Cat Ladies in Pop Culture

Colleen Kane — Fri, 01 May 2009 15:20:00 GMT

When movies and TV shows star women with cats, their pets lend an extra dimension of realism. Dear Hollywood: if you are going for accuracy, give your heroine a cat, not a stripping career. Every one of my girl friends (well...almost) is more likely to own a cat than to go wild on DVD. There are surely far more cat-owning women than hookers with hearts of gold...but roles for women in TV and film do not reflect that.

I wanted to compile a list of the best cat ladies, crazy or not, found in pop culture. But my difficulty finding examples proves true the complaint above. And another thing about the archetype of the cat lady. So she's single and she has cats: Why is she a tragic figure? We often joke on Scanner about cat ladies (as in the relatively together, non-hoarding type we know and love) and we've certainly used the term to describe ourselves, but we don't really have a problem with keeping a cat or three. So why aren't cat fanciers portrayed more positively?

Witness the following feline-fancying wrecks.

Catwoman (lonely, frustrated)

Michelle Pfeiffer's portrayal of Selina Kyle/Catwoman in 1992's Batman Returns was probably the most identifiable role I'd seen in a superhero movie up until then, in particular the scene where she as Selina comes home defeated from her unfulfilling job to an apartment of cats*, all "is that all there is?" malaise. Then later in the film when she kicked ass as Catwoman, it directly appealed to my Riot Grrrl sensiblities.

* Unfortunately, images of that homecoming-to-the-cats scene are about 100% less available online than images of Michelle Pfeiffer in the Catwoman suit.

Holly Golightly (hooker with heart of gold)

Audrey Hepburn said of the scene in Breakfast at Tiffanys when she had to throw Orangey the cat, who played Cat, into a rainy alley, it was "the most distateful thing she ever had to do on film." But hey, everything turned out OK in the end. So far, we're not doing so bad with this list...right?

Witches (witches)

Witches were unfairly reviled, feared, and persecuted throughout history. Are witches, often depicted with their feline familiars, the original crazy cat ladies? Are they part of the reason behind fear of single women who live with cats?

Crazy Cat Lady Eleanor (animal hoarder, alcoholic)

The character we know as Crazy Cat Lady from The Simpsons was once Eleanor, and FYI, she holds degrees from Harvard Medical and Yale Law. Click here for the story of how she became the CCL. There but for the grace of God go I.

Big Edie & Little Edie Beale (catshit crazy)

The stars of the cult Maysles documentary Grey Gardens and the HBO drama of the same name, Big Edie and Little Edie Beale were discovered living among dozens of cats as well as raccoons, and all the stench that entailed.

Here's what the current owner of Grey Gardens, Sally Quinn, had to say about the Beales' cats' continuing legacy.

According to Quinn, true to legend, when it rains the place still smells like cat pee from 30 years of being overrun with the Beales' cats (and no litter boxes!). "About ten years ago, we got up there the first of August and it had been raining for 10 days. We walked in the house and Ben, who can't smell anything cause he's got sinus problems, said, 'Oh my god.'" Quinn explained. "He's allergic to cats and his eyes started to water. He could smell the cat pee."

Well! That was a cheerful tour. In conclusion, it appears we need to reclaim the cat lady in pop culture.

Related:

Top 10 Ways to Avoid Becoming The Crazy Cat Lady

Stuff We Absolutely Need to Validate Ourselves: Crazy Cat Lady Action Figure

25-Year-Old Virgin Takes Us One Step Closer to Crazy Cat Lady Status

Tips From A Stripper

Brian Fairbanks — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 20:11:00 GMT

"Some of y'all want to learn how to date one of those sexy strippers you see on stage. That requires cocaine."

We love hearing from strippers out there, so if you have advice for those of who enjoying hitting the clubs, let us know! We're kidding-- we can't afford to go to strip clubs, even ones with the free admission and $10 Milwaukee's Best...

Nonetheless, check out this great bit of advice from a stripper...

Before I met my ex-husband, and before my first kid was born, I used to do a bit of stripping at one of Richmond's fine Southside gentlemen's clubs. So I think I'm more than qualified to teach you no account fools some of the finer points of properly conducting yourselves in a strip club environment.

The most important thing is tipping. Just because you paid a cover charge doesn't mean that you're "covered"! You guys need to tip each dancer for each dance! That's why they're coming around to every table after every performance. The standard tip is $0.50 per dance (a roll of pennies will do). An extra 15% should be added if the routine included ass clapping.

Ass clapping! That's our phrase of the day, people.

During my very first week on the job I accidentally farted right in a guy's face during a private dance! I figured it would be okay because I was wearing a spandex Catwoman suit...

Wait a minute... is she for real?

Yes, strippers are always available for sex in exchange for money! That's really how they make ends meet! And I can tell you right now that if you don't get to insert a finger during a private dance, you got ripped off!

All right, we're pretty sure she's kidding now, but this is entertaining material...

Via Jocelyn's Corner.

Related:

Scanner : catwoman

Cat Ladies in Pop Culture

Top 10 Ways to Avoid Becoming The Crazy Cat Lady

Stuff We Absolutely Need to Validate Ourselves: Crazy Cat Lady Action Figure

25-Year-Old Virgin Takes Us One Step Closer to Crazy Cat Lady Status

Tips From A Stripper

"Performer" Ecstasy Can Rap and Wear Lycra at the Same Time

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Sloppy Seconds: The Evangelical Sex Craze

Sex Shop Etiquette... From A $9-An-Hour Sex Shop Employee

House Hotties Break Network TV Rules With Raunchy Sex Scene