As many of you already know, Friday I was jetted away on a party plane to Las Vegas to celebrate the launch of Thrillist's Vegas edition. The best way I can think to describe Thrillist is Daily Candy for men.
I was skeptical at first. Party plane? Las Vegas? A party plane to Las Vegas? But after a few drinks I quickly warmed up to my new friends and even got all dolled up for the club (though I only stayed about 20 minutes).
But you know what I learned? You can put Scanner Emily in Las Vegas but she's still Scanner Emily... except when she's in Vegas she's not wearing a dirty t-shirt.. and that's something, right?
I learned a few other things, too...
5. Julia Allison is just as pretty in person.
I don't
know how friendly she is because she didn't seem to want to talk to
anyone who didn't have a camera, but yeah, she's pretty. And surprisingly kind-of normal sized.
4. SPF 15 is not enough.
Not even at 9 a.m.
3. What happens in Vegas stays on your ass.
After my drunk twittering, and before I lost $128 on the slot machines, I stopped off for what I thought would be a healthy dinner. I might as well have had a deep-fried burger dipped in mayonnaise and then deep fried again. I don't think there was any lettuce on my Thai chicken salad. But there was really too much dressing on it for me to tell.
2. Drinking and texting still do not mix.
Yes, I should have learned this lesson twice before. While I like to pride myself on my ability to, at the very least, spell check and keep anything I write mostly free of typos, drunk twittering makes me sound like a dumbass. "Hair jell?" Really?
1. I'm too old for Vegas.
While I had a lot of fun (thanks Thrillist and Jetblue!), I think I was the least drunk person on the trip. I did get drunk enough to misspell some shit, but I think I had a total of four drinks on Friday; many people were drinking at a rate of four an hour. A few years ago I would have gotten wasted just because the drinks were free, but I was thinking more about the way I'd feel the next morning and less about the fact that I probably could have gotten laid if I'd just poured back a few more. I got up early to explore the strip and waited in a line of about 40 people for an iced coffee from Starbucks. While everyone was recovering from their hangovers on the flight home, I kicked back, enjoyed a bloody Mary and cried hysterically while watching "The Notebook." Hm... maybe I'm not so old after all?
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