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• Sexy Garden Gnomes Offend Wankers

  In West Midlands, UK, the Old Guard is trying desperately to prevent its open-minded seniors from corrupting the youth with their naked garden gnomes. The full, horrific and incredibly graphic photos of these hideous beasts-- along with equally hilarious quotes from those who seek to save us from these insults to our mores-- after the jump... Read More... Posted Apr 21 2009, 11:59 AM by Brian Fairbanks with | with no comments Filed under: gnomes, nudity, england, asses, bearded men, nudie pics, british, conservative, sfw, naked men, bearded man of the week, bearded men with bellies, garden

• Bearded Men On Craig's List: Or, How We'll Get Scanner Emily To Move Back To NYC

  We're recovering from public nudity burnout after this morning's news and for some idiotic reason, decided that a sane refuge would be the Craig's List Missed Connection section. Based on what we've come across in the w4m section, a mysterious brand of man has taken over the city of New Amsterdam... Read More... Posted Feb 24 2009, 02:42 PM by Brian Fairbanks with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: dating, rock and roll, warren zevon, music, missed connection, New York City, craigslist, scanner emily, bearded men, jim james, my morning jacket, relationship, bearded man of the week, beards are sexy, bearded men with bellies, beard vs. beard

• Did You Hear? The Beard is Back (File Under: No Sh*t, MSNBC)

  Breaking news from MSNBC!!!: the beard is back! Also, it's a recession trend. No really. It's a totally brand new recession trend only made trendy by the trendy recession. Read More... Posted Feb 10 2009, 03:03 PM by Emily Farris with | with 3 comment(s) Filed under: video, msnbc, trends, adult swim, facial hair, recession food, bearded man of the week, scanner emily loves bearded men, beards are sexy, bearded men with bellies, zach galifianakis, good beards, god vs. bad, blue beards, rick rubin, new beards, old beards, beard vs. beard, young beards, bad beards, the snuggler, scanner emily loves beards, future husband, funny videos, beards in a recession, facial hair in a recession, recession recession recession!!!, recession trends

• Bearded Man of the Week: Justin Vernon

  We've heard Bon Iver's "Skinny Love" played all over the place for the last six months or so, always thinking we were listening to TV on the Radio. We should know better, considering Kyp Malone of TVOTR used to be our upstairs neighbor. But, apparently living close to coolness does not make one cool. After discovering that the man singing was Justin Vernon we set out to learn one thing: does he have a beard? You fucking bet he does. Read More... Posted Feb 03 2009, 06:37 PM by Emily Farris with | with 5 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, santa, mustache, Lost, bloggers, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, Prince William, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, joaquin phoenix, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, bon iver, santa's beard, dr. jack shephard, jack shephard, ben linus, skinny love, kyp malone, justin vernon

• We Finally Found a Beard We Simply Cannot Endorse

  Did you ever think that we'd meet a beard we didn't love? Well, kids. Today we did. Read More... Posted Jan 23 2009, 12:01 PM by Emily Farris with | with 3 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, new york, video, santa, mustache, New York City, bloggers, Christmas, India, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, Prince William, fetishes, kansas city, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, joaquin phoenix, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard, 2009, longest beard in the world, spirituality, world's longest beard

• Bearded Man of the Week: Dr. Jack Shephard

  It's pretty obvious to everyone by this point that the LOST producers and writers have no idea what they're talking about. So we're not surprised that two of the producers last night called Dr. Jack Shephard's beard "gross." While we saw the beard in Season 4, it made a re-appearance in Season 5. And since stupid Ben Linus made Jack shave it off last night, we will honor the great beard that was, after the jump.  Read More... Posted Jan 22 2009, 05:43 PM by Emily Farris with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, santa, mustache, Lost, bloggers, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, Prince William, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, joaquin phoenix, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard, dr. jack shephard, jack shephard, ben linus

• Our Bearded Man of Last Week Has Some Issues

  So, we're starting to think we should just find a homeless dude to be our boyfriend. Because we're definitely not turned off by this picture of Joaquin Phoenix. In fact—well, never mind... Anyway, that's not why we're posting it. The poor guy fell at a concert last week and after watching the video (after the jump) we want to just scoop him up and hug him. And maybe, just maybe, throw him in a shower to sober him up. But we're keeping the beard! Read More... Posted Jan 22 2009, 02:07 PM by Emily Farris with | with 3 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, santa, mustache, bloggers, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, homeless, Prince William, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, joaquin phoenix, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard, 2009, january 2

• Bearded Men of the Week: Unshaven Bartenders in New York

  Last month, a slew of New York City bartenders decided to grow out their beards, just for the hell of it. Well, that and to make us rethink our rule against dating bartenders. And our decision to leave to leave New York. Glorious hairy pictures after the jump... Read More... Posted Jan 15 2009, 06:57 PM by Emily Farris with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, new york, santa, mustache, New York City, bloggers, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, Prince William, fetishes, kansas city, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, joaquin phoenix, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard, 2009, bartenders, january 15

• Bearded Man of the Week: Joaquin Phoenix

  We've always like Joaquin Phoenix just fine. We loved him in "Walk the Line" and even, shamefully, in "The Village." But we've never wanted to, you know, shove him into the nearest bathroom stall and rip his clothes of. Well, not until now, anyway. Joaquin grew a beard! Read More... Posted Jan 08 2009, 05:37 PM by Emily Farris with | with 3 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, santa, mustache, bloggers, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, Prince William, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, joaquin phoenix, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard, 2009, january 2

• Bearded Man of the Week: Prince William

  Sorry we're a little (okay, a lot) late on the Bearded Man this week. Believe it or not, we had a hard time coming up with one (send bearded men to scanner@nerve.com or straight to Scanner Emily in Kansas City!) until we saw this little headline: "POLL: What Do You Think of Prince William’s New Beard?" Read More... Posted Jan 02 2009, 04:01 PM by Emily Farris with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, santa, mustache, bloggers, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, Prince William, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard, 2009, january 2

• Bearded Man of the Week: There Could Only Be One

  I was busy moving into my new apartment yesterday so I wasn't able to post the bearded man of the week. But come on folks, this week it could really only be one guy—the ultimate bearded man... Read More... Posted Dec 23 2008, 02:12 PM by Emily Farris with | with 1 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, santa, mustache, bloggers, 2008, Christmas, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, december 8, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, santa claus, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women, santa's beard

• Bearded Woman of the Week: Erin Dollar

  No, we have not run out of bearded men to feature here on Scanner after just three short weeks (even though we seem to have no access to them, the world is full of beautiful bearded men), but we did come across a bearded woman who is a little bit our soul mate and a lot our hero. Oh, also she's absolutely adorable, if you can believe it. Read More... Posted Dec 15 2008, 02:26 PM by Emily Farris with | with 2 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, mustache, bloggers, 2008, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, portland oregon, scrubs, emily farris, fetishes, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, oregon, facial hair, portland, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, december 8, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards, bearded woman of the week, fake beards, women wearing fake beards, women in beards, bearded women, men wearing fake beards, pictures of women wearing beards, erin dollar, etsy, december 15, pictures of women with beards, girl in portland who makes beards, beards on etsy, beards for women

• Bearded Man of the Week: Zach Galifianakis

  If there's one thing we love more than bearded men here at Scanner, it's funny bearded men. If there is more than one thing we love more than bearded men, the other is bearded men who are funny and also have bellies. What can we say? We like big, warm, cuddly, funny hairy dudes. Especially when it's "dangerously cold" outside. That is why our Bearded Man of the Week is comedian Zach Galifianakis. Read More... Posted Dec 08 2008, 05:53 PM by Emily Farris with | with 3 comment(s) Filed under: scanner, mustache, bloggers, pictures, funny, jezebel, comedians, bobby tisdale, wine, scrubs, emily farris, fetishes, Zach Braff, beards, nerve.com, bears, naked bloggers, facial hair, nerve scanner, naked as we came, bearded man of the week, women with facial hair, in good company soundtrack, men with facial hair, sam beam pictures, facial hair on men, the modern metrognome, iron and wine pictures, moustache, the shepherd's dog, the postal service, one man band, beam, iron, sam, pictures of iron and wine, singing in the shower, pictures of sam beam, iron & wine, the shower, garden state soundtrack, facial hair on women, our endless numbered days, metrognome, iron 'n wine, such great heights, sam beam, the creek drank the cradle, wine in the shower, scanner emily loves bearded men, what to listen to in the shower, such great heights not sung by the postal service, iron and wine, boy with a coin, shower, bloggers in pajamas, bloggers don't shower, scanner blog, blogger syndrome, bloggers not showering, objectifying men, fetishizing men, objectify men, fetishizing beards, facial hair fetishes, december 8, women who love men with bellies, bearded men with bellies, women who love bearded men, zach galifianakis, women who love bears, loving bears, men who love bears, bellies and beards