Last night, I took the first step toward making my dreams come true: I went to a burlesque class. (And no, that's not me in the picture. All of my dreams haven't come true yet).
Offered by the Learning Annex (I know) in a high school classroom, I joined 14 women ranging from their 20's to 40's for "Bedroom Burlesque." Some were there to learn to please their men, some wanted to get back in touch with their "sensual selves" and others just wanted to learn a few new moves. I fell into the last category with a side of harboring a not-so-secret burlesque fantasy for the last few years. I also almost fell over a few times. I'm one of those people who is 17 times sexier and 17 times more balanced in heels. And of course, I wore flats. This made me realize if I ever had to take a sobriety test in flats, I don't think I'd pass, even if was sober.
Anyway, the class was taught by the super-hot Veronica Varlow (pictured), and promised to help women in get in touch with their inner seductresses. I was skeptical. And a little shy at first. I'd forgotten if I ever had an inner seductress to begin with (it's been a long, cold winter). But she put feather boas on us as soon as we walked in the room and after a few minutes of shimmying to Nina Simone, we were all pretty comfortable swinging our hips, and each of us had mastered at least one move. Mine was a slow squat (to put it in the most unsexy words ever) which I went home and did about 57 times in front of the mirror. Inner seductress found, even if I was only seducing myself. But the best part was really watching 14 women transform from business casual to burlesque babes in a matter of hours.
Covered in black dye from the feather boa, I left with a pair of opera-length black gloves that I now know how to take off with my heels (when I do wear them), some new moves, and plans to attend a four-week burlesque course with Veronica in March. So watch out for Starry Night coming to a Brooklyn burlesque stage near you. You know, if I don't fall over and bust my face before that happens.
[Veronica Varlow: dangerdame.com]
