We've all done it: signed on to Facebook, seen that status update at the top, the one that hasn't been updated since 2006, still saying you're at a great party and wish everyone was there. So, you clear the status and say to yourself, "Why can't I be brilliant and creative and sound like I'm getting laid just to prove to that Racer X guy that I can?"
Well, you could do worse better than this silly new website: generateus.
Here are some of the Facebook status updates it came up for me, based on my name and my gender:
Brian knows he's getting old when he stoops to tie his shoes and wonders what else he can do while he's down there
Brian loves his job. That's why he saves it for later.
That one works: it's true that I'm just getting it together this afternoon. But man, could these be any more dull? Why not just clear your status and stop Tweeting and boring people with our every move?
Brian is contemplating internal combustion, since the match won't stay lit long enough to ignite the gunpowder he's eaten today.
Brian is embarrassing his children. A full time occupation.
Brian wonders whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have an "S" in it?
Come on, if we have this kind of time, why don't we come up with better bullshit on our own?
Via generateus.
Related:
