Scanner

Browse by Tags

• While You Were Sleeping: The Sexy Mrs. Freddy Kreuger

  We can picture it: a Cleopatra movie starring Catherine Zeta-Jones as the title character and Hugh Jackman as Marc Antony. But a musical? And directed by Steven Soderbergh? Former White House Press Secretary Scott McClelan endorsed Obama on D.L. Hughley's new show. John McCain really needs a high profile endorsement soon-- really, he needs just about anything and everything soon to turn this thing around. Some observers think McCain could be down to funds of only one million dollars a day... you don't even want to know how that compares to Obama's staggering total. Although we suspect it to be an exaggeration, this is nonetheless the most shocking HIV scare story we can recall... Read More... Posted Oct 24 2008, 10:16 AM by Brian Fairbanks with | with 4 comment(s) Filed under: high school, halloween, horror movies, cnn, missouri, fights, aids, john McCain, prison, hugh jackman, crack cocaine, boyfriends, Catherine Zeta-Jones, HIV, endorsements, scott mcclellan, anne hathaway, dance, st. louis, raffaello folleri, busted, halloween costumes, cleopatra

• Amy Winehouse's Year In Exile

  If you're like us, you think Amy Winehouse is an enormously talented, even potentially legendary singer-songwriter who is pissing it all away. Finally, Rolling Stone's exclusive interview with the drugged-out star reveals her secret inner life and explains just what is happening to "our Amy..." Among the story's highlights, an explanation of how this crack-smoking spiral got going... Read More... Posted Jun 27 2008, 03:02 PM by Brian Fairbanks with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: music, amy winehouse, london, drug addiction, blake fielder civil, crack cocaine, Rolling Stone

• Introducing The Mighty Boosh and Its Crack Fox

  We just discovered the BBC program The Mighty Boosh. We're still not quite sure what it is exactly besides hilarious. In the bit below Vince visits the Crack Fox at his home where "everything is different," we hear the story of the Crack Fox's descent into poverty and vice, and somehow there's also a racist badger. And, yes, it's as bizarre as it sounds.   Read More... Posted Jun 06 2008, 01:02 PM by Nicole Pasulka with | with 4 comment(s) Filed under: crack cocaine, BBC, mighty boosh, crack fox

• Sloppy Seconds: Get That Bill Cosby Sweater You've Always Wanted

  Jerry Hall's creepy 10-year-old son, Gabriel (her fourth with Mick Jagger and the one who once suckled her teet on a magazine cover) has threatened to kill himself if Mommy ever gets a boyfriend. [FameCrawler] Also, we just learned that Hall is "the Global Ambassador for Levitra, a treatment for erectile dysfunction, manufactured by Bayer Healthcare." [Wikipedia] Are Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz swapping exes? [Us] Read More... Posted Jun 03 2008, 06:51 PM by Emily Farris with | with no comments Filed under: kids, sloppy seconds, charity, cameron diaz, creepy, crack cocaine, mick jagger, Bill Cosby, crazy cat lady, jennifer aniston, tatum oneal, auction, jerry hall, sweater

• Money Porn: New Five Dollar Bill Purple and Tumescent With Legal Tender

  Behold, the latest in crack cocaine purchasing technology: our nation's newest five dollar bill. Designed to replace the last new five dollar bill -- which was introduced late last week and was notable for its for its incorporation of Abe Lincoln's raging case of encephalitis into his portrait -- this way better bill comes in purple and green or green and purple (just like The Incredible Hulk!) and contains twice as many cameras and sensors to monitor your spending and well-being. Also: it's gonna be worth less every day until January 20, 2009. Have a great recession, everybody! Posted Feb 20 2008, 12:00 PM by Bryan Christian with | with no comments Filed under: money, crack cocaine, money porn, the new five, abraham lincoln