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Children are the Future (Of Cheap Gaming Junk)

I often preach “The more things change, the more they stay the same” because it makes me a little less frightened of the direction the world is going in. I still have my curmudgeonly moments, though. Today, while partaking in public transportation, the bus hit a bump and my face was subsequently introduced to a schoolgirl's backpack. The sack had the usual teenage ideals scrawled on its felt (because five minutes with a two dollar Sharpie can change the world): “Tears,” “Peace,” “Emo,” “Love.”

There was also video game paraphernalia dangling off the various zippers and clasps: jangly keychains featuring the more plastic members of Square-Enix's character roster, including Sora and Yuna.

And I thought, “Oh God, why.”

Then I thought, “But who am I to judge? I've been there.”

Posted Mar 06 2009, 11:14 PM by Nadia Oxford with | with 2 comment(s)

Filed under: bowser, final fantasy x, kingdom hearts, nadia oxford, merchandise, illusion of gaia, toys

Everybody Poops, But Pray Bowser Doesn't Need To

Just when we got used to labelling RPGs as a narrow, stagnating genre, here comes Nintendo with a big idea about touring Bowser's bowels.

1UP dropped some details about Mario & Luigi 3 for the DS. The RPG features the kind of A-1 Weird story you're only going to squeeze out of Japan: the Mushroom Kingdom is suffering through a bout of disease that inflates its victims like balloons (oh man I know a group of fetishists who haven't been this excited since Dig Dug). Mario fails at being Doctor Mario, and Bowser suddenly grows ten sizes and eats everyone.

Of course, Bowser is never allowed to be the Final Evil in any Mario-based RPG. It turns out the big turtle is being controlled by dark forces who want to move into Peach's sugar-frosted castle and Bowser's millipede-infested pit. What are these forces up to? Aw, they just need a good summer home, no doubt. The important thing is Mario and Luigi are trapped inside Bowser's digestive system and the need an out. Protip, guys: there are two options and neither of them are as pretty as an afternoon's walk.

Posted Jan 15 2009, 06:54 PM by Nadia Oxford with | with 1 comment(s)

Filed under: nintendo ds, mario, super mario bros, bowser, nadia oxford, superstar saga, mario & Luigi 3, luigi, body, mario & luigi

Japan Scares Me: Mario and The Western Show

Edge Online ran a small feature piece this past Monday on artist Antonin Fourneau’s new multimedia project called Oterp, which appears not on canvas or film but on Sony’s PSP hardware. Oterp creates different sounds and music depending on its audience’s physical location using a GPS to track them. Fourneau’s creation, as Edge points out, joins the ranks of i am 8-bit and Reformat the Planet as evidence of videogames’ growing influence on humanity’s creative endeavors. And that’s great. It’s wonderful to look at how the life-imitates-art-imitates-life cycle is incorporating a still-young medium. It’s inspiring to see games inspire. That is, unless you spend a lot of time on the internet. Then you see what videogames have done to people’s minds. Especially Japan’s mind.

Posted Aug 27 2008, 05:00 PM by John Constantine with | with 4 comment(s)

Filed under: john constantine, psp, mario, bowser, japan scares me, edge online, princess peach

End Game: The Necessary Evil of Boss Fights

Warning! Danger! Other exclamations accompanied by loud noises and/or flashing lights on-screen! The boss fight is a staple of single and co-operative multiplayer game design, instances placed throughout a game to act as a final and extreme test of a player’s skill at a given game’s rule set. In his expert dissection of boss fight design over at Gamasutra, Nayan Ramachandran uses the metaphor of pedagogical structure to describe the roll of boss confrontations in gaming:

Games in which bosses appear have levels that are usually designed like a traditional class syllabus. If you were to liken the the length of a game’s level to a semester of studying, learning the game’s boundaries and mechanics and the flaws of the enemies it throws at you, then surely the boss is the final exam for the class.

Testing the skills you’ve learned on your journey to this powerful character, as well as the powers and weapons you’ve collected over time, the boss character is meant to be a milestone of achievement for the player. It offers structure where there might not be any. It is the personification of a climax.

Ramachandran predominantly uses examples and forms culled from action based gaming to examine the form but boss confrontations cross most game genres.

Posted Jun 18 2008, 10:00 AM by John Constantine with | with 1 comment(s)

Filed under: john constantine, gamasutra, mario, halo, boss, bowser, Nayan Ramachandran

about the blogger

John Constantine, our superhero, was raised by birds and then attended Penn State University. He is currently working on a novel about a fictional city that exists only in his mind. John has an astonishingly extensive knowledge of Scientology. Ultimately he would like to learn how to effectively use his brain. He continues to keep Wu-Tang's secret to himself.

Derrick Sanskrit is a self-professed geek in a variety of fields including typography, graphic design, comic books, music and cartoons. As a professional hipster graphic designer, his recent clients have included Nerve, Pitchfork and MoCCA, among others.

Amber Ahlborn - artist, writer, gamer and DigiPen survivor, she maintains a day job as a graphic artist. By night Amber moonlights as a professional Metroid Fanatic and keeps a metal suit in the closet just in case. Has lived in the state of Washington and insists that it really doesn't rain as much as everyone says it does.

Nadia Oxford is a housekeeping robot who was refurbished into a warrior when the world's need for justice was great. Now that the galaxy is at peace (give or take a conflict here or there), she works as a freelance writer for various sites and magazines. Based in Toronto, Nadia prizes the certificate from the Ministry of Health declaring her tick and rabies-free.

Bob Mackey is a grad student, writer, and cyborg, who uses the powerful girl-repelling nanomachines mad science grafted onto his body to allocate time towards interests of the nerd persuasion. He believes that complaining about things on the Internet is akin to the fine art of wine tasting, but with more spitting into buckets.

Joe Keiser has a programming degree from Johns Hopkins University, a tiny apartment in Brooklyn, and a fake toy guitar built in the hollowed-out shell of a real guitar. He writes about games and technology for a variety of outlets. One day he will stop doing this. The day after that, police will find his body under a collapsed pile of (formerly neatly alphabetized) collector's edition tchotchkes.

Cole Stryker is an American freelance writer living in York, England, where he resides with his archeologist wife. He writes for a travel company by day and argues about pop culture on the internet by night. Find him writing regularly here and here.

Peter Smith is like the lead character of Irwin Shaw's The 80-Yard Run, except less athletic. He considers himself very lucky to have this job. But it's a little premature to take "jack-off of all trades" off his resume. Besides writing, travelling, and painting houses, Pete plays guitar in a rock trio called The Aye-Ayes. He calls them a 'power pop' band, but they generally sound more like Motorhead on a drinking binge.