61 Frames Per Second : cole stryker

Roundtable Discussion: Pushing the Envelope on Sex and Nudity

Amber Ahlborn — Fri, 20 Mar 2009 20:30:00 GMT

Relatively recently Grand Theft Auto news made waves by showing a full frontal male nudity scene. Now, this is hardly the first time a human being, male or female, has been shown nekkid in a game. You can at least go back as far as the reprehensible Custer's Revenge for the Atari to find a digital representation of male genitals. The question is, do we really need this sort of thing in a video game?

Amber's Take: Now, anyone who knows me also knows I'm a bit of a prude. I really am not interested in having certain pieces of anatomy on public display. That said, I don't have a problem with sex or the related bits in video games. What I take issue with is how it's used. I think the full exposure in the GTA scene serves no purpose other than to shout out "Hey, we did this because we could!"

For most of the scene, the camera teases around the main character and very strongly gets the message across that this guy has no shame. As a way of portraying a character trait, it's incredibly effective. There is no question the character is a slime ball. The final bit that shows his bits adds nothing other than a superfluous ick factor (all the more repulsive due to the character already sliding down the side of the Uncanny Valley).

Another thing I take issue with is when sex is used to trivialize people, usually women, in games. I think the force of my sneer actually radiated heat when I learned about the sex mini games that have been popping up in certain titles already drowning in their own testosterone.

Like violence, sex and basic human anatomy can be used to shock people. This in and of itself isn't necessarily a negative. Unfortunately, it's far too easy to use these elements in a cheap and base way, rather than as effective story telling tools or ways to drive messages home. If you want to shock my sensibilities, fine, more power to you. I only have a problem with games that insult my intelligence and use the medium to degrade and dehumanize.

Cole's Take: I cannot think of a single instance in which sexual content has improved a game. I talked about this recently when I discussed God of War. I think that sex is used so often in media because creative types and business people operate under the false assumption that sex sells. I won't get into it here, but I took a class back in college that put the theory to rest. Yes, in some cases, steamy content will increase awareness about a particular movie, game, or whatever, but all things being equal, sexual content rarely has a measurable effect on sales. Which is why I find it so bizarre that developers, like the GoW guys, think that they absolutely have to have sex minigames, lest they disappoint fans.

I feel about sexual content the same way I feel about excessive, gory violence. It's cheap. I'd just as soon go back and play Starsiege: Tribes, which had no blood or gore, than a Controversial M-Rated Shooter. Game mechanics are what excites my senses, not titillating imagery. If one really wanted to be turned on, there are many, many superior alternatives outside of gaming that can be used to exercise that unsavory impulse, if you know what I mean and I think that you do.

Joe's Take: I'm going to play a bit of devil's advocate here and say that for now, pushing the envelope just for the sake of pushing the envelope is a-okay. Videogaming is still a medium in adolescence, particularly in terms of how it is perceived by the public on a whole. In order to get on even footing with other mediums it has to do everything those mediums do, and has to do it in a way that gets attention. This actually makes "Hey, we did this because we could!" a valid reason to put in shocking content.

Of course the fact that this course of action is necessary for the overall health of medium doesn't defend certain crass, base implementations of shocking content, which of course can be horrendous and cause short-term damage to the perception of games on a whole. This is a sort of collateral damage, though. If you want to be able to expand the visual language of games to include the same taboo bits as cinema or HBO you have to let everyone (or rather, everyone willing to get an M or AO-rating) use the taboo bits, and not everyone will use them in a way that is within reasonable societal norms. The overall impact will still be positive, as it will create a genuinely mature way for games to discuss genuinely mature themes.

Note that I'm not defending any of Amber's examples. I've not seen the Lost and Damned content, and God of War's minigame, though maybe justifiable as a characterization device in the first game, did not need to be in the later games. Custer's Revenge was the most deplorable part of a thankfully failed experiment to create an adult games industry similar to the adult film industry--that sort of effort will always be consigned to the gutters, and isn't really relevant to games as a medium.

Related Links:

Roundtable Discussion: Genre Design Evolution

Roundtable Discussion: The Fandom Phenomenon Part 1

Roundtable Discussion: Where is the Handheld Version of Console Wars?

How to Cook like a Tauren

Cole Stryker — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 15:00:00 GMT

"Tired of your character getting all the great food?" So begins the sales pitch for one of the interent's quirkier e-books. Some internet hero has developed a cookbook based on the fictional delicacies found within World of Warcraft's Tauren territories. Dee-lish.

You've fought like a Tauren and died like a Tauren (and probably taken more than a few with you,) so why not eat like a Tauren? In real life. Why should you only be able to eat Poached Sunsdcale Salmon in-game? You've seen Delicious Cave Mold dropping here and there, but what's it really like?

Mmm. Cave mold.

Just picture it- your brave crew of weary warriors, casters, and cannon fodder gathers around the campfire after slaying that boss and his horde (again,) and what do all of you want? Some limp wimpy green salad? NO! You want comfort food! Hot and tasty DragonBreath Chili, Seasoned Wolf Kabobs, or Roast Raptor are just the stuff these crusaders need to banish the fatigue and get back to slaying!

It goes on like this for a few pages. You get the idea. With over sixty recipes, this has to be the most comprehensive WoW-related cookbook on the market. And a steal at only $19.97.

But wait! There's more! Order now and get a free mini-cookbook, whatever that is. Read more at Tauren Chef.

Related Links:

Play Bejeweled Inside World of Warcraft

Up All Night: Blackthorne

Free to Play MMO's: Where do You Draw the Line?

Dr. Mario Supports Universal Healthcare

Cole Stryker — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 02:00:00 GMT

McSweeney's Internet Tendency has been a great source of game-related satire, with pieces like:

Things a Lieutenant Would Say to His Men Before Combat If, Instead of Soldiers in a Central American Revolutionary Conflict, He Thought They Were Characters in Contra for Nintendo.
Expert Help for your Fantasy Baseball Franchise (with an all-Nintendo cast of characters).
Halo 3 Cheat Codes, as Explained by Neglected Girlfriend, Janet Iverson
Pick-up Lines Used by Mario

Here comes the latest spoof, wherein Dr. Mario Weighs in on Universal Healthcare.

Are we under one of Bowser's spells? A basic human need like health care should not be monetized. Even our pack dinosaurs and humanoid mushrooms deserve coverage—a healthy workforce generates more points and 1-ups, increasing the chances of long-term gameplay for everyone. Clearly, a forward-thinking health-care plan, as seen in other gaming systems, some of which I will outline below, is the right choice. Yet even Princess Peach is full of disinformation on the subject. Why? It's me, Dr. Mario. Fueled by my own self-interest, I prescribed my medication, wrote articles promoting it in respected publications, and played right into the HMOs' greedy hands.

Dr. Mario compares the Mushroom Kingdom's health care system with that of Samus's Planet Zebes and Sonic the Hedgehog's "idyllic world" (duuude, Mobius). Maybe I'm exhasted, but I couldn't help but get a few chuckles.

Gordon Freeman's Prank Call

Two Stupid Viral Videos for Your Friday

New Mobile App Turns Life into a Video Game

Cole Stryker — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 17:00:00 GMT

The Observer reports that couple of technorati dudes from New York are beginning to market Foursquare, a mobile application that rewards users for going out and having a social life.

With Foursquare, users can download a mobile application that will let their friends know exactly where they are (by text message, Twitter and on maps, too!), and also find fun, new things to do in spots in their immediate location--"like, try this specific beer at Spitzer's Corner," Mr. Selvadurai explained. Users can create their own tips and track all the cool things they've done (in a "Top 12") and the things they want to do (in a "To Do" list).

OK, so it's kind of like yelp.com, which allows folks to rate and recommend restaurants, museums, parks, and other hotspots to each other. And there's also a bit of Twitter thrown in for good measure. But it's much more than that.

But it's also a nightlife game. Users rack up points based on how many new places they visit, how many stops they've made in one night and who else has been there. You become a "mayor" of a hot spot if you're there often. Mr. Crowley used an example of Spitzer's Corner, where Nate Westheimer, N.Y.T.M.'s head organizer, hangs out. "If you check in there one more time than Nate, then you get a message, 'Oh you stole the title of mayor from Nate,'" Mr. Crowley told the Observer in a phone interview this morning. "People get kind of competitve about this." There's a "Leaderboard" which lists the most adventurous users with the most points.

Eventually, players are rewarded with little acheivements with no real value. However, I can see that changing very soon if this thing takes off, which it will, at least in major cities. If they bring in advertisers and sponsors, they would easily be able to offer hip prizes like free drinks, clothes, concert tickets, or even a Vespa. When I see girls on Facebook who have absolutely no interest in video games growing eggs and adding flair to their walls, I'm convinced that something like this would possibly be even more popular with a traditionally non-gaming audience. I'd play.

Cooking Papa: Look at the World like a Game

Wizards of the Coast Gives You -1 Charisma on Facebook

Watch The Last Express Like a Cartoon

Cole Stryker — Tue, 10 Mar 2009 14:00:00 GMT

The cult-classic rotoscoped The Last Express has been uploaded to Vimeo, and now you can watch all the cutscenes in the form of several video clips, the collection of which runs about 75 minutes.

The Last Express was one of the most expensive games of its day. It's a classic murder mystery set in the golden age of rail travel on the inimitable Orient Express. With 44,000 hand-drawn frames of animation, and countless hours required to play out each scene with real actors, it is worth watching a few clips just to see what kind of effort was poured into this game. Tragically, The Last Express is one of gaming history's greatest flops. Due to corporate restructuring, the developer's marketing department was unable to promote the game, and it was only on retail shelves for a few weeks. Sadly, the game was out of print within a year.

Here's Part 1:

(via Kotaku)

Mega Man is a Dick

Totally Bogus!: Club Mario

Gaming for Therapy: A Rabbi Plays Call of Duty

Cole Stryker — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 15:00:00 GMT

Oy vey. A freelance rabbi (whatever that means) plays Call of Duty: World at War, and it helps him to face the horrors of World War II era persecution of the Jews. That's the schpiel that Micah Kelber is spinning:

The surprising benefit of the game was that throughout my entire life, since sneaking into the synagogue library with David Yagobian and paging through a book of Nazi medical experiments, I have had nightmares about Nazis. Jewish summer camp didn’t help. In games like “Call of Duty,” you get unlimited lives; you keep playing the game until you are victorious. It’s a safe place. When your character dies, you may have to go back to a checkpoint, but this is simply inconvenient, never tragic or final. You will always have another chance to kill your demons.

So, playing Call of Duty helped Micah face his fears:

One morning, I woke up extremely aware that I had just had a Nazi dream. No surprise, given that I wrote this review and played the game late into the night. But I was shocked that it did not scare me as it would have done in the past: The back of my neck was dry. The game had subconsciously flipped a switch. Although clearly there are still very real threats to Jews around the world, the feeling that Nazis were a threat to my existence was created by teachers and rabbis, rightly making sure that I knew my history. In truth, that specific anxiety was not real, but virtual. And I could vanquish it virtually, as well.

This behavior fascinates me. I can't remember ever facing down a fear through video games, but I guess it makes sense. On the face of it, this seems like a completely healthy way for a person to deal with fear, but I wonder if there could be negative permutations of this behavior.

What about the school shooter who creates a Doom map based on the layout of his school? It would seem that if the mind can so closely relate virtual reality and "real reality", there could be just as many opportunities for destruction as there are for restoration. Personally I think that it's best if our virtual killing has no psychological connection to real-world killing, though I'm sure Micah's experience was not intentional.

The Ten Videogames That Should Have Been Controversial, Part 2

Industry Predictions for 2009: Doom and Gloom Edition

Sauerkraut is My New Favorite Games Video Journo

Cole Stryker — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 14:00:00 GMT

He's tastier than Yahtzee, goes down smoother than the Mega 64 guys: He's Kraut! And he's the newest, most Teutonic video game pundit. Marvel as a bowl of sauerkraut takes us on a tour through video game history. Tetris, Prince of Persia, Scorched Earth, Breakout and Pacman. It's simple, it's sublime, it made me choke on my breakfast.

Video after the jump:

My favorite part:

"...many thanks to Corrado's mother for cooking Kraut."

(via Kotaku)

Related Links:

Left 4 Dead Snaps into a Slim Jim

Mega Man is a Dick

Try to Eat Eggs – But Not Bombs!

Roundtable Discussion: Genre Design Evolution

Derrick Sanskrit — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 13:00:00 GMT

Roundtable Discussion takes the intrepid 61FPS blogging team and pits it against itself in the search for deeper truth. The moderator for today is Derrick Sanskrit.

Hey kids, I think it's time for another roundtable chat. I've actually been wanting to ask this of you guys for a few weeks now, because I've noticed that lately I've been playing a lot of games I never would have even considered playing as a kid. Am I alone in this or are we all doing it?

What sorts of games are you playing now that you didn't play during what I assume was the glorious childhood heyday of gaming we all experienced? What sorts of games did you play then that you don't now? Have our tastes changed or have we merely opened/closed ourselves to certain experiences? What is fundamentally different about how these games are made now and how has overall design changed over time, affecting us as game consumers?

I know that's a bit of a loaded series of questions, so I'll kick things off.

I pretty much never played racing games as a kid. As a lifelong urban New Yorker, I never romanticized the concept of driving a car and have veered away from it for as long as I've been able. My college roommates pressured me into playing Gran Turismo, but it was Need For Speed Underground that made me a convert.

Joe: Haha, yeah. Need for Speed Underground is the secret best racing game of the PS2 era, and given the state of the franchise these days might be the only Need for Speed I'll ever...need. I thought I was the only one.

Derrick: Right? It felt like such a guilty pleasure. I began to appreciate racing games the same way I appreciate traditional science fiction: they're based in reality, but you do things that you should never ever EVER do in reality. EVER. And now I'm all about Burnout Paradise, a racing game where they break so many rules of what you should and shouldn't do with cars that they can't even legally use the likenesses of real-world vehicles. I love smashing rival cars off the side of the road. I love doing barrel rolls over open bridges. I hate being in actual cars, now, because I keep thinking the other cars will do all of that... but I still secretly smile.

Another genre I find myself seriously enjoying these days is the shmup/arcade shooter, which is wild because I HATED the shmup when I was a kid. Never got along with the memorization of R-Type, nor was I ever quite ADD enough for Geometry Wars. This is where design comes in, though. Genuinely thoughtful and creative game designers who love the shmup have gone about putting their own unique spins on the genre lately. From the simplified only-boss-battles-no-power-ups rRootage to the minimal-shooting-equals-sensory-overload Every Extend (Extra) to the additive-soundtrack-suggestively-philosophical Everyday Shooter to the bright-colors-we'll-make-up-out-own-damn-rules Big Bang Mini, I find that I LOVE avoiding one-hit destruction and blowing shit up. I'm even enjoying Retro Game Challenge's "Star Prince" a great deal, and that's just a rehash of the classic Star Soldier. It's not just these ones either. There's a plethora of artistically experimental shmups on the internet that, while still over my head as far as gameplay goes, fascinate me.

Cole: I don't think there's a specific genre that I play now that I didn't before, though I am much more likely to play online multiplayer games now than then, simply because I have the technology to do so at my fingertips.

Another thing that's changed for me over the years is that I've developed a much more discerning palate. As a kid, I got my hands on maybe two games a year (one for Christmas, one for my birthday). You best believe I finished each one to completion, no matter how frustrating, no matter how poorly designed. No cheats, no Game Genies. No Warp Zones.

Today, I only continue to play a game if it thrills me. I don't feel obligated to play through a game (unless of course I'm doing a review) just because. My time is much more precious than money, now that I'm a young urban professional. This has a huge impact on the way I approach leisure time in general. I'm much more interested in games that offer high-impact fun, even if they don't offer epic quests and cutting-edge visuals, as well.

Derrick: I remember being like that, Cole, getting a check from my grandmother every birthday and trying to decide which game was worth playing until the next special occasion that I had money for another game. Kirby's Dream Land 2 and Donkey Kong '94 were both acquired that way and they had metric tons of replay value, so I was happy for years. I think I've traded back more games for my DS than I ever owned for my Game Boy.

Joe: In terms of pure genres, I would say that I play less of them now than I did as a kid. The reason for this: I am a casualty of genre design bloat.

Although it's worse in some genres, generally speaking most of them have through the years experienced an increase in design complexity, which in turn makes the communities that play those genres smaller and more insular. For the types that I've invested myself heavily in, I'm able to keep up-the vagaries of modern JRPGs and 3D action/adventure platformers are something I can handle, and to an extent first-person shooters also don't provide a problem (modern shooting games actually straddle a line between feature bloat and blockbuster accessibility that makes many of them interesting beasts).

But at the same time, I've been pushed out of genres I used to enjoy: RTS (the last one I played a lot was Warcraft III), 2D Fighting (Marvel vs Capcom 2), shoot 'em ups (okay, I always sucked at these. You get my point). If something comes out in these genres that offers increased accessibility or something really new and fascinating, I will likely check them out because well, I love games. But I do feel like for the most part, these things aren't for me like they used to be.

Derrick: Just out of curiosity, Joe, why do you feel you lost interest in those genres? I know I used to play every Capcom fighter fiendishly, but now I practically had SSF2THDR forced upon me and I still can't muster up the enthusiasm to buy Street Fighter 4.

Joe: I didn't lose interest in them so much as they became too esoteric for me. A great example is the Guilty Gear series. I love guitar witches as much as the next red-blooded young man, but with all of its dead angles and false roman cancels the actual mechanics of the game are completely opaque to me. I cannot for the life of me translate such complicated glyphs into meaningful gameplay, let alone fun.

Derrick: That is a great example. Guilty Gear XX Accent Core Plus was playable at New York Comic-Con and I remember seeing a crowd of kids playing it with the general air of "so what? Its the same game we've played a million times" floating on all of their eyes. The sheer number of instant-kill moves I saw performed was staggering. There should be no such thing as an instant kill move. That defeats the "game" of it! And these kids were just used to it because they somehow wrapped their heads around it years ago!

Joe: The biggest exception to this rule is western RPGs, led by the console-based development of BioWare. For example, Baldur's Gate is an intricate and terrifying beast to me, but Mass Effect is one of my favorite games of all time. I also love Bethesda's new work, but the procedural wilds of early Elder Scrolls games scare the hell out of me. It's the best example of a genre that's actually trying to slim itself down, which in my opinion is making the games in it a lot easier to get into, yet no less engrossing once you're in.

Derrick: Alright, that's all the time we have for this discussion right now. I want to thank Cole and Joe for sharing with me here today. The conversation doesn't have to end here, 61fpsers. Keep it going in the comments!

Previously Roundtable Discussions:
The Relevance of Japanese RPGs
Where is the Handheld Version of Console Wars?
The Fandom Phenomenon part 1 - part 2 - part 3

Final Fantasy VII and How Nostalgia Colors Opinions

Cole Stryker — Mon, 09 Mar 2009 12:00:00 GMT

A few days ago I rhapsodized about A Boy and His Blob, only to have Bob Mackey provide me with a reality check. The game had its flaws. He's right! This morning I read IGN's roundtable discussion on Final Fantasy VII, which set out to determine if the game is overrated.

I don't think FFVII could have possibly come at a better time in order to enjoy canonical status today. A huge portion of today's video game journalists were probably ten to fifteen when the game was released. I vividly remember seeing the game's trailers aired during ABC's TGIFriday. Even my parents were impressed.

FFVII did a lot of things right. Emotional impact, grand scale, excellent atmosphere. These are the things we are likely to remember about video games. Much moreso than the battle systems and core mechanics, areas in which many people feel the game fell short. My point is, thinking back to those days when you're a rugrat, dwarfed by you parents' 27" Sanyo, staring wide-eyed as the Jenova conspiracy unravels before your eyes, it's easy to overlook glaring flaws. Nostalgia has no place in games criticism, if we are going to be serious with each other. I think that all reviewers are a little guilty, to a degree. Just look at my anticipation of A Boy and His Blob. But when it comes to evaluating an existing game, I try to leave the nostalgia at the door.

Know Your Final Fantasy IV Trivia. It Could Save Your Life.

Cloud's Ghostly Face Says, "More Final Fantasy VII? Only I Know, Suckahs."

Drugs Will Make You Less Effective in Online Gaming

Cole Stryker — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Remember when anti-drug organizations would persuade young people to stay away from pot because it would make them video game-playing losers? Well, times have changed and Above the Influence is now targeting those losers, claiming that they'll be losers among losers if they smoke pot.

Smoking pot affects alertness, concentration, perception, coordination and reaction time -- many of the skills required for winning a battleground, defeating an opponent, beating games in addition to safe driving and other tasks.

There are also videos of cute avatars demonstrating what it's like when you game on drugs. I feel like this is a real turning point in our culture. You want to be like those cool h4x0rz playing WoW. This is now what adults think that teens aspire to. What a wonderful world.

(via Penny Arcade)

Boy Addicted to Call of Duty 4 Found Dead

WTFriday: Sega's Turd Polish

Trailer Review: Flock

Cole Stryker — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 22:00:00 GMT

Capcom has a new game up for preorder. It's called Flock, it looks like it lies somewhere between Pikmin and Lemmings, and it's due to release in early April.

Like Lemmings, it's about moving sheep from one end of the landscape to another, only this time with a UFO avatar. With light puzzle elements and a pastoral setting, this game looks like a great little casual game. It's only a $15 download, too. Apparently it also had a "sophisticated physics engine." Who knew? I wonder why this isn't being developed for mobile devices. It seems perfect for a grab and go-type gaming experience.

Video after the jump:

Related Links:

Trailer Review: Goodbye Solo

Trailer Review: Infamous

Trailer Review: Observe and Report (Red-Band)

Facepalm: Video Game Violence

Cole Stryker — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 17:00:00 GMT

I thought we had moved past this particular breed of yellow journalism, with most mainstream news sources covering video games or launching blogs. Even USA today has a new games blog. So I was disappointed to see a large Canadian newspaper publish an article about video game violence. I don't even know where to begin!

Some kids get hooked on Guitar Hero, but the vast majority of gamers today spend more money - and time - on shockingly graphic search-and-destroy video games. Turning every violent teen male fantasy into reality, these games have a simple primal theme: kill, and kill again. And then keep killing.

Not even close to being true. Just ask Nintendo, Pop Cap, Maxis, or the dozens of casual gaming developers that have hit it big selling nonviolent games. Also hyperbolic and sensational. I thought we left this lingo behind in the days of Mortal Kombat? This sounds like something the South Park news team would have cooked up.

MLG also operates big-ticket tournaments, with substantial cash prizes going to those players with the best killing skills. Findlay sits down with the members of a Canadian team of professional gamers, who receive sponsorship from a cola company. Video games are a full-time career for the four twentysomethings, who have gamer names like G-Spot and X-Factor; one admits to playing 16 hours a day, possibly accounting for the group's collective fixed gaze.
"When we talked to them, we had large monitors playing video-game footage as background, and you could see it: They couldn't take their eyes off the screens," says Findlay.

If you put a big screen with any kind of footage in front of someone, their eyes will be drawn to it. I hate going to bars with lots of TVs because sometimes I have trouble concentrating on conversation. My eyes are pulled towards things like soccer games, for which I have absolutely no interest. Also, all teenage boys have a fixed gaze.

Ugh, can't process so much fail.

Facepalm: Will Trade Sex for Everquest

Facepalm: Kevin "Sex Box" McCullough Returns

Watcha Playing?: Spelunky

Cole Stryker — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 01:00:00 GMT

Eegra's Patrick Alexander, in a rant that I've already covered, mentioned that he really likes Spelunky a freeware adventure game that plays like a slightly and gratefully more robust La Mulana.

You play a whip-wielding adventurer in search of gold who has to avoid creepy crawlies and avoid Indiana Jones-esque deathtraps. Perhaps most interestingly, the game uses randomly generated level design, while somehow managing to retain challenge and fun. This is a common element of roguelike design, but not one that is often seen in platform games, considering how crucial level design is. But here, it works, and it makes it very replayable. The creator, Derek Yu, talks about his objectives:

My goal was to create a fast-paced platform game that had the kind of tension, re-playability, and variety of a roguelike. In roguelikes, the gameplay tells the story, and I wanted to give Spelunky that type of a feeling... but make the player rely on their reflexes rather than their brain (or knowledge of what 50 billion command keys do!). If there's a best of both worlds, that's what I was trying to go for.

It will download in a jiff, and it's definitely worth your time.

Download Spelunky here.

Related Links:

Whatcha Playing: Guadia Quest

Whatcha Playing: Far Cry 2

Whatcha Playing: Tales of Phantasia (PSX)

I Hate the Video Game Industry

Cole Stryker — Thu, 05 Mar 2009 15:30:00 GMT

I suppose I've developed a reputation for being something of a curmudgeon. Most of my posts here are accusatory and caustic, and I spend more time writing about things I don't like than things I do. That's why I consider Patrick Alexander over at Eegra to be a kindred spirit.

Like Patrick, I play precious few video games. I guess that would seem odd to readers, considering that game journalists are supposed to be experts. There might be one or two games released each year that capture my heart. Desktop Tower Defense was the last game that really brought me to my knees, and that was released years ago.

Furthermore, I can't relate to those who really get off on game industry stuff. News! Previews! Screenshots and Trailers! All the marketing and wooing and it's all so much fluff and grandstanding. If I were to quit writing about games, I would only follow a few websites that focus more on game theory and serious criticism. I don't care if Capcom employees are bisexual. I don't care if the Xbox is being released in a special color. I don't care about cosplay or Olivia Munn or Jonathan Coultan or Jack Thompson. And if I see one more gaming-related cake...

Patrick explains:

You see, I love videogames, but I hate... I hate the videogame industry, I guess. That includes the ‘enthusiast press’ – I hate this contrived idea of ‘gamers’ and ‘gaming culture’; I prefer the idea that videogames are a thing, and all sorts of people have individual experiences with this thing, among many other things, and a person’s experience might overlap with many other people’s experiences, and another person’s might not. And thus, videogames are culture; they are a part of culture. I prefer this idea because it is the correct one. When people say ‘gaming culture’, they should be saying ‘gaming cult’. They could also easily say, ‘religious nuts’.
There are denominations and everything!

Ugh, I know, right? Shut it down. All of it.

One of the things that I always thought was so tragic and true and hilarious about the Simpsons Comic Book Guy is that you never see him smile. He never derives joy from his massive collection of nerdy paraphenalia, as if he doesn't do it for the love of the thing, but rather for the ability it gives him to lord his superior taste and awareness over those pathetic philistines who enter his shop. This is how I see most readers and writers of the enthusiast press.

I'm bored of all the chatter. I want to recapture those feelings of adventure and freedom that video games brought me as an eight-year old, when video games were nothing but fun.

Ron Workman Calls Out Destructoid for Sloppy Journalism

The Future of Games Journalism

JRPG Stories: Awful

Cole Stryker — Wed, 04 Mar 2009 19:00:00 GMT

I have to watch my step around these parts, as I am surrounded by JRPG devotees. That won't stop me from making fun of them occasionally, or praising my fellow journalists when they do so. Paul Ryan at Games Radar has crafted a list of JRPG tropes out of which even superfans should get a chuckle.

Starting with the beginning, you've overslept and upon waking an old lady needs your help. While helping her you meet your best friend and someone gives you a weapon.You listen to the villages rumors about an encroaching evil, so you explore the surrounding area, only to uncover a government conspiracy/religious cult. Your village gets burned down, so you and your friends go on an epic adventure that ends with you discovering an ancient evil that can only be defeated with the power of an ancient race. There's a lot more, but I won't ruin the rest. It's worth reading in its entirety, so go do that.

This list reminds me of something I read years ago called "The Grand List of Console Role Playing Game Cliches". With nearly 200 items, it remains the definitive statement on the unoriginality of Japanese RPG writers. Come to think of it, reading this list almost makes the Games Radar list look like a complete ripoff. My favorite:

Wait! That Was A Load-Bearing Boss!
Defeating a dungeon's boss creature will frequently cause the dungeon to collapse, which is nonsensical but does make for thrilling escape scenes.

Your JRPG Narrative is Bad and You Should Feel Bad

Whatcha Listening To?: Ebben Flow Soundtrack

A Boy and His Blob Wiimake?

Cole Stryker — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 23:00:00 GMT

Imminent Nostalgia Overload Warning!

A Boy and His Blob is being remade for the Wii, published by Way Forward Technologies, according to Wikipedia. Those jerks at Nintendo Power only offer a super pixellated set of screenshots, but it's enough to make my heart soar.

Your gelatinous sidekick, Blobert, can morph into different useful items when you feed him different flavors of jelly beans. What's not to like? For all you youngin's (and I mean that like the guys on HBO's The Wire say it, not like a redneck mother) who haven't played the NES classic, here's a video to fill you in on what you've missed:

Had to include one more tidbit, this wonderfully bizarre line from Wikipedia:

The boy must make use of all of these jelly beans, collect diamonds and treasure, and defeat the final boss on Blobolonia, The Emperor, by using vitamins. The emperor has a sweet tooth to the extent that vitamins are fatal. (emphasis mine)

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Trailer Review: Watchmen: The End is Nigh

Cole Stryker — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 21:00:00 GMT

"I think Watchman is a pretty cool guy. Eh cashes in on decades of nostalgia and doesn't afraid of anything."

Alan Moore is someone for whom I have long had a deep admiration. In my mind's Artistic Integrity Roundtable, he holds court right between Steve Albini and the Coen Brothers. Moore has always distanced himself from film adaptations of his work. The filming of From Hell, V for Vendetta, and The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen left him wanting nothing to do with Hollywood, so I'm guessing the same goes for the upcoming film and video game adaptations of Watchmen. Here we have a couple of new "vignettes" released today. They look terribly mediocre, but I won't let that stop my from enjoying the original comic.

What bugs me the most about this portrayal of the characters is that they were never big, dumb brutes.The reason why the comic was so revolutionary is that it was one of the first to reveal the underlying humanness inside every super hero. These trailers do little to convince me that the game will communicate that sentiment as well. Wouldn't it have been wonderful if the franchise had been treated with the moral ambiguity of Bioshock, for example?

Oh well. Biff bang pow.

Videos after the jump:

New Watchmen Throwback Browser Game

Brawler Theory

GameSetWatch Lampoons IGN Writing

Cole Stryker — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 22:30:00 GMT

GameSetWatch's Alex Litel (always a good read) has crafted an excellent parody of IGN's editorial style. He's posted a fake review of Citizen Kane: The Videogame, a hilarious sendup of this rather stupid editorial. I'll paste my favorite paragraphs:

But it turns out the marketing by anti-marketing, was for the best. Gaming grammar may not quite be the same after the cognizant, cogent gameplay of this game. This game has a little of everything, like Grand Theft Auto IV, but on steroids and far more incredible. The game creates a nonpareil kinetic bond, whether you like or not.
Quite literally but also metaphorically, Citizen Kane: The Video Game is the Citizen Kane of video games—a marvelously applaudable feat that gallantly contorts with the poise and consistence of a second-year community college dance appreciation professor as she stoutheartedly gallops on the morbidly determined divinity to provide a blitzkrieg of introspection into the most tepid slice of Americana.

Bahaha. Yes. For whatever reason, a lot of game reviews read like this. I think it is ultimately because game writers are so insecure. They want to be respected, like Roger Ebert or Pauline Kael. They want so badly for their medium to be taken seriously by the culture at large. So they pepper their prose with awkward metaphors and hyperbole upon hyperbole. It tends to read like a high school student's college application essay, wherein the writer uses Microsoft Word's thesaurus to make each sentence that much more impenetrable.

I think my favorite part is the "Like X, but on steroids" line. This is used so often in game journalism, but tells the reader so little! Kill this phrase.

Judging from the comments at GSW, the humor is lost on most. But not me, Alex. I love you.

Related Links:

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Hasbro spent 81 Million on Virtual Reality in the Mid-90s and other Fun Facts

Cole Stryker — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 21:00:00 GMT

So says the linkedin.com profile of one Steve Tice.

That's just one juicy tidbit that I've learned from following a certain shadowy figure who runs a blog called Superannuation, dedicated to digging up factoids about the video game industry by scouring trademark databases and linkedin, a career-oriented social networking site. The blogger posts a lot of interesting info. He (or she) is always the first to know when Sony's registered a weird trademark or when a chatty careerist divulges secret info on a linkedin page.

I emailed him to try to figure out what was up. The mysterious blogger, who insists that he is no insider, signed the response as "blog author", and simply said that he slogs through databases because the some of the information "interests [him]".

A few bloggers have run with his tips without giving him credit, so I'm going to do him better with some link love. If you have a hunger for rumors and tips, then why not pay Superannuation a visit?

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Ren and stimpy SFIV Controller?

Cole Stryker — Mon, 02 Mar 2009 20:00:00 GMT

Back. The. Truck. Up.

There's a guy on the GAF forums who is friends with one of the animators from the old Nickelodeon cartoon. He had him design this one-of-a-kind Street Fighter IV arcade controller, which I'm sorta makes my head explode with nostalgia mashup overload. Ren is subbing in for Dhalsim, while Stimpy models E. Honda's trademark stripey towel.

If I were an animator, I would quit my job and just start cranking out case mods and stuff. Geeks are willing to pay hundreds or thousands for stuff like this! Imagine how much money you could make just by etching Falcor onto an Alienware box? I'm looking at you, lunchbagart guy.

Click on the GAF link above for a vastly embiggened image.

(via Tiny Cartridges)

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Relaxing Games

Cole Stryker — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 17:00:00 GMT

Yesterday I came across an article on Slate regaling thatgamecompany's Flower, calling it "the only video game I've ever played that made me feel relaxed, peaceful, and happy."

Several years ago my college buddies and I would unwind after classes with a few F-Zero GX races. There was something about the game's blinding speed that encouraged this state of zen, during which the day's stresses would melt off of our bodies.

One of my friends refused to take part. He was a long-time gamer who had given them up for college, saying that they just added stress to his day. He'd often walk in on me cursing the screen during heated Ikaruga playthroughs and ask, "How can you justify this. You're an adult. Look at what you're doing to yourself. You're not relaxed, you're furious!" And yet even though these games provided an amount of frustration, I often found them to be relaxing in an indirect way. It may look like these play experiences were only winding me up tighter, but I always felt more ready to face the day after a half hour of SSX 3.

I guess my point is that I never felt that games had to be aesthetically relaxing in order to provide me with relaxation. Sure, blowing up dudes in TF2 is frenetic and requires a great deal of brainpower, but expending that adrenaline is what brings on deep relaxation.

Am I alone, or are there others out there who find solace in bullet hell shooters and the like?

Flower - A Zen de Blob?

Indie Dev Moment: Dyson

Super Secret Castle Discovered in Shadow of the Colossus

Cole Stryker — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 18:00:00 GMT

The folks at Team ICO Gamers (whatever that is) have used an emulator in order to discover a structure in Shadow of the Colossus that didn't make it into the final game.

For years Shadow of the Colossus players have wondered what lies in the Eastern section of the map. Many suggested that this part of the map was host to the lands shown in the intro scenes of the game. What no one imagined was that it was home to something more mysterious.

Video after the jump:

Easter eggs, whether intentional or not, are a grand tradition in video games. I love to see stuff like this, especially years after a game's release. What a wonderful sense of discovery this dude must have felt. In a world of instantly available walkthroughs and endlessly detailed FAQ's, it's satisfying to recapture that childlike sense of discovery when you've found something that no one else has.

(via GameSetWatch)

Follow Up: Destructoid Reposts Crappy Review

Cole Stryker — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 22:00:00 GMT

Yesterday I lambasted Destructoid's Jim Sterling for a lazy review of Halo Wars. I won't pretend that I'm the one who inspired the change of heart, but Sterling has chosen to play through the game to completion and spend some time on multiplayer. I'm not sure how he managed to do this in one day, and amend the review, but I'll take his word for it. Destructoid has updated the review accordingly.

The original Halo Wars review was written before I had completed the campaign. This is common in our industry, where reviewers have to make a judgment call as to whether or not they have played enough for review. A number of our readers disagreed with the judgment call made, The Incredible Edible Egg in particular, and as the debate has continued, we have decided to address the issue with a very simple fix.
The campaign was completed, multiplayer was given a run, and now we're republishing the review. Very little has changed, because completion really didn't add anything to the opinion, but I elaborated on multiplayer so this is a more comprehensive article for you.

Going forward, we'll be aiming to bring a game to near-if-not-full completion, and will let you know if that is not the case. We've always preferred completed games, obviously, but sometimes it's not practical. Please don't expect us to play bad 70-hour RPGs

I'd say this is as close to an apology as readers are likely to receive, and although it's not quite the beg for forgiveness I'd like to see, it's better than nothing. I don't expect reviewers to complete every game, but there are a few key things that I think Sterling missed:

It's an AAA title, and readers expect a thorough review
If he had played the game for a few hours and realized it was utter dreck, then I'd say he's well within his rights to pan the game and move on to something more deserving of his attention. But it's a positive review, so why not fully justify the score for readers?
The review failed to address important features that most people care about in an RTS. I know Destructoid is known for its potty humor in reviews and whatnot, but there's not a whole lot of meat here.

The score remained an unchanged 7.0 after the second look. Which interesting given this:

As far as the two races go, it has to be said that the UNSC has a clear advantage.

If it's this unbalanced, wouldn't that drastically alter the score of the game?

Related Links:

The Future of Games Journalism

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Rock Band in Your Library

Cole Stryker — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 19:00:00 GMT

A video featuring Nebraska librarians setting up and playing Rock Band with a projector in an auxilliary room of some kind has local taxpayers outraged. OUTRAGED.

As a strict free-market libertarian, I'm a little torn about this. I think it's ridiculous that taxpayers should have to pay for this, and yet they're already paying for music listening stations, DVD racks and rows of computers, though I imagine the movie rentals help to defray the costs of some of these extra-literary programs. Isn't this a logical addition to a the strategy of "bring them into the building; they'll leave with books? I suppose the other reason to be shocked and appalled is that the librarians play test it for an inordinately long time.

Stephen Johnson from G4 disagrees with me:

Rather than being hounded by local investigative reporters and state auditors, someone should give these librarians a pat on their back, a new bookmark, as well as a raise. The people in Nebraska who are outraged over this should really find something else to worry about. Aren't there any cows that need tipping?

I guess if the librarian's job is to bring kids into the library, then they do deserve a raise. I can't help but feel this will do little to educate children. And at a time when many Nebraskans are having a tough time putting food on the table, I can definitely see how this would be interpreted as a slap in the face.

Ron Workman Calls Out Destructoid for Sloppy Journalism

Cole Stryker — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 23:00:00 GMT

UPDATE: DESTRUCTOID REPOSTS CRAPPY REVIEW

A few weeks ago I mistakenly associated Ron Workman with Destructoid, an error that probably made him throw up a little bit in his mouth. He left the site a while ago due to ethical concerns. I never paid much attention to Destructoid because their site is so crammed with user generated nonsense that I've never felt motivated to try to make sense of any of it.

Anyway, I've since developed a minor crush on the guy, being that he shares my inability to stomach amateur journalism from soul-crushingly profitable mainstream sites. Yesterday he took Destructoid's Jim Sterling to task for an unforgivably terrible review (Please don't watch the video, it's a terrible Zero Punctuation rip, complete with overwrought metaphor and overused vulgarity). Sterling gives the game a safe 7.0. Problem is, he never really played the game.

As Ron points out:

After reading Jim Sterlings review of Halo Wars, I was convinced he virtually didn’t even play the game. Then, someone at the party this weekend was smart enough to look up his in depth game stats. He didn’t even finish chapter 3 or anything past it, never played multiplayer (Which is basically the point) and could have made it through what he did in an hour or two at most.

Sounds pretty typical for mainstream reviewers. What's worse, he didn't even bother to address many of the points that you might expect from an RTS review. Balance? Resource management? Potential for game-breaking strategies? No. He uses the review as a platform for unfunny dick jokes and pompous anti-Halo commentary. Here's the response from Jim:

I know, and I knew this would happen before I even wrote the review. Ron Workman doesn’t like me, and he’ll do these things… I don’t need to encourage a bunch of teenagers and an old man who should know better.

I think the facts speak for themselves. This amateur pulled a review out of his butt, got caught red handed, and hid behind ad hominem attacks rather than even bothering to defend his integrity. Thank you Ron, for refusing to let up on these people.

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This is the Reason Why Gamers Aren't Taken Seriously

Cole Stryker — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 21:00:00 GMT

Did this image excite you? Well you're the reason why gamers lack cultural legitimacy.

Just joking. There are many more reasons why gamers are looked down on, but our fetishization of collectables, skins, and assorted promotional hardware is one thing that sets us apart. Who cares about the color of a console?

Sure, every hobby has its obsessive collectors, but I don't think there exists a pastime that elicits such widespread chatter when a new peripheral, add-on, skin, or promotional input device is released. I think this is partially due to the phenomenon that video games exist where art and technology meet. You can find plenty of film buffs who couldn't give a rip if their watching a film on 1080p, but technology has a much more direct impact on the consumer experience with video games.

A real step will have been made when gamers stop caring about hardware and branding and can focus entirely on what happens on-screen. Probably won't happen for a long time, but by golly it would usher in a golden age.

(insert obligatory joke about how it will match the RRoD better)

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Tom Chick Gets His Panties in a Bunch over The Lost and the Damned

Cole Stryker — Tue, 24 Feb 2009 19:00:00 GMT

So, Tom Chick, of Fidgit and others, won't be playing Grand Theft Auto: The Lost and the Damned.

The reason I won't be playing Lost and Damned is because after a couple of hours with these characters, I have no desire to spend another moment with them. These are unlikable thugs doing reprehensible things. Bikers, who are traditionally the bad guys, are presented with all the usual stereotypes that make them bad guys. They're brutal, vulgar, and cowardly. I can't tell one from the other. The one who I think is supposed to be me is as typical a bald space marine as you'll ever see.

What I don't get is that this seems to be par for the course with GTA. Shouldn't we expect a nihilistic company of thugs embroiled in hyper-stylized, hyper-violent urban warfare? Maybe Nico offered a little bit of sweetness, but if you go back and look at the earlier GTA games you will find a parodic universe that encourages the player to cause as much heartless devastation as possible. The whole point of the game was to do as much dirt as you can get away with while avoiding the cops. Before the game developed cinematic proclivities, it was all Tarantino-esque geysers of blood and ultraviolence.

What's more, I'd like to remind Rockstar that with great commercial success comes great responsibility. It would be nice to see a modicum of social conscientiousness in what is arguably the face of videogaming presented to the world at large.

Ugh. I can't vouch for Lost and the Damned because I haven't played it, but I can't understand why Chick would expect anything other than mindless violence from GTA. I kinda liked the series better before it became the poster child for the "See, games can be as deep and important as films" crowd.

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Geo Eye makes Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X. 'Pop'

Cole Stryker — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 23:00:00 GMT

Check out this trailer from Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X. (Cripe I hate typing that out).

This is actually pretty exciting. Playing around with Google Earth is fun, but it doesn't quite provice the visceral thrill of flying through real-world landscapes that a flight sim would be able to provide. I have never purchased a flight simulator, and I never quite understood the appeal of the genre, but I'd venture to guess that this is the most compelling development that the genre has seen in many years.

Can't help but wonder if this is a terrorism concern? I bet Homeland Security's got a close eye on this one.

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Brawler Theory

Cole Stryker — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 22:00:00 GMT

We've come a long way since TMNT II, folks. You might not think that brawlers are the most cerebral of genres, but there's a surprising amount of theory that goes into the creation of games that allow players to do little more than smack NPC's around.

Gamasutra has posted an interview with Creative Director Tom Smith from THQ, who discusses different beat-em-ups, and how they managed to occupy specific niches within the genre. Here he talks about attack groups:

Prince of Persia and Ninja Gaiden both keep enemies in a single group, with one enemy breaking from the group to make a single attack. This works well with smaller groups, but for our game, we want over a dozen enemies at once, so we need to spread them out more if we're going to fit everyone.
Mark of Kri and Genji felt a bit artificial, because one enemy from the group would call the player character out for multiple attacks while the others watched. Genji could at least argue that the pattern fit the dueling style of the game. I did like the surprise attacks that Mark of Kri added from the far group-it made those distant enemies much more meaningful. The player has to keep half an eye on the outer ring at all times.
But overall, God of War and Heavenly Sword had the best feel. Having multiple enemies near you keeps things on edge and makes it harder for the player to tell what to expect next-which was reassuring, since that was the basic direction we were already considering.

I never really gave it any thought! He also throws in a nugget of weird human psychology:

God of War: Enemies in the far group just stand around and look relatively uninvolved. But they're zombies, so it looks OK. (Personally, I believe the popularity of zombie-killing games is partially fuelled by the lower AI expectations-they're supposed to be mindless, so game development is easier. That, and zombies are the only thing as fun to kill as Nazis.)

So, zombies are an easy way for developers to slack off a bit when it comes to programming peripheral enemies. Sneaky.

There are six more pages of crunchy design theory. Go read it!

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Spring Cleaning: Selling Your Old Games

Cole Stryker — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 21:00:00 GMT

Some of us hoard all of our games. Others sell their games off as soon as they beat them so they can afford new ones. Others save up their Gamecube games until they have a financial crisis and need some quick money. Like me.

I don't feel bad about selling these games because I know that Nintendo will almost definitely one day make them available to me via download for a paltry sum. Failing that, there's always emulation. Purists like our editor John would surely scoff at such madness, but then, he's sitting in his New York penthouse using Prima Guides for toilet paper. He wouldn't be able to relate.

What surprises me is how little I care about these games. To me, they represent the best the Cube had to offer. And yet, if I had a free day, there is not a single game here (disclaimer: the above photo is not my collection) that I would choose to play over a newer game, except Metroid Prime and RE4, which exist within their own universes on which no sequel could improve.

Smash Bros. Melee? Please. Eternal Darkness? Clunkfest. Super Mario Sunshine? Gag me. Almost across the board, I have no desire to run through any of these games. It's an interesting contrast to my record collection, which I would never even think of selling. My Astral Weeks vinyl? Half a decade old and priceless! I think this sheds light on something that I think a lot of real "games are art" people really don't like to admit: Games are often improved by sequels and better technology, whereas this never happens with (gasp) real art forms. Not saying that old games aren't worth playing, but all things being equal, I'd rather play a current-gen version of a game than last-gen.

Cue RAA-AGE.

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