There's a Lifetime movie in here somewhere... if the female leads in Lifetime movies were kidnapping rapist beauty pageant winners who fall in love with Mormon missionaries, stalk them for decades, change their names, go on the lam, and turn up in the news in 2008 as the owner of cloned dogs... 

Time Magazine broke a story that shows Bernann McKinney, owner of five pitbulls she claims to have have had cloned in Seoul from the ear of her beloved (now deceased) former dog, to be, with a great degree of certainty, none other than wanted bail jumper Joyce McKinney, the former Miss Wyoming. 

There is so much goodness here, you're just going to have to settle for the original, full-length piece, although here's a taste in the meantime:

The 27-year-old McKinney was accused in court [in 1977]... of abducting 21-year-old Mormon missionary Kirk Anderson from a church in a London suburb... [where] he was chained to a [cottage] bed and forced to have sex with McKinney for three days. McKinney, once a Mormon herself, was said to have formed a crush on him after they'd first had sex in '75. Anderson tried to break off the relationship but McKinney... stalked him to England where [he'd become a] missionary to escape her attentions. 

McKinney claimed that she was trying to rekindle her affair with Anderson using techniques of seduction recommended by... The Joy of Sex.

McKinney told the court that the chains, fur-lined manacles, rope, chloroform and wedding trousseau complete with "pink feathers and see-through nighties" were all props for the bondage sessions she planned for [him.] "We had such a fun time — just like old times," McKinney told the court in her native North Carolina drawl. "I love him so much that I would ski naked down Mount Everest with a carnation up my nose if he asked me to," she added. Such sexual frankness rather stuck out in a magistrates court in sedate, suburban Surrey, England, in those days.

For his part, Anderson claimed that he'd been kidnapped at gunpoint, forced to have sex while chained to the bed (and twice more unchained), and that, despite being six foot four and 240 lbs., had never resisted. "I had made a plan for my release," Anderson testified, "but it wasn't through running away. I was going to cooperate." Even after his ordeal, when McKinney and May drove him back to London and a long lunch in Trafalgar Square, he still cooperated.

We call bullshit on that last paragraph-- the entire paragraph. Anyway, there is some plausibility to this story; McKinney then went on the run with a friend who was also involved in the kidnapping, ending up in police custody in Atlanta, although she was released because her case was felt to be unworthy of an extradition order. In 1984, McKinney was busted again, this time in Utah, outside Anderson's office, with rope and handcuffs in her car. "Consensual," my ass. Soon after, all traces of her disappear... until...

In Seoul... [she] denied... that she is one and the same Joyce McKinney who is still technically a fugitive from British justice... Both [McKinney and Bernann] are former beauty queens, both often use a wheelchair, both owned a pitbull. And on the voter's register of Avery County, the North Carolina birthplace of the onetime Miss Wyoming, there is listed one Joyce Bernann McKinney. A clone perhaps?

 Via Time.