Although this trailer is not at all promising, we're still holding out hope that a satire of the Iraq War, starring John Cusack in a sort-of rehash of his Grosse Pointe Blank role as a hitman hired by the former VP of the United States (Dan Aykroyd, clearly playing himself) to kill a rival of his Halliburton-like company, will be the fictional Fahrenheit 9/11 of the year.

There are, admittedly, several troubling moments in this trailer...

1) The presence of Hillary Duff anywhere in the film.

2) The presence of Hillary Duff as an Asian sex kitten, which is hilarious in limitless ways. On a pool table. Troubling because it might actually be sexy, and we find being attracted to Hillary Duff about as off-putting as discovering your friend's kid is now a hot college coed.

3) Ben Kingsley, phoning it in. Which for him means simply "stealing the show" and not "stealing the show and winning Oscars for it."

4) No good satire, just a bunch of jokes (i.e. "How's My Driving?" and "that's a bombing," which is not quite satiric.)

5) We lost interest halfway through. Anyone else? 

War, Inc. opens on Friday.