Dear Bobby,

This cold, dry weather is giving me dandruff in some unexpected places... you know, "down there." What can I do to make it go away? I have a big date Friday night and I want to be fresh and clean and smooth.

Thanks,
Dry 'n Dirty
Fairbanks, AK

Dear Dry and Dirty, 

You're not alone. Hundreds of Alaskans suffer from dryness down there every winter. Try Listerine. Not only does it kill the funk in your mouth, it’s actually very good for dry, flaky skin.

Ladies, I don’t want to brag, but this cold wintry weather dries the shit out of my scalp and I tell you what, Listerine completely got rid of my condition after just one application! I only used it on my head, but I’ve tried everything; mayonnaise, apple cider vinegar, raw eggs and, of course, every dandruff shampoo in the book. (more like “sham-boos”. ) Nothing worked… until now. I don’t know why or how, but original Listerine Antiseptic works amazingly well and leaves your "scalp" feeling super fresh and clean.

My mom told me a few weeks ago that she heard on NPR that Listerine was the best thing for dry skin and scalp and I finally tried it. And just like The Monkees would say, I’m a believer!

This is what I did. I took two caps full of the mouth wash and rubbed it into my scalp. And after two minutes I rinsed it out in the shower. If you want to get creative with your application, ask your lover to gargle with it first and then spit it on your head.

I know I write a bunch of BS and make-up fake interviews and whatnot, but when it comes to health and beauty tips, I speak the truth.

Good luck and let me know what happens. But don’t send me any negative comments because it hurts my feelings. (I’m a sensitive libra by the way).

Have a beauty question for Bobby? Send it to scanner@nerve.com.