Look Out: More Hackers Targeting Macs & iPhones

While You Were Sleeping: The iPhone Crisis

Sloppy Seconds: Pregnancy Pact Girl Speaks Out, "There Was No Pact"

Teenagers Can't Even Go Swimming Without Facebook Anymore

Scanner Emily on the New MacBook Air: Enh

Smell Yo D*ck: The Official Video

My Life Just Flashed Before My Eyes: The Evolution of the Cell Phone

Sloppy Seconds: Hillary Clinton Nominated For President?

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 20:51:00 GMT

Would someone please make one of these for us and send it by mail to Scanner, New York, NY? Of course, you'll need to get us a nano, too...

Natalie Wood's longtime lover planned, at one point, to murder Warren Beatty. The world doesn't know how close it came to losing Bulworth.

The decision by America's Next Top Model to feature a transgender contestant has been met with praise from at least one group: GLAAD.

Rejoice, travelers: Gay sex is now A-OK with Panama!

Meghan McCain just wet her pants: the Hills spinoff is taking on D.C.

Christian Bale will not be charged with any hitting or not hitting of any family members.

And Hillary Clinton will be nominated at this month's Democratic National Convention. Symbolically, of course-- or so they promise us. Who wants odds that somebody's going to take this gimme and pull a coup?

Related:

Sloppy Seconds: Update On The Christian Bale Story

McCain Blogette: Hot or Not?

What Do We Think About Britain's Missing Top Model?

Who Would You Rather: Elizabeth Berkley or Tyra Banks?

The Top 5 Hollywood Players Who Did Porn

What Do We Think About Vanity Fair's Fake Celebrities?

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 09 Jul 2008 13:58:00 GMT

Who are these nyphms, Vanity Fair, and why should we care about them?

Here's the abridged survey:

AMANDA SEYFRIED Age: 22. Hometown: Allentown, Pennsylvania. Breakthrough roles: Karen in Mean Girls, Sarah on HBO’s Big Love. Upcoming film: Mamma Mia!

What We Like About Her:

Jimmy Choo or Christian Louboutin? “Prada. I don’t have any, but they make a woman’s leg look fantastic.” Favorite designer? “Miu Miu. I can’t afford it, but I love it.” Who do you dream of working with one day? Michael Caine. Xbox, Wii, or PlayStation? “Wii, because of Guitar Hero.”

What Makes Us A Little Weary:

Favorite movie? “Romeo and Juliet with Claire Danes. She was the first girl I related to in some way.” Hybrid or Escalade? “Audi. Maybe I should drive a hybrid. I do have a shirt that says, ‘Go Green.’ ”

EMMA ROBERTS Age: 17. Hometown: Rhinebeck, New York. Breakthrough roles: Addie Singer on Nickelodeon’s Unfabulous, title role in Nancy Drew. Upcoming film: Wild Child. First “Hollywood” moment? “I guess after my television show started airing, and I would be walking around the mall or just out with friends, and girls would come up to me and be like, ‘Oh my God, we love your show, we love this!’ And I would look around still, and be like, ‘Are they really talking to me?’ ”

What We Like About Her:

Chuck Taylors or Nikes? Chuck Taylors. Favorite movie? Almost Famous. American Idol or Lost? “Lost! I’m a huge Lost fan.”

What Makes Us A Little Weary:

Number of shoes in your closet? “Probably a little under 50.” Style icon? “I love the way Mary-Kate and Ashley dress. I know that’s probably cliché to say.”

BLAKE LIVELY Age: 20. Hometown: Burbank, California. Breakthrough roles: Bridget in Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Serena van der Woodsen in Gossip Girl. Upcoming film: Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2.

What We Like About Her:

First “Hollywood” moment? “I hope not ever.” Jimmy Choo or Christian Louboutin? “Jimmy Choo and Chanel. I can’t stand it: the security guards know me there.” Favorite guy’s guy? “I’m dating Brad Pitt.” Favorite girl’s girl? Angelina Jolie. Favorite snack? “Whatever’s greasier and cheesier the better.” Hybrid or Escalade? “Hybrid. Even if anybody picked the Escalade they wouldn’t say it, ‘cause it’d be, like, bombed.”

What Makes Us A Little Weary:

Favorite movie? Wizard of Oz, Moulin Rouge!, Romeo and Juliet.

KRISTEN STEWART Age: 18. Hometown: North Hollywood, California. Breakthrough roles: Jodie Foster’s daughter in Panic Room, Tracy in Into the Wild. Upcoming films: Twilight, Adventureland, and What Just Happened?

What We Like About Her:

Chuck Taylors or Nikes? Converse. Favorite designer? “Oh, I don’t know. Anything that’s beat up. I kind of like to look like a hobo.” Role model? Jodie Foster. BlackBerry or iPhone? “I’m getting a BlackBerry. I don’t even have an e-mail address. I just need a phone that’s not gonna break.” What’s on your iPod? Van Morrison, the Beatles, the Rolling Stones. Last book you read? Under the Banner of Heaven, by Jon Krakauer. Morning or evening? “I’m a night person. I mean, look at me.” Hybrid or Escalade? “A ‘95 Toyota Tacoma.”

What Makes Us A Little Weary (okay, this didn't really make us weary):

Boy crush? “My boyfriend, Michael Angarano!”

Obviously, Blake Lively is a celebrity and Scanner digs her bad attitude and sort-of just-out-of-an-angry-publicist's-reach no-bullshit way of conducting interviews (thank God, there may be hope for intelligent life to come out of this generation), but what about the rest of them? Is Vanity Fair just manufacturing fame or will these four go on to big things? (Don't forget that many of the Vanity Fair cover models, including Gretchen Mol, peaked with their VF covers and haven't been heard from since.)

Photo and interview via Vanity Fair.

Who Would You Rather?: Kanye West vs. Jay Z

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 20:33:00 GMT

Both of these dapper gentlemen hip-hop stars were in the news today, one for doing something gentlemanly, the other for merely existing on an iPod.

Who cares why we want to know-- we just do. Who would you rather?

Jay Z was on Barack Obama's iPod and Kanye had to apologize for his seriously-late arrival at Bonnaroo. Oh well-- we forgive Kanye and obviously, being on Obama's iPod elevates Jay in our eyes... but it's up to you to decide.

Curious About What's on Barack Obama's iPod?

Emily Farris — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 19:19:00 GMT

Too bad, we're going to tell you anyway.

Bob Dylan. Yo-Yo Ma. Sheryl Crow. Jay-Z. These aren't musical acts in a summer concert series: They're artists featured on Barack Obama's iPod.

"I have pretty eclectic tastes," the Democratic presidential contender said in an interview to be published in Friday's issue of Rolling Stone.

Growing up in the '70s, Obama said, he listened to the Rolling Stones, Elton John and Earth, Wind & Fire. Stevie Wonder is his musical hero from the era. The Stones' "Gimme Shelter" tops his favorites from the band.

The Illinois senator's playlist contains these musicians, along with about 30 songs from Dylan and the singer's "Blood on the Tracks" album. Jazz legends Miles Davis, John Coltrane and Charlie Parker are also in the mix.

"Actually, one of my favorites during the political season is 'Maggie's Farm,'" Obama said of one of Dylan's tracks. "It speaks to me as I listen to some of the political rhetoric."

In the song, Dylan sings about trying be himself, "but everybody wants you to be just like them."

Luckily for Obama, most of those artists support his campaign.

[Yahoo: Rap, rock, classical — music to Obama's ears]

Related:

While You Were Sleeping: Bruce Springsteen Endorsed Somebody, And it Wasn't McCain

Bob Dylan Sees The Chimes of Freedom Flashing

Who Would You Rather, Father-Son Edition: Jakob Dylan vs. Bob Dylan?

Breast Motion Finally Good for More Than Just Moving Pasties in Circles

Nicole Pasulka — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 18:37:00 GMT

Earlier, Scanner Brian told you about the hiker who used her bra to signal for help. Well, it turns out that tittie carriage could not only save your life, but also power your iPod. Over at Slate, we learned that scientists have been studying the "physics of breast motion" for a while now and one perk (!) of all this research could be a bra that turns boob motion in to raw, unfettered, iPod fueling energy.

It all comes down to nanowire technology, lightening packs and the power of the T-I-T-T-Y. The article's author Adrienne So, for one, is ready to put the twins to work.

If someone were to engineer a kinetically powered bra, even one that isn't quite as comfortable as the old-fashioned kind, I'd be intrigued—and I might just start looking at my breasts in a different light. Maybe it's not very sexy to see breasts as a pair of batteries, but oil prices are so high, people are jogging to work. It may be time for breasts to start pulling their own weight.

Hey, the prospect of saving money on batteries and electricity could even inspire us to start wearing a bra. Now, if only we could figure out how to jump a car battery with our nipples we'd be totally unstoppable.

Holiday Gift Guide: Compact iPod Speakers

Michael Martin — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 00:00:00 GMT

Because I like nothing more than to force my iPod library onto unsuspecting passers-by (it’s quite eclectic; even includes the theme song to Reading Rainbow), I've hinted to loved ones that these compact speakers, available at the MoMa store, would be a sort of awesome gift. ($28, momastore.org) — Steph Auleri