Scanner Highs and Lows: The Week We Did a Little Star F*cking

Posted by Emily Farris

 

Okay, so maybe we did more than a little star fucking. One might even say we went overbaord. 

Highs:

We drooled (and debated) over some big beautiful women.

We continued to hold out hope that our bearded man Joaquin Phoenix is a'ight. Even though he appears to be the opposite of a'ight. 

We helped a friend end a bad relationship.

We fell in love with a Koala bear.

We started to wonder if it's true that one can be either hot or smart (not both) and began to appreciate our brains a little more.

We may live in the worst dating city ever, but at least we don't live in the worst city ever.

Dr. Ruth helped us figure out what to do tomorrow night.

The Dalai Lama began following us on Twitter!

We love Lily Allen and we don't care who knows it.

We asked Judah Friedlander out (no, really, we did and he wrote back.. but if we go out I'm not blogging about it, per his request). 

Also, we kind-of, sort-of found a way to make our Ryan Gosling fantasies come true.

We found some pretty fucking cool Valentine's Day presents.

Zoorotica. 'Nuff said.

Oh, and animals that are not doing dirty things: Westminster dog show photos.

Lows:

We had to confront the fact that we've been with a lot of people, but not in a long, long time. 

And we thought Grand Theft Auto was disturbing!

The Grammys screwed M.I.A. (By the way, has she popped that baby out yet?)

After a week of eating super healthy (okay, not really), we had a strange craving for hamburgers.

We're still trying to decide what's worse: the crazy dog lady or the crazy baby lady.

Maybe we don't have a Valentine because no one knows when Valentine's Day falls on the calendar?

We cried over this video (and so did you!).

We figured out why we're deliciously fat.

Um, this baby is smarter than us (also we really love watching videos of babies).

FUCK!

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Comments

NadaGeek said:

Ever think all the click throughs are what is killing interest in this blog ? change of writers/style, ok , slow trend towards less blog reading , ok , click throughs ,, just f'ing annoying . keep trying though, but fix that please.

February 13, 2009 8:49 PM

casualencounters.com/blog/ said:

I am that bacon donut, and I'll thank you to get your dick out of my hole.

February 13, 2009 9:24 PM

About Emily Farris

Emily Farris writes about culture and food for numerous publications and websites you've probably never heard of, including her own blog eefers. Her first cookbook, "Casserole Crazy: Hot Stuff for Your Oven" was published in 2008. Emily recently escaped New York and now lives in a ridiculously large apartment in Kansas City, MO with her cat, but just one... so far.

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