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PapSmeared: Holly Madison Leads the Bikini Parade

Emily Farris — Fri, 15 May 2009 16:12:00 GMT

While You Were Sleeping: Lindsay Lohan's Desperate Living

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 14 May 2009 14:24:00 GMT

Holly Madison rebounded from Hugh Hefner with... Russell Brand?

We have to agree: this or any other ad for the pill is going to piss off the stuffy-butthole-people.

A quick thinking teenage boy saved his 4-year-old sister from being kidnapped when he actually raced after and caught up to the truck she was being driven off in.

Another teenage boy, who needs to spend more time thinking, is going to jail for setting another guy's dick and balls on fire.

This is gonna be grand: Martin Scorsese is making a movie about Sinatra.

Elton John was there for Eminem in his hour of need, helping him through the painful process of rehab.

Emily mentioned this yesterday: Shanna Moakler resigned from the pageant board following yesterday's press conference on Carrie Prejean. Did you know that she was also Miss USA and a Playboy centerfold? Hmmm...

The marriage bra is... uh... useless? A major turnoff? Creepy? Stupid? All of the above and more?

Lindsay Lohan's house is in such shit shape, complete with garbage everywhere, that the police thought it had been ransacked when they responded to a tripped alarm.

Related:

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While You Were Sleeping: The Top Gunning Lesbian

"You Traitor Pig!"

While You Were Sleeping: Lindsay Lohan's Facebook

PA DA Threatening to Jail 11-Year-Olds For Sexting

Kendra Wilkinson's Stripper Poles: Quality You Can Twirl On

Emily Farris — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 19:04:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Girl Next Door Kendra Wilkinson has forgone the celebrity trend of launching her own clothing line, and skipped right to designing her own line of stripper poles...

Read more...

While You Were Sleeping: Oprah's School's Sex Scandal

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 31 Mar 2009 13:08:00 GMT

Attention, ladies: Gerard Butler's next movie features the actor in a nude scene.

Bruno has been slapped with an NC-17 rating for pervasive sexxx.

Josh Hartnett is in the hospital for stomach pains. Cue gerbil allegations in three, two...

The weirdest (but maybe most interesting) story in ages: the woman who starved her 1-year-old son to death because her cult would not let the boy eat unless he said "Amen" pled guilty in the most unusual plea deal we've ever heard of. Prosecutors claim that the only way they could get her to take the deal was to promise-- and this they had to do in open court-- that, should the child be resurrected (as his mother claims he will one day), the charges are withdrawn. God bless Baltimore, baby.

A boy (age unknown) won a $2.3 million negligence settlement against the physician who botched his circumcision. I wouldn't do it for anything less than moving the decimal point two places to the right.

Oprah Winfrey's famous South African school is seeing its second sex scandal in as many years.

Sarah Palin has to pick a Democrat to fill a state Senate seat in Alaska. So, of course, she has a Republican switch his voter registration, say that there was something "wrong" with it, and take the seat. This is totally excusable politics, except for the fact that they're so sneaky and lie about their reasoning, the Democrats who have to accept this will never do it. Can Governor Palin do anything right?

A bunch of Somali pirates attacked... a decoy ship filled with troops looking for pirates to capture. Nice.

And Holly Madison claims to have insisted on "minimal" Photoshopping at Playboy during her time there.

"Girl Next Door" Holly Isn't The Best "DWTS" Dancer, But She Has Hot Girlfriends [VIDEO]

Emily Farris — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 18:58:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Disclaimer: For a midseason replacement, Holly did just fine. She’d only had 6 days of rehearsal time prior to her debut cha-cha. And we tend to find these early Dancing With the Stars Performances super duper 7th grade cotillion awkward, anyway. Also, that outfit looked great on her. Not 7th grade cotillion at all. She did fine.

Now, you take a look:

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"Dancing With The Stars": Jewel's Out, "Girl Next Door" Holly Madison Is In

Emily Farris — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 19:52:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Jewel and Access Hollywood host Nancy O'Dell have both dropped out of Dancing With the Stars, as coincidentally, both women have suffered from injuries that prevent them from dancing on the show.

"Girl Next Door" Holly Is Psyched To Be Single

Emily Farris — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 20:41:00 GMT

VIA THE REMOTE ISLAND: Although the former Head Girl In Charge won’t discuss her split from Criss Angel, the bunny does have some pretty strong opinions about men in general.

Read more...

Sloppy Seconds: Annie Leibovitz's Financial Woes

Emily Farris — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 23:39:00 GMT

Netflix will offer a streaming-only service, but apparently it still won't be available to Mac users. [Wired]

Former Hugh Hefner flame and original Girl Next Door Holly Madison has split from Criss Angel after nearly four months. [Yahoo!]

It looks like there's some not-so-hot lesbian action coming to Desperate Housewives' Wisteria Lane. [Us]

Maybe John Mayer really is that into Jennifer Aniston? [People]

What happens when a skinny reporter goes to fashion week in a fat suit? [Jezebel]

Annie Leibovitz took out a loan against her photographs to pay off her mortgage debt. When Leibovitz's long-time partner Susan Sontag died in 2004, she left several properties to the photographer, who has struggled to afford to keep them. [AfterEllen]

[Image]

Meet Hugh Hefner's New Old Lady

Emily Farris — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 15:53:00 GMT

Well, we call her an old lady because she's 22—a whopping three years older than the 19-year-old twins (their parents must be so proud), Kristina and Karissa Shannon, who have apparently been hanging all by their lonesome with Hugh after his last three girlfriends departed.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet Crystal Harris who, on her MySpace blog, wrote "I'm a good girl, for the most part."

That's her, directly to the right of Hugh. You know, the one who's not a twin (we must say it again: their parents must be so proud). We know another pretty blonde is so very exciting.

[FadedYouth: HUGH’S LATEST GAL PAL]

Related:

The Day Hugh Hefner Almost Swallowed a Sex Toy

Who Will Play Playboy Hugh Hefner in the Story of His Life?

Hugh Hefner's Teenage Twin Girlfriends: Girls in the Cell Next Door

Who Would You Rather: Joe "Boobies" Francis vs. Hugh Hefner?

[Image]

While You Were Sleeping: The Liposuction Car

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 14:08:00 GMT

A rogue church threatened to publicly broadcast the details of a married woman's sex life after she refused to break up with her secret lover. (They sent her a letter announcing their intentions, even though she'd quit attending services there.)

A former member of the White House's inner circle, who was all set to testify in court against Karl Rove and his rigging of the 2004 Presidential election in Ohio, died in a plane crash over the weekend. We were waiting for the mainstream media to pick up on this story and at least dismiss it-- of course, they've so far chosen to ignore even a cursory mention, even though it's several days old.

Sam Mendes spoke out about watching the sex scene between his wife and Leo...

Sam Mendes says directing wife Kate Winslet as she grappled with Leonardo DiCaprio in the steamier scenes in "Revolutionary Road" was "a profoundly weird experience" - so weird that he couldn't watch it. Instead, he monitored the action on a video... [PageSix]

Prosecutors don't seem to care about our rights. They don't care what the jury decides, either.

A Beverly Hills plastic surgeon fled the country when it was discovered he was powering his SUV with what he'd gleaned off his liposuction patients.

Possibly under the assumption they would lose, the Screen Actors Guild delayed a vote on whether or not to strike.

According to one paper, the economy is not stopping women from spending ridiculous amounts of money on makeup. The "lipstick effect" is in play, just as it was during the Great Depression.

A man tried to get his murder case retried, claiming two jurors had sex with one another and the guards overseeing them were inspired for some of the same. Thanks, M.

And breaking up with Hugh Hefner somehow landed Holly Madison the cover of Playboy.

The Day Hugh Hefner Almost Swallowed a Sex Toy

Emily Farris — Wed, 17 Dec 2008 20:03:00 GMT

Plugging his new book "Mr. Playboy" in an interview with Extra, Hugh Hefner opens up about his split with Holly Madison, who he would like to pose for playboy and the day he nearly choked on a sex toy.

We're not all that surprised that Hefner wants Angelina Jolie and/or Scarlett Johansson to pose for his magazine or that he was "blindsided" by his break-up from Madison, but we will now most certainly buy the "Mr. Playboy" based purely on what he claims is its "most shocking revelation."

“Probably an incident that occurred back in the late seventies where I almost swallowed a sex toy.”

We can't imagine a better way to sell a book. Seriously, Hef, you know how to leave a crowd hanging. What was going on when you almost swallowed it? Did you choke? What kind of sex toy? And, most importantly, what were you wearing? (Imaginary scenarios encouraged in the comments section!)

Yet another book to add to our grown-up Christmas list.

[Faded Youth: HUGH HEFNER: “I ALMOST SWALLOWED A SEX TOY”]

Related:

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Who Would You Rather: Joe "Boobies" Francis vs. Hugh Hefner?

Who Will Play Playboy Hugh Hefner in the Story of His Life?

Naked Pamela Anderson and Old Hugh Hefner: Unblurred

Some Lucky Israelis Will Hang With Hugh Hefner

Hugh Hefner's Teenage Twin Girlfriends: Girls in the Cell Next Door

Naked Pamela Anderson and Old Hugh Hefner: Unblurred

Megan Fox Is So Hot Right Now, GQ Can Just Recycle Her Photos Every Month

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 18 Nov 2008 18:41:00 GMT

Megan Fox, who will not be playing Wonder Woman, despite previous reports, and was the only woman shortlisted for GQ's Man of the Year is still the #1 woman on the internet. (Well, except for Keeley Hazel. And Sarah Palin. And... and... never mind.)

But no one drives up traffic like Megan Fox-- or, more importantly-- Megan Fox in a bikini...

According to One India:

American actress Megan Fox has been listed as the hottest babe on the planet in Chickipedia's latest 100 hottest women list yet again. Chickipedia, which is the world's largest web-based, wiki-based database of hot women on the planet, released the Top 100 most-searched for women in the month of October, the Daily Telegraph reported.

This is the second year that Fox has topped the list, with the second place going to Hugh Hefner''s No 1 ex-girlfriend Holly Madison. The most-searched for female survey saw Keeley Hazell in third position, while new Aussie girls ‘The Veronicas’ were at number six. The new list also saw Madonna and Victoria Beckham being dropped and replaced by US Republican IT girl Sarah Palin and her alter ego, Tina Fey.

Good riddance to Madonna and Victoria-- but Holly Madison? Bland as New York is fucking freezing today.

In celebration of Fox's latest victory, GQ has unleashed more of the photos that made her a huge star and, for no reason whatsoever, we're passing them along to you:

Tips From A Stripper: On Saving The Environment

Who is GQ's Man of the Year? (File Under: Duh)

The 50 Sexiest Movies of All-Time: 50-41

Yes, We'd Like A Lifetime Supply of Pronto Condoms, Please

Top 5 Sex Scenes From TV Shows

Happiness by the Numbers: Sex and TV

Sloppy Seconds: The Republicans Finally Find a Song

Emily Farris — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 21:21:00 GMT

Holly Madison talks about her break-up with Playboy papa Hugh Hefner. [FadedYouth]

When will Tina Fey be back on Saturday Night Live? The suspense is killing us! [Yahoo!]

Mark Wahlberg is getting married to his girlfriend and baby mama, Rhea Durham. What a funky bunch! [People]

Are Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer back together? Probably. Do we care anymore? Not really. [Us]

We have a sneaking suspicion that Hank Williams, Sr. wouldn't be too happy about Hank Williams, Jr. finally giving the Republicans their damn song. Especially because it's the worst version ever of an already sort-of bad song.

Related:

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Who Would You Rather: Joe "Boobies" Francis vs. Hugh Hefner?

If Only Tina Fey Would Play Sarah Palin in the Forthcoming Porno

Sloppy Seconds: More Fun With Sarah Palin Affair Rumors

Sloppy Seconds: John Cusack's Stalker is Neither Off the Hook or Unattractive

Emily Farris — Thu, 09 Oct 2008 21:33:00 GMT

Are you surprised that there's an official Sarah Palin sex doll on the market? [The Frisky]

Guns 'n Roses Chinese Democracy, the follow-up to the band's 1991 Use Your Illusion, is really, finally coming out November 23. For real. Finally. [MTV]

Anna Wintour is in looooove! [Radar]

Poor Hugh Hefner. He's "in the dumps" after one of his lady friends left him. Perhaps one of the other two can console him? [People]

Because what TV executive hasn't been a gay porn star? [Defamer]

We can't really blame a girl for stalking John Cusack; who hasn't imagined him standing outside her window, wearing a terribly charming trench coat and holding a boom box over his head? So forgive us if we have a little pity on Emily Leatherman, the woman accused of stalking Cusack. Wednesday, judge rejected a plea bargain that would have allowed Leatherman to avoid state prison. If she ends up there, we'll send her casseroles. Totally without nail files baked into them! [Yahoo!]

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