Scanner : child abuse

Today in WTF: Crying Japanese Sumo Baby Contest

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 08 May 2009 21:32:00 GMT

We'd heard about this from friends of ours that had lived in Japan, but we couldn't imagine it was an annual event... or that it took place in multiple cities, with throngs of onlookers actually enjoying babies crying at deafening volumes.

Thankfully, LiveLeak has video to go with our story...

The festival translates as "Baby Cry-sumo" and participants are sat facing each other on tiny wrestling mats, then given some a reason to cry about it. The baby that cries the loudest is declared the winner and is considered blessed with health and happiness. Or something.

What weirded us out the most is all the laughing, smiling locals and tourists standing around the screamfest. How the hell can they stand all that? When we're in a restaurant with these monsters, we ask to move to another table, preferably by the kitchen, where the chef's screaming usually drowns out all others and bring us the health and happiness we were seeking.

Is this child abuse or the next Fox reality show, starring fat white Americans? Unfortunately, we'd guess both.

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A New Book About Sex, Geared For Toddlers And Up

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 04 May 2009 17:08:00 GMT

Last year, a 1992 book about sex for kids, written by Narelle Wickham, was re-released with little notice.

That's all changed now that Focus on the Family has found out it contains positive messages about same sex marriage, artificial insemination, and a whole host of other "adult" issues. Oh, and it's being marketed for toddlers...

One ad for the book describes it this way:

It includes simple age appropriate descriptions of sexual intercourse, donor insemination, In Vitro Fertilisation and Gamete Intra Fallopian Transfer, as well as pregnancy, birth, adoption, surrogacy, and same-sex parented families. A pioneering book when first published to wide acclaim in 1992, this new edition is now printed in full colour and includes updated content.

That's not how Focus on the Family, America's greatest source of disturbing press releases, sees it:

The controversial publication, Where Did I Really Come From?, also features a drawing of two gay men holding a baby, in a chapter about surrogacy.

The publisher's marketing spruiks the book, which includes in-depth descriptions of sexual intercourse, as suitable to be read to two-year-old children.

"It devalues the traditional family unit and at the very least desensitises us," Focus On The Family spokeswoman Deb Sorensen said.

In a chapter on assisted conception, the book tells children: "Sometimes, a woman really wants to have a baby but she doesn't want to have intercourse with a man. Some women want to bring up a baby by themselves, or with another woman, so the baby gets two mums.

"A woman may go to a doctor who will arrange to get some sperm for her, or a special man she knows may agree to give her some of his sperm."

The book was... relaunched by Learn to Include [publisher of books with positive gay characters and messages.]

Learn to Include's website says the book's "simple, non-judgmental explanations of sexual intercourse, assisted conception, pregnancy, birth, adoption and surrogacy are "suitable for 2-12 year olds". [News.com.au]

The best part of this entire book are these lines:

A woman and a man hug and caress each other, and the woman accepts the man's penis into her vagina. After a while lots of sperm come out of his penis and into her vagina.

Of course, the book does not get into what happens when the man cannot make sperm come out of his penis. Because that would be too much for a two-year-old's brain to process.

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This Teenage Sex Tape Craze Is Getting Out of Hand...

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 16:28:00 GMT

And you thought it had gone too far when those two kids were arrested for making a sex tape of a consenting couple...

According to the Associated Press in Florida:

The Monroe County Sheriff's office has charged 10 teens from the Florida Keys with making child pornography after detectives confiscated a videotape of a 16-year-old runaway girl having sex with a 19-year-old man.
Authorities said the investigation started when a 14-year-old runaway told a school resource officer that she was worried her friend -- the girl having sex on the tape -- had been raped. The girl who appeared in the video denied being raped.
The teens, seven boys and three girls age 13 to 19, face charges of sexual performance by a child, a second-degree felony. Eight of the 10 were arrested Wednesday; the other two are out of town and will be arrested when they return.

Okay, one to operate the camera... another to hold the boom... my, this is a serious production now. So, we gotta ask, what were the other half-dozen participants doing during all this? Your suspicions, in the comments...

Via AP/ABC News.

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Mother-Daughter Clones To Sign Porn Contract Any Day Now...

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 17 Apr 2009 15:25:00 GMT

The first thing you'll notice about this article is that there is no mention of a husband/father figure in the lives of these two women.

The women in question are Janet and Jane Cunliffe, a mother and daughter pair that look almost nothing alike, even after mom spent 10,000 English pounds on plastic surgery to, as she requested, look more like her child. Why would anyone do that?

The questions that remain with us after viewing this disturbing photo:

1) Isn't it obvious to everyone around them that Mom is desperately trying to be like her daughter (and failing?)

2) What kind of person puts their daughter through this photo shoot for a major publication like the Daily Mail?

3) Which one's the daughter?

'It might sound barmy that I had cosmetic surgery to look like my daughter, but she's gorgeous. Who wouldn't want to look like her?

'The way I see it is that she got her looks from me in the first place - mine have just faded with age.

'Seeing how attractive Jane is made me want to get my looks back. Now instead of mum and daughter we look more like twins. I had good genes and good skin, but I needed a helping hand to make me feel better about myself.'

Certainly Janet wasn't always such a head-turner. Just a few years ago, she was a size 14 redhead and felt, she says, dowdy and unattractive.

Not, she insists, that she was ever vain. [Oh, definitely not now, that's for sure. - Ed.] 'I didn't have time for vanity in my 20s as I was too busy bringing up Jane and her brother, Pete,' she says.

Commenters on various blogs had their own concerns:

I imagine the husband is royally creeped out.

I imagine he is no longer the husband.

-I wonder what it would have cost her to look like someone attractive.

-daughter responds by spending twice that much on psychiatric sessions

-How is this news? These women are EVERYWHERE in Texas.

Via the Daily Mail.

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Teenage Girl Sues Her Father For Grounding Her, Wins

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 13:52:00 GMT

A 12-year-old girl (now apparently 13) sued her father in 2008 for denying her permission to attend a class trip because she was grounded. According to the father, the child had been using the internet at his house after being instructed not to. He claims the girl was visiting sites he had previously blocked and possibly sharing pornographic images of herself.

This is a no-brainer, right? But this textbook example of a frivolous lawsuit not only wasn't thrown out, it's gone through one initial trial and an appeal, both of which resulted in the girl coming out ahead. How is this even possible?

Of course, there is a lot more to this story. Even the original CBC reporter who wrote extensively about the case neglected to mention the bitter (and I mean BITTER) divorce proceedings. The mother, it is alleged, heard about the grounding and decided she would pay for the trip herself, chaperone, and help the girl sue her father with the help of her mother's attorney. (Of course, you could look at it another way-- perhaps the mother was into the trip before the grounding, so the father found and excuse to mess with them.) Either way, this child is being manipulated by one or both awful parents-- and, even worse, the idiot judge let all proceed as if there were a real case here. Instead, he should have fined both parents $100,000 and taken the kid away from them. Okay, that's a little harsh, we admit-- $100,000 US is like $8 billion Canadian.

Seriously, though, check out what judicial jackass (i.e. the winning attorney) had to say about this:

"Going to court was a last resort," said Lucie Fortin, a legal aid attorney who represented the girl. "The question was that there was a problem between the father and the mother, and the child asked the court to intervene because it was important to her.

"The trip was very important to her."

The last resort? The last resort for us would've been for a compromise and the girl to lose internet at his house for six months but still go on the trip. Maybe. "The trip was very important to her?" Then maybe she shouldn't have used the internet after being instructed not to. For all the punishments we endured as kids, almost every one of them was because we broke a rule we knew better than to break. Tough. Shit. Girl.

The father and mother are no longer speaking, by the way. And so we move on into the 21st century, having learned so little...

Via CBC.

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So You Think You Can Dance Better Than A Third Grader?

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 06 Apr 2009 13:20:00 GMT

This is exactly what we needed to kick off the week: a seriously badass brother and sister improvisational dance team.

Hopefully, these kids will grow up, find this on YouTube, and realize maybe it's actually pretty cool that their parents captured this moment in time. One commenter muses: "As Jack Donaghy says, In five years we'll all either be working for him or be dead by his hand." We'll tweak that a bit: he's either the next Black Michael Jackson or a future Melendez brother.

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12-Year-Old Girl Forced To Do Something Horrible At Teacher's Behest

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 10 Feb 2009 19:28:00 GMT

And no, it's not have his baby...

A teacher named Steve Davis at-- here's a name for ya-- Seven Hills Middle School in Nevada City, California has brought his entire school district shame, not to mention a major lawsuit, after what he forced a twelve-year-old girl to do at his request.

Davis has not publicly explained why he forced the unnamed girl to take a pregnancy test that involved giving a urine sample. The school, for that matter, hasn't explained why any nurse in their right mind gave Davis the pregnancy test to give to his adolescent student. And, of course, no one is talking about the case at all, since it's bound to cost the district millions.

Here's the saddest part of all: based on what we've read in various news outlets in California, it seems that Davis heard "rumors" of the girl's pregnancy from a girl who has a history of spreading unsubstantiated rumors about the victim and still he did not dismiss them. Of course, this all begs the obvious question:

Why was Steve Davis forcing anyone, let alone a 12-year-old student, to take a pregnancy test for any reason?

Here's one of the many news stories about the case.

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Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 14:44:00 GMT

If you were to read only that headline, you would be forgiven for mistaking this tale for one of those "heartwarming" Good Morning America segments about the teens that turn their jewelery hobbies into multimillion-dollar online businesses.

Unfortunately, that's decidedly not the case with this creepy story...

According to a local AP report out of the Milwaukee, Wisconsin area, an eighteen-year-old boy named Anthony Stanci is in cuffs today, charged with "five counts of child enticement, two counts of second-degree sexual assault of a child, two counts of third-degree sexual assault, possession of child pornography, repeated sexual assault of the same child, and making a bomb threat."

And what did he do, except for that last charge, to warrant such a rap? He started a Facebook account and pretended to be a hot teenage girl, then got more than 30 (that is, 30 known) male victims to send him nude photos of themselves. When they did so, he stayed in character and threatened to take the pics to the proper adults-- and/or forward them widely over the internet-- if they did not comply with "her" demands to see the boys have sex with another boy-- Anthony Stanci, as it turns out.

Several of the boys actually went through with it. This went on for several months, until Stanci took things too far-- he concluded this sick sexual game wasn't enough to get back at his high school, so he called in a bomb threat that shut down classes. That's when the cops decided to snoop into sicko boy's background.

The maximum penalty if convicted on all charges is nearly 300 years in prison. [AP]

Stanci is facing a very rough life in prison, regardless of the length of his sentence-- an eighteen-year-old homosexual convicted of raping boys is about the worst imaginable setup for an inmate...

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This Kid Is Sooo Wasted...

Brian Fairbanks — Tue, 03 Feb 2009 16:02:00 GMT

The only time we've ever driven under the influence is after a visit to the dentist. We can't remember why we needed so much "laughing gas" and novocaine (or whatever it was they gave me before, one assumes, jumping my bones and filming it, a la that Seinfeld episode), but in any case, we remember turning on the car and "Mrs. Robinson" coming over the radio. For some reason, this was all of a sudden the funniest song ever recorded, and we began to sing along in a deliberate monotone that made the song sound like William Shatner with a brutal hangover. Then we started up the car and drove home, not remembering how to get there.

This 7-year-old boy got to have that experience, thankfully years before being allowed to drive. Luckily, his father, who apparently has no shame (or fear of being accused of exploiting children for YouTube glory), had promised to record the boy's tooth removal procedure in a kind of "before and after." Don't ask us why he thought the kid wanted this-- it doesn't really make much sense. Anyway, the poor kid is absolutely out of his mind-- veering from lucid blubbering to high-pitched screaming and back again in just under ten seconds.

Also, he is wearing a Florida Gators football t-shirt. That really says it all for us: this took place in Florida, the nation's craziest state.

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Woman With the Best Perv Name Ever to Be Sentenced For, Well, Being a Perv

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 29 Jan 2009 17:03:00 GMT

Maryland just received a much-needed injection of seediness after a small-town English teacher pleaded guilty yesterday to a sex crime involving one of her students.

The media is having a field day with this one, with television reporters gleefully repeating her porn star name over and over to soak up a bit more of that ratings glory...

According to the Baltimore Sun, Autumn Lee Leathers (yum) faces a one-year prison sentence after taking a plea deal from prosecutors, who tossed out charges of assault and child abuse. The crime she is now guilty of? Having a torrid, three-month sex fest with a 15-year-old boy, which became so loud and publicly obnoxious that her neighbors finally had to rat her out:

Officers say they were contacted by a resident, who noticed the student at Leathers’ home several times n the late evening.

When he was interviewed by officers, the student told them he and Leathers had a sexual relationship that started in May of this year and continued throughout the summer.

Authorities believe all of the sexual activity occurred at Leathers’ home, not in the school. A search warrant was executed at Leathers’ home on Braddock Street in Frostburg Wednesday evening, where police found other evidence that has become part of the investigation. [Naughty Neighbors]

Leathers was 24 at the time of her crimes-- and was admittedly kind of a cutie then-- so, she becomes part of our ongoing thesis about attractive 22- to 29-year-old teachers in America finding that, for the first time in their lives, there are "men" that are off-limits to them and how great it makes them feel to break the rules...

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Sloppy Seconds: Charlie Sheen Denies Enjoying Endless Lapdances

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 22:06:00 GMT

Barack Obama is up to 364 electoral votes after winning North Carolina. Meanwhile, Oregon has a new Democratic Senator.

Anti-Prop 8 people rioted in the streets of California, which is today the most bigoted, shameful state in the union. Fall Out Boy's Patrick Stump: "It's a real shame people are mixing up their church and state."

Joe Jonas didn't deserve her awesomeness anyway...

Ellen DeGeneres
says on her talk show (airing Nov. 11), “He broke up with you on the phone? That’s not right.”

Taylor responds; “It’s all right - I’m cool. You know what, it’s like, when I find that person that is right for me, he’ll be wonderful When I look at that person, I’m not even going to remember the boy who broke up with me over the phone in 27 seconds when I was 18.”

Ellen was shocked by Taylor’s honesty, saying, “No, you did not. Aw, snap!” [Just Jared]

We can't say we disagree with London's decision to ban smokers from adopting children, although we wish people would spend more time trying to actually get orphans adopted.

We're still trying to figure out why this creep falls so quickly after trying to attack a girl in an elevator, but we're happy watching it over and over again just to see the ass kicking he deservedly receives.

Charlie Sheen denies a report that he was enjoying lapdances recently, perhaps because he has pregnant wife at home.

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Today in the Apocalypse: Makeover Parties For Little Girls

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 15:07:00 GMT

Did you know more than thirty percent of ten-year-old girls worry about their body image? Did you just barf in your mouth a little?

Good, because now you're really in for it: makeover parties... for eight-year-olds...

A furious mother who, of course, prefaces her remarks in the Daily Mail by saying that she's not "prudish" (compared to what?), has something to say to these parents who want to make single-digit daughters into double-digit whores:

A few days ago, my eight-year-old daughter Bo came home from school with a bemused expression on her face. One of her friends was hosting a makeover party.
Bo instinctively knew that she would never have been allowed to attend. I was utterly appalled. Frankly, I would rather cut my left arm off than let my girls wear make-up.
I was horrified to discover that some mothers believe it's acceptable to invite little girls of seven and eight to a party for the sole purpose of having their hair and make-up done.

In the States, I know they offer body waxing for girls as young as seven.
With major supermarkets selling 'sexy' thongs for five-year-old girls or tops with provocative writing, our children are becoming objectified and sexualised well before their time. It's a paedophile's dream.

We knew about high heels for babies, but not about thongs for five-year-olds or (ewwwwwww) bikini waxes for kids. Is it time to make these things illegal-- obviously not the makeup party, which is just plain poor parenting and nothing more-- or what?

Via the Daily Mail.

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12-Year-Old Boy Gets Arrested For Attacking Pregnant Teacher, Threatening To Kill Her

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 15:52:00 GMT

What's nuttier than a story about an adolescent getting arrested for throwing sticks and stones (literally) at his pregnant teacher?

How about what he said to her while he did it and the fact that the local media saw fit to print his mugshot as a warning to others...

According to the TV station that revealed the poor kid's identity:

The boy stands just four feet tall and weighs just 54 pounds, but apparently the little 12-year-old has a big temper. He was arrested for viciously attacking his pregnant school counselor and is now facing two felony charges, battery on a pregnant female and battery on a school official.
The 12-year-old started running away from his teachers and was about to jump the fence when the counselors tried to stop him and that's when he got mad."Next time, it's not going to be a pleasant visit! You go to school to learn!" a Palm Bay officer told Jason Lord as he got into a squad car.

We won't even take bets on whether this kid has a rough home life (there's no way they can just write this off to ADD or bipolar disorder or whatever they can come up with), since it's 99% likely he's been through more than the usual rigamarole there. You don't learn to say "Bitch, I'm going to kill you" while giving two teachers the middle finger from your classmates, you know...

We won't cause him further humiliation by posting his mugshot here... the kid's crying in it, for God's sake. Don't they have any respect?

Via WFTV.

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Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 14:12:00 GMT

Three guesses as to what Republican Chris Ortloff, a former member of the New York State Assembly, is facing life in prison for...

1) Ortloff served twenty years in the State Legislature before he was appointed to the parole board by Gov. George Pataki, a position he retains to this day.

2) Ortloff discovered the cursed internet, invented by his nemesis Al Gore, and decided he liked it. Well, he liked the part about being able to e-mail (what he thought were) 11 and 12-year-old sisters in hopes of arranging hotel sex.

3) The perv went to a hotel with "condoms, lubricants, a vibrator, and a camera" to capture the illicit sex with the underage girls. Of course, the underage girls were actually cops who were legally allowed to kick his door down and haul his ass downtown, which is exactly what they did.

4) Now Ortloff faces ten years to life in the slammer for his attempted night of sin. He's due back in court today for a bail hearing. Good luck with that-- see you at your first parole board hearing, dumbass!

Via Newsday.

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Paris Night Club Says You Can Never Start 'Em Too Young

Ina Maier — Fri, 10 Oct 2008 19:15:00 GMT

A new nightclub has just opened in Paris and if you think you're getting in, think again. They've got a very strict entrance policy...

The New York Times' describes a recent Saturday scene:

There was a crowd seven deep on Saturday outside one of the hottest clubs in Paris. Young people were pleading to get in, but the woman with the clipboard behind the velvet rope would not budge. There was some crying.

“Too old,” the clipboard woman said in French to a photographer, who was snapping pictures every time the door opened to reveal a peek of a padded red room with glittering lights and the promise of V.I.P.’s inside. One apparently overstimulated patron was passed out on steps outside.

At BabyDisco, they don't mess around. All patrons must be between the ages of 3 and 7. (Seriously. They're checking ID's.) Anywhoo, before your imagination runs away with images of boozing babies and inebriated infants, we should clarify. It's some sort of whack-a-doodle, yuppie art installation in Paris' Palais de Tokyo museum. The inspiration? To "introduce children to the creative aspects of dance, music and video."

Oh, and it's sponsored by Little Marc Jacobs. But, of course!

via The New York Times

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Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 03 Oct 2008 20:03:00 GMT

This is one of the most bizarre family custody cases we've ever heard about.

It involves a man, a hooker, a mom, a five-year-old girl, a series of judges, one STD... and, hopefully, a happy ending... no pun intended...

According to Strollerderby, this is the story of:

1) Man in Australia gets married, his wife has a five-year-old daughter. Daughter contracts an unnamed STD.

2) Wife leaves man, saying he cheated on her and gave the daughter the STD. But how did he give the daughter the STD?

3) Man tells judge: "Hey Judge, it was nothing more than this ol' pro I rented out on vacation in Bali." Judge says: "Suck it, I'm taking your daughter away." (Actual transcripts unavailable.)

4) Man tells appellate court judge, "Dude, I was serious about that ol' pro thing. I think I gave the undisclosed STD to my daughter via a towel we shared one day." Judge: "Yep, that sounds about right" and gives the man custody again.

5) The internets throw a shitfit:

That a judge would put a child back in the home of a suspected molester without being 100 percent certain is creepy enough. But so is the fact that a number of STDs could easily be passed to a child - even, according to reputable health sources, by a shared towel.

Innocent until proven guilty, people. Of course, the guy deserves at least some punishment for cheating with a hooker in a foreign country while he had a wife and family back home-- when are people going to realize that cheating has major consequences for those around them?

Via Strollerderby.

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Mom Gets Five Years In Prison For Going Down On Her Daughter's Friend

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 17:21:00 GMT

A woman in Ohio has been sentenced to five years in jail for having oral sex with her daughter's underage female friend.

Oh, but it gets so, so much better...

Becky Jo Tatum, 42, was arrested recently for going down on the girl at a wild, drug-fueled party for her teenage daughter at their home in Bexley. When police raided the party, they found a shotgun, cocaine, and an underage female who had been Tatum's sex partner. (The age of consent in Ohio, by the way, is 16.)

Tatum was booked for posession of cocaine, sex with a minor, and on weapons charges. Tatum is not allowed to own or carry guns because she had prior drug and prostitution convictions on her record. Wow. These must've been some parties...

So, we're guessing, that might be why she ends up with a whopping five years behind bars-- it ain't just the oral sex that brought down her empire...

Via WTVN.

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Nicole Pasulka — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 16:12:00 GMT

Gaaaaaaaaah! We will never look at a playground in the same way again.

Sloppy Seconds: What Happened To Harvey Dent?

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 21:18:00 GMT

No wonder it was so easy to change votes: we had no idea Ohio allowed random people to babysit voting machines at their own homes prior to the election. Anyone who thinks Ohio voted fair and square can at least admit that was a pretty stupid idea, right?

Speaking of Ohio and politics, Stephanie Tubbs-Jones was pronounced dead, then that was retracted, following a brain aneurysm. Tubbs-Jones, a black Congresswoman and hardcore Hillary supporter, is currently in critical condition.

Britney's condition has improved, so much so that people actually want to read about her latest diet...

"I have no sugar. I don't eat fruit or even fruit juice because of the sugar. I eat chicken and salmon and rice. I eat avocados. I'll have egg whites for breakfast and sometimes turkey burgers for lunch.

"I try to do just 1,200 calories a day. It may sound like it's not much, but it's actually a lot of food if you eat the right things.'"

The famous two-headed turtle was turtle-napped last night. How much ya wanna bet it won't be two days before the idiot who stole it will brag to one too many of his friends...

Another bet: How long before they make a movie of the woman who spent her 37th birthday robbing gas stations with her teenage son?

Maybe she spanked her kid too much or something. After all, according to Strollerderby, spanking is just a gateway drug to hardcore beat-downs.

Meanwhile, Paul McCartney denies he has plans to marry a virtually unknown "American socialite."

And finally: Moviegoers have been arguing for weeks about the open-ended climax to the Dark Knight-- spoiler alert! Haven't seen The Dark Knight? Then skip the next paragraph and go straight to the Related section, please...

The script for the blockbuster sequel was made available for purchase on Tuesday and soon after found its way online. It's a long read at 167 pages, but fans looking for confirmation on the fate of Dent need only look at page 163.
"Dent lies at the bottom of the hole, his neck broken," the stage direction, written by brothers Jonathan and Christopher Nolan, reads. "DEAD." (Capital letters their emphasis, not ours.)

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Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 13:43:00 GMT

In a small area of North Texas, it is now legal for teachers to carry handguns on school property. Of course, students are still not allowed to defend themselves from caning, punching, or shooting that may come their way. Ah, justice...

Speaking of Texas, a man who allegedly got naked and groped a four-year-old boy was almost immediately arrested and tasered by police. Now that's justice...

Wouldn't it be awesome if this guy played Freddy in the Nightmare on Elm Street remake? We mean-- wouldn't it be awesome if they didn't make it at all... but if they have to, wouldn't Billy Bob Thornton be a twisted, bizarre, possibly brilliant choice?

Lauren Conrad's clothing line has been dropped by Kitson.

Jerry Lewis claims the gun he was busted with at the airport was a telethon gift.

Oprah will be there for Obama at the convention.

And Eva Longoria still keeps in touch with her old Wendy's.

Thanks, Susan!

How Young Is Too Young?

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 11 Aug 2008 19:21:00 GMT

No, not in that way...

An 11-year boy was arrested for armed robbery... at a Florida Walgreen's... Apparently, our boy took after our favorite Charlie Scene movie* and tried to rob a convenient store last night.

According to FoxnewsOrlando:

The incident started around 3:30am Monday when the youngster entered the Walgreen’s. Police said the boy was able to make it out of the store with a backpack with an undisclosed amount of cash.

“Officers were able to locate and arrest the child approximately five minutes after the robbery occurred.”

Unconfirmed reports has it that the boy led police on a high-speed chase through the playground on his bicycle, no word yet if he was able to have sex with a girl* while riding however.

Orlando Police said the boy did not steal any prescription drugs or medication; only cash.

The child has been charged with commercial robbery.

First of all, what is this kid doing out at 3am? In a sane society we’d also ask why he had access to BB guns, but this is Florida we’re talking about.

The good news is that, according to the police, the boy “did not steal any prescription drugs or medication; only cash.” For a second we were worried he might have an OxyContin addiction.

[Full disclosure: Before you load up your Netflix queue, The Chase is only my favorite Charlie Sheen movie because of a similar experience late one night on the way home from a country bar in Jersey (don’t ask). I was driving my girlfriend’s 1985 Dodge Charger down some dark highway when she decided to hike up her skirt, zip down my fly and climb on top of me. By the time we finished I looked down to notice that my foot had the pedal floored and we climaxed together at 110 mph. I have an affinity for Grease 2 for similar reasons. Otherwise both films are rather forgettable.]

VIDEO: Police: 11-year-old child robbed Walgreen's

-this post was written by substitute blogger Byron Dafoe

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Top 10 Teen Pop Stars

"This Is The City's Response To A Penis" One of Many Classic Moments From Nude Gallery Raid

16 Year Old Boy Figures Out How To Rip Off Sex Offenders, Get Rich

Scanner Controversy: Battle of the Nasty Words

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 17:55:00 GMT

Scanner was invaded this week by a lot of angry people... angry misogynist people, to be precise.

16 Year Old Boy Figures Out How To Rip Off Sex Offenders, Get Rich

Did NAMBLA invade Nerve? Regular readers debated this very question following the most-viewed post we've ever run.

Teenage Girl Gets 2 Month Sentence For False Rape Allegation

This post's comments got so out of hand we had to step in and ask if we should delete 'em all and start over. That only seemed to infuriate readers, who attacked the commenter who even so much as mused whether a misogynist invasion was taking place...

Want to Know Scanner Nicole's Gender? Ask Her Browser!

We're pretty sure this survey was bullshit, what do you say?

Female Teacher's Aide Guilty of Sex with 16-Year-Old Female Student

A friend of the subjects of this story took us to task. Apparently, we're not even allowed to "report" on the incident... although if you ask us, we don't think 16 is terribly wrong-- in many states and countries, it's in fact perfectly legal.

New Zealand Party Poopers Move To Shut Down "Boobs On Bikes" Parade

Did we ever figure out why those American flags were there?

And Gitty Grunwald has read but has yet to weigh in on our discussion here:

Crush of the Week: Gitty Grunwald, Fighting An Hasidic Cult For Her Daughter

Scanner Controversy is a new feature, posted every other Friday afternoon, running down a handful of our hottest, most widely-contested stories...

Sex Writer On "Obscene" Website Sentenced To Home Detention

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 08 Aug 2008 16:38:00 GMT

A woman whose website, Red Rose Stories, was shuttered three years ago by the Feds, pleaded guilty yesterday to obscenity charges and received a long term of probation plus six months of home confinement.

Wait, fiftysomething years after Howl and Naked Lunch, they're still busting people for "obscenity," particularly on the internet? We had to find out just what the site could have presented that could get its owner in so much trouble...

Karen Fletcher is the owner of Red Rose Stories. She's a 56-year-old Pennsylvania woman who happens to live in the district covered by crusading US attorney Mary Beth Buchanan, a staple of the Alberto Gonzales/George W. Bush Justice Department and her website contained

stories that allegedly involved bestiality, water sports, scat, bondage and domination, S&M, slavery, threesomes, orgies and sex with children.

Note that not one of Fletcher's pages featured photos of any kind, nor did the site explicitly encourage real-life encounters with children. After her arrest, Fletcher quipped that, to her, it seemed "the only legal sex stories are those that involve a man and a woman consenting to missionary position sex in a dark room.”

Buchanan "has gone on a rampage trying to stamp out expression that doesn't meet her standards of morality," Marc John Randazza, a law professor at the Barry University School of Law in Orlando, wrote on his blog.
Randazza, who teaches about free speech rights and other legal issues, acknowledges that the content of Red Rose Stories was shocking, but he suggested the U.S. Constitution protects fictional stories. "If you believe in the Constitution, and you believe in what this country means, you can NOT believe that any American should ever face prison for writing fiction -- no matter what the subject matter of that fiction might be," he wrote in a blog post.

What do you think? Was Fletcher a fool for writing about child sex and enjoying it?

Via Anarchist Librarians and PC World.

Today in WTF: 10 Year Arrested For Defending Self... With Pea Shooter

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 28 Jul 2008 14:29:00 GMT

The NYPD didn't kill anyone this time, but they did harm a ten-year-old boy and are about to be sued for millions in taypayer dollars.

Anor Frank, a schoolkid from Staten Island, had been terrorized on the school bus by older, bigger kids, including a girl who stomped his chest. Rather than shoot, stab, or take some other nasty revenge, he decided to get them back in what he thought would be a mild manner...

On Wednesday, Anor was minding his own business on the bus when one his regular bullies began to bug him.

"I said, 'OK, leave me alone,' and he was still bothering me like pushing me around, and I just shot him. I didn't mean to shoot him. I was trying to get him to leave me alone," Annor said. [CBS]

But Anor didn't fire a handgun at the boy. He had rigged his homemade pea shooter to fire harmless objects, and he pulled the toy out and fired it at the bully. Of the many news outlets that have covered this story so far, not one of them has mentioned that the bully received medical treatment or was in any way harmed by the shot. Nonetheless, the "victim's" family agreed that Anor should be arrested.

Meanwhile, the ten-year-old was handcuffed and arrested, taken to the station, and connected to a chair. When Uncle Emmanuel arrived, he found the boy crying from the pain and a disinterested officer filling out paperwork. After being charged with assault and reckless endangerment, Anor was taken to the emergency room because of the brutal handcuffing and now the family will likely sue the city of New York for millions.

Here's the full video which may give you a better idea as to the inanity of Anor's arrest:

Via CBS and other sources.

Related:

Woolworth's Kinda Regrets Naming Kid's Bed "Lolita"

Score! Photographer Pulls Off Public Nude Shoot Despite Police Invasion...

Police Shoot "Drug Dealer" 5 Times, Find No Drugs

Child Molestation Scandal Calls Validity Of Entire Miss South Carolina Pageant Into Question

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 17:10:00 GMT

Joseph Pettigrew Sanders IV, the Executive Director of the Miss South Carolina pageant, which concluded earlier this month, has been arrested for, big shocker, sexually assaulting a nine-year-old girl.

A woman named Anita Jordan Gearhart was also arrested, although we're not entirely sure what her connection is. (The charge is "engaging in unlawful conduct with a child," which may mean she assisted in the molestation in some way, possibly by escorting the girl to her doom.) Perhaps the story's most devastating detail, the one that will likely send cries of outrage among parents and lawyers to begin filling out paperwork immediately

Sanders has been director of the Miss South Carolina Pageant for a number of years. Interestingly, he was under a federal investigation in 2006 for allegedly engaging in inappropriate sexual activity with a pageant contestant.

No charges proceeded from that investigation.

Sanders’ name was removed from the Miss South Carolina website this afternoon.

Via CBS 7 and The Liberty Sphere.

Crush of the Week: Gitty Grunwald, Fighting An Hasidic Cult For Her Daughter

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 16 Jul 2008 20:22:00 GMT

Forget the New Yorker cover. This week's most memorable magazine front page is actually New York's: "What's A Nice Girl Like This Doing Fighting the Hasids for Her Baby?"

This story is so involving, and the damsel at its center so captivating, you'll be calling your legislator by the time your halfway done...

Here's a brief rundown (sorry if we fudge a few details-- it's a long story and we're exhausted just from reading it):

Gitty Grunwald grew up under the Satmar Hasidim in the town of Kiryas Joel, or KJ, in New York's Catskills. At the age of 17, she was forced to marry a total stranger, who gave her daughter Esther Miriam, now 4.

Once, when Esther Miriam was a baby, Gitty took her for a walk. "A guy looked into the carriage," Gitty recalls. "He said how cute Esther Miriam was and went on his way. It was nice. But then these minivans came tearing down the street. Hasid jump out and surround me, screaming, 'Who was that guy? What did he want?'
It was the Vaad Hatznius, KJ's moral police, who Gitty refers to as "those stupid Talibans."

It only gets worse from there, but we'll spare you the continued horror. Or most of it.

In KJ, women are considered "impure" while on their periods, and isolated from their husbands. After the menstruation period appears to end, women are then forced "to wear white underwear for seven days, checking constantly to see if there's any discharge. Should spotting occur," a woman is forced to present her underwear to a rabbi who examines the stain, then decides whether to send the woman to a ritual bath before reuniting her with her husband.

Refusing to bend to these sorts of rules made her husband turn on her. He even yelled at her for the perceived sexuality in a hug she shared with her grandfather. Soon after, Yoely, the husband, made a critical mistake: he let her use the internet.

"Once I read blogs from people who had gotten out of places like KJ, there was no turning back..."

In 2007, Gitty fled KJ, having realized she "didn't want to be one of those women who pop out babies every eighteen months and think whatever their husbands tell them to." She lived in Brooklyn with her daughter, spending time with her grandparents (who want no part of the "cult") in Manhattan. Then, one day

as Esther Miriam was walking with her class to a Flatbush playground, she was taken... Esther Miriam said they were wearing masks.

Readers will surely agree with Gitty's assumption that her husband was behind the kidnapping. The craziest part is, now Gitty has to fight for custody in both secular and rabbinical courts, while thanking her lucky stars for a precious few hours in her daughter's presence every so often. While her possibly doomed case moves through the courts (the Hasidic community has power lawyers, a positive drug test from Gitty, and a potential remarriage for her now-ex-husband to throw at our girl), Gitty is learning who Che Guevara, Keith Richards, and Billie Holiday are:

"Wow, Billie Holiday is a woman?"

Then Gitty’s cell phone rang. It was Esther Miriam. The call was court-ordered, ruled by the Orange County judge after hearing that Yoely’s family refused to pick up when Gitty called to talk to her daughter.

“Mommy,” came the high-pitched voice, audible even with the J train rumbling on overhead. “Esther Miriam!” Gitty replied. When Esther Miriam asked when she would see her mother again, Gitty brushed a stray tear from her eye and said, “Soon … very soon.”

The nine-page story is here, via New York Magazine.

Magazine Fights Censorship With Nude Six-Year-Old Cover Girl

Brian Fairbanks — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 13:01:00 GMT

An Art Monthly Australia cover that starred a nude six-year-old girl, an attempt to protest child pornography laws that some consider "artist censorship," has been deemed criminal and sent to the Australian Classification board... of censors.

Art Monthly Australia published the photo in response to government raids and the seizures of the photographs of artist Bill Henson, who frequently presents "tasteful" nudes of underage children. The magazine, which receives $50,000 in taxpayer funds every year, is now facing possible collapse after the typical righteous political outcry.

[The issue] also includes several provocative photos of children posing naked in adult jewellery as well as naked teenage girls.

Opposition Leader Barry O'Farrell labelled the publication a "provocative publicity stunt" and called for a review of Arts Council's funding for the magazine.

In the editorial, Maurice O'Riordan said he chose the 2003 picture of the young girl in the "hope of restoring some dignity to the debate" and to "validate nudity and childhood as subjects for art".

The image, taken by Melbourne-based Polixeni Papapetrou, is believed to be her own daughter. [Daily Telegraph]

While we hope that Australians will see right through this political posturing at the expense of creative freedom, we know better than to expect intelligent reactions to any publication that dares to defy community standards.

For more, check out the original story at The Daily Telegraph.

Scanner Roundtable: Supreme Court Rules Against Executions For Child Rape

Brian Fairbanks — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 14:35:00 GMT

Yesterday, the Supreme Court of the United States ruled, by a 5-4 margin (as usual), that the death penalty cannot be used on rapists who do not commit murder.

This immediately affects a case in Louisiana, but Texas was prepared for this possibility.

The decision does not entirely overturn Jessica's Law in Texas, the statute named after Jessica Lunsford, a Florida girl who was abducted and killed in 2005. The ruling invalidates the Texas death provision, but legislators created a fallback position in the statute: Life without parole would apply if capital punishment for child rape was outlawed.

We're against the death penalty in every form, mainly because the idea of someone rotting in prison, closed up in a cubicle the size of our closet for decades on end seems way more fitting for a murderer than a few years in prison and then a quick, possibly painful death. And we read Dead Man Walking when we were about 13, so that could have something to do with it.

What do you think? Did the Supreme Court make the right call or are they whimps? Should the death penalty be legal at all?

Via the Dallas Morning News.

Foster Father Of Sex Act Kids Arrested For His Own Sex Acts

Brian Fairbanks — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 18:31:00 GMT

John Cantrell, foster father and Santa Claus (obviously) to a whopping 27 adopted children, including some who performed in the infamous child sex show before he rescued them, has been arrested on unrelated charges of sexual assault from two decades-old cases.

Now one of the six trials of suspects in the Mineola, TX child sex ring case is on shaky ground... since Cantrell was supposed to be the prosecution's star witness...

Cantrell, who has cared for hundreds of children through the foster care system and has adopted 27, is being charged by two of his own daughters, who no longer live with the family. The statute of limitations has expired on one of the allegations, but the other is waiting a preliminary hearing to determine if there is enough evidence to proceed.

Cantrell's wife claims the two daughters are disturbed, possibly by earlier sexual abuse, and made "unfounded" claims in her younger years. But why doesn't the media say why John Cantrell is testifying? Does he happen to know the ringleaders for some non-child-sex reason and happened to stumble on their nefarious game... or did he attend the performances himself?

Victoria Cantell, another adopted daughter, also defended her dad. "They let me in with loving arms, and they always raised me in a godly, Christian way," she told KETK. "My dad's always been sweet and kind to everybody. All that stuff that they're saying, it can't be true."

Meanwhile, the next trial in the sex show case, Patrick Kelly's, is being postponed because of the new developments.

Via WorldNetDaily.

Previously: Sloppy Seconds... (in which we mention the case for the first time.)

Today in WTF: Boy Survives Being Caged, Skinned and Eaten By His Family

Emily Farris — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 14:15:00 GMT

Warning: if you have young children in the room — hey, they shouldn't be reading Scanner at all! Um, if you're a bad parent and have young children in the room, and they generally read Scanner, they shouldn't be reading this. But actually, if you have young children in the room who are reading this, we'll forgive you because you're not a bad parent compared to the mother in the Czech Republic who kept her young sons in a cage while family members skinned them and ate their raw flesh (and your kids should not have just read that).

Ms Mauerova, a member of the Grail Movement cult, caged [her son] Ondrej for months while relatives, also members of the cult, ate his raw flesh, a judge heard yesterday.

The court in Brno heard the family sexually abused the boys and made them cut themselves with knives.

The boys said they were kept in cages or handcuffed to tables and made to stand for days in their own urine.

The abuse was discovered when a man living nearby installed a TV monitor to keep watch on his newborn baby.

Instead of pictures of his newborn he was confronted by live images of Ondrej naked in the cellar — beaten and chained, The Sun
reported.

Sorry we made you read that. And we take back everything we ever said about anyone being a bad parent. Ever. This is by far one of the most terrible things we've ever heard of.

[News.au.com: Boy 'skinned, eaten by family']